Kristina Mackenzie Miller


Main~ffc540
Speaking~ffb100
Charm~ff9c00
Obsession~ffbi40
Self-Doubt~a05a1c
Other's Speech~a66d00


~district eight~
~fifteen~
~obsessive~
~charming~



Appearance

Like most of the people in District Eight, I have never had enough to eat. Because of that, I doubt that my body will reach its full potential. Even my parents agree with me on this theory; they are both well above average height, yet I stand at just five foot two and one quarter inches. Some of the boys (and girls) who are attracted to me say that I'll probably have another few inches to grow, but I know they are lying just so they get on my good side, which is practically empty (if you haven't got that already.) My weight isn't what you would call large either, to be exact I weigh 98 pounds. I'd be heavier if my parents could actually afford a damn meal, but they're too poor to support two kids. Yet I digress; I've already had my growth spurt and my jerk of an older sister was done growing by the time she turned fifteen. It's a helluva long-shot for me to even become a normal height, and if I wouldn't put my money on that chance if I were you.

Th people who say that I am beautiful (trust me, I've heard it said) can't actually mean it. There is not anything special about me, I raggedy clothes passed down to me from my older sister, nor am I blessed with the curves that most men want on women. My older sister, she's the lucky one, she has all the curves, she gets the love from my parents that I don't. What's there for me? Nothing. She got everything that I wanted. I think that I look empty; empty in the sense that I have seen and felt too many undesirable things for me to even give a shit anymore. The truth is, I'm just good at covering up my emotions so people don't ask what's wrong.

Dirty blond hair goes down to the middle of my back. I hate my hair, all I want is for it to be wavy, wavy like the pretty girls, but no, my hair has to be straight. My hair doesn't even cooperate with me, some strands never budge, they refuse my willing of them to become uniform like the rest of my hair. At least my eyebrows look nice, curving the exact same way that my almond shaped eyes do.

If my eyes were on anybody else, maybe they would be attractive; but on me, they just point out how absolutely pale my skin is. I do take advantage of people staring into my eyes though, using my eyes to portray any emotion I am feeling (this does not include crying... not in public at least.) The blank stare that is usually on my face is just me thinking about life, it means I really could care less about what someone is saying to me, because, really, what does it matter?

Personality

Other people really are of no interest to me. All they think about is what matters to them, not at all what matters to me. Them, them, them; that is what goes through everyone else's head. Not what is happening to poor Kristina over there, just what is happening to them. If other people weren't like that then maybe I would actually give them a chance, and maybe I would try to be friends with them. It isn't my fault that they act that way though, not at all. Since there is no hope for everyone else I don't even bother with trying to become friends with them, if they wanted to hang out with me than they should make an effort.

Honest to God, I don't get why everyone else has what I want. Everybody else has perfect hair, or nice clothes, hell, even a decent family life; I don't have one of those things. The guys and girls that I try to get with go for others, and I know it is because they think I am ugly. The only people who want me are the druggies and the people who have no other options. It is NOT fair. All I ask for is a little bit of love in my life, but nobody (and I swear to God that means nobody) who I want to love me loves me. I've done nothing wrong my whole life, yet somebody out there lets everything awful happen to me. It's like I'm God's stress ball.

With my crushes, I don't think that I make my attraction to them obvious. I've had my make-out flings with boys and girls, so is it really that odd that I come in the next day of school with their address memorized. If they kiss me they are mine until I say so otherwise, and nobody could ever prove that I am wrong about that. Even if they are drinking so-called alcohol, I doubt that they are getting drunk. They are probably just faking so they can make an excuse to not be in a relationship with me. I don't know why they do it though, since they clearly think that there are girls and guys my age who are better looking than me. And if they think that, clearly they are right. Still, kissing someone means you like them. I've never kissed a guy or girl that I don't like, and it should be the exact same way for the person that I kiss. If not then they are just a self-serving asshole, and they should spend the rest of their lives in hell. I'm sure that most people would agree with me about that, and if they don't, then clearly they are stupid and wrong.

When I really, really want something, like making out with a boy or a girl, somehow I always seem to get it. That doesn't work out for me in things like people loving me, which I don't get (because on the inside, I'd say that I am an extremely lovable person. Don't you agree?) It probably is my look, if only I could be like the popular girls, pretty (which I'm obviously not) and perfect (I'm only that on the inside.) It's really fucking weird though, 'cause whenever I really try to get something -as long as it requires no emotions-I can get it using words. I don't think that I'm a manipulative person, so clearly I just have a lot of charm.


History

If you haven't taken note of it already, I hate my stupid family. Neither my sister or parents have ever showed an ounce of love towards me. In fact, it is like they wish that I was never born, (being honest, I probably am a fucking mistake.) My damn parents were too stupid to realize that they could not handle having two children, that they were too poor to raise both properly. So once I was born, they did the reasonable thing; they chose which daughter they were going to give everything. Because that is the reasonable thing to do, right? Make a mistake and then decide to just ignore that mistake. I know that I wont do the same thing (because I am not a stupid heartless asshole who decides that one child is better than the other. Because I have a fucking heart. Because I'm not like my fucking asshole parents) when I'm a parent, (which will never happen because nobody gives a damn about who I am on the inside. They only care about my distasteful looks.)

Maybe I'm being unfair (since people who choose to completely ignore someone they brought into the world just because that someone is a mistake deserve a fair trail) to my parents. I shouldn't just tell you all of these awful things (which maybe I deserve, since I'm just a stupid, unwanted, mistake) that they've done to me (for no reason other than them being ass-holes.) Gnarls (Lucifer [what, you don't like the middle name I gave my father?]) Miller and Faith (Soul) Shredder met in their last year of school, and they say it was love at first site (which -as they say in District Eight- is total sheepshit. Lucifer probably thought Faith was hot and she probably found him decent enough to be bearable.) The two went on to get married (only because Faith was pregnant with my older sister, Demi, and having kids before marriage is not something you want in District Eight.) Apparently, the two were (and still are) deeply in love with each other (again, total sheepshit, they fight all of the time. True love my ass,) so they decided to tie the knot. I'm sure they only did it because of the gifts they would get at the wedding. They would manage, wouldn't they? Well, they did decently, until they had me (the mistake that they never should of had.)

But that's really enough about my parents, I should really tell you about my (gets everything I wants, beautiful, curvy, loved) sister. She probably felt that I was a threat to the love that she got from my parents (but that is really far from the damn truth.) I'm six years younger than the nonperfect Demi, the girl who is loved by every guy. Of course my parents find her perfect, just like everyone else in the world they treat people on how they look, not on who the person is on the inside (because if it was the other way around, then they would be treating me the way they treat Demi.) If only it were the other way around, then everyone would love me, they would treat me like a goddess.

It isn't like I don't get attention at all from my (awful) parents, it's just that the only time they acknowledge me is to insult me (which I guess I deserve.) Maybe I don't get the best grades in school, but my parents tell me to my face that I am stupid, that just doesn't seem right to me. I've honestly given up on ignoring them, it is just impossible (to ignore those jerks) to ignore what they say. It has been the same way my whole life, either being ignored or just treated like an unwanted pet (which I must be nothing more than.)


odair

Other

I'm not really sure why she got so vile as it went on. But, she was made for the halloween plot as a vampire.