Deandra Solothurn [D2]

Dear diary? No, Hello, Hi, Sup bitch, Howdy, Screw it

Hi, I'm Deandra Solothurn, and this is the stupidest thing I've ever had to do.

Sam says that I have to stop holding in my emotions, and it was either this or talking to her about my "feelings." I don't like doing that, so that's why I'm writing in this piece of crap. She says it's a good way to "vent." Whatever.

Since nobody is actually going to read this garbage, I'll just talk about how much our lives suck. I'll start from the beginning.

My parents are John and Mary Solothurn, and I have a little sister named Samaria. I call her Sammy, or bitch, but only I'm allowed to call her that. And since she's never going to read this, screw you Sammy. Haha.

A long time ago, before she even met our dad, mom dated a guy named Daemon. I like to call him douchebag. Not long after they started dating she found out that he was part of a cult, where a bunch of guys worshiped demons or some freakish crap like that. Oh, and he was a criminal, too. I heard he killed some poor bastard. Yeah, what a catch.

Anyway, mom broke it off when she found out about his creepy club. He wasn't happy about that, so he tried to win her back, and that's where our badass grandpa comes in. When douchebag tried followed her home one night our grandpa was there to defend her. The guy pulled out a knife and tried to attack them, but grandpa kicked his ass to the curb - actually, kicked him to his grave. It was self defense, so you can't blame him. He was trying to save his daughter. I would've done the same thing.

But apparently, douchebag had a brother.

He didn't show up until after Sammy and I were born. Don't ask why, because I don't understand those freaks of nature. Our grandpa was dead, and Sam thinks he wanted to get revenge by killing Mary's family. That's how he ended up at our house, holding a knife above Sam's bed. We were eight at the time. Our mom was able to stop him from killing Sam, but nobody was awake to save her. He stabbed her with the knife and set our house on fire. All I remember is waking up to her scream and the smoke alarm. Dad was the one who chased him off and grabbed me and Sammy before our house burned down. It was too late for mom, though.

It doesn't stop there.

Dad wanted revenge. I mean he really wanted it, and so did we. But he was obsessed. He was scared that same douche would come back and hunt me and Sam, so we traveled the district a lot, moving from one trashy motel to another. It was hell for all of us. We had to drop out of school and start learning how to fight. Not like a career, with fancy weapons and all of that crap. We used nothing but the skin on our knuckles and the knives in our pockets. Career training? Screw it, we became our own type of killers, and for all the right reasons.

That's why we're freaks. Dad wanted to hunt criminals, especially the ones in that cult of douchebags. We couldn't live normal lives because he wouldn't let us, but I'm okay with that. I'm pretty sure I was born to be a freak. Sam doesn't think so, she says she wanted to go to school, and almost turned her back on us because of it. She came back, though, because family should always stick together. She knows that. And we're stronger when we're together, like we were born to be a team.

Yeah, I'll admit, we're pretty awesome. Most of the time.

But I wasn't good enough to save our dad. He actually found the bastard that killed our mom, but Sammy and I couldn't help. As soon as he caught wind of him he just left without us, and we didn't get there in time to save him. The son of a bitch killed him right before we found them.

So I killed the douchebag myself.

I don't know why our dad went without us. We spent years trying to find mom's killer together, and then he just goes off by himself and gets killed. We were supposed to be a team! The Solothurns! Sam says it's because he wanted to protect us. I should believe her, but I think it's bull. Our dad needed the back-up. Hell, I was the one that killed that asshole, not him! He should've taken us with him. Maybe he'd still be alive if he had.

After that we made it to the cult's hit list. They want us dead, we want them dead. They're murderers and rapists, we're heroes. So we hunt each other. Sammy and I usually win because we're badasses, but a few times they've caught us off guard. One time they actually jumped me in a freakin' alley and knocked me out.

Yeah, I'm about to tell another story.

I don't remember much. Just that five or six of them came around the corner after I ganked their friend. I kicked a few of their asses before they hit me with a crowbar. Cas says she saw them drag me to some creepy, abandoned warehouse (of course) and tie me to a chair. I didn't actually wake up, but I think I remember smelling blood. Not sure if it was mine or not. I hope it was.

Anyway, that's when Castella busted me out. She saw them kidnap me and followed them just to save my ass. I didn't wake up until after she carried me to her house (she's a career, she's freakin' strong). That's how we met, by the way. She's a career that wants to be a Peacekeeper one day. It's weird, yeah, and she's weird too, like really weird, but she's one of the closest friends I've ever had and the only person besides Sam I can trust. Now she hunts with us all the time, and she's really damn good at it. She needs to get that stick out of her ass though. I've never seen someone so damn awkward and..reserved. It kinda creeps me out. Oh well, she makes me laugh, and I could use that once and awhile.

My hand hurts, so I'm going to take a break and have a beer.

Okay, I'm back. I don't know why I'm saying this because nobody is going to read this. And if someone is reading this you need to stop. If it's Sammy, go screw yourself. If it's Cas, stop snooping; watching me sleep is creepy enough. If it's somebody else, burn this book and forget everything you just read.

I'm pissed off because Sam forgot the pie again. I swear, every time I want pie she forgets it! She says it's because she was "distracted." I think she's secretly trying to put me on a diet. She tries to eat healthy rabbit food and complains that I should stop eating so many bacon cheeseburgers.

Screw you, I can eat all of the pie and bacon cheeseburgers I want and still look adorable.

I just called Sam a bitch, and she called me a jerk. Good times.

I don't know what else to talk about. I mean, we just found a new place to stay it. Top secret. It's in a pretty weird place so nobody should be able to find us except Cas. I don't know how long we'll be staying here, but I like it. This is the first time I've had my own room in years. I can actually put pictures up. The only one I have is of me and mom, because that was the only thing that survived in my room after the fire. I was a cute kid. Blonde hair, green eyes, the whole package. My hair got darker as I got older - its more of a dark blondish brownish color now. But I'm still cute. Actually, I'm pretty hot. Sometimes I go to clubs and hook up with hot dudes. Sammy says I do it too much, but hey, our life sucks and I could die any moment, might as well have fun while I'm alive, right?

Sam seems to be more like the relationship type of girl, though. Me, not so much. Commitment really isn't my thing. I'm committed to family, friends, and saving people, that's about it. In this life you can't afford to have a steady boyfriend or crap like that. They end up getting killed. Just look at my parents.

And on top of that, there's the Hunger Games. Why would anyone want to have kids with that going on every year?

That's one thing I hate about where we live. So many proud careers trying to act tough so they can go on tv and kill people to be famous. Most of the time they just die, which is stupid. Cas would probably hate me for talking about them like that, but seriously. At least she isn't like them. She's a lot different. She's not an asshole or a bitch. Cas is just...Cas. That's all I can say.

I have to give them some credit, though. They can kick ass. I can too, I mean I'm pretty strong for a girl. I've got muscles in all the right places, but at the same time I still have nice boobs and awesome hips. Sexy waist, too. But yeah, I can kick ass. There's no way in hell I'm volunteering for the Games though. I have better things to do, important things.

Well, I'm done. I guess I feel a little better, but you wanna know what will really make my night?

Sleep.

I'm gonna go crash, and probably burn this book tomorrow.

Bye.

-Deandra Solothurn