Levy Winston D6

Levy Winston D6 May 10, 2014 19:38:10 GMT -5

Post by levy on May 10, 2014 19:38:10 GMT -5

Name: Levy Winston
Age: 17
Gender: Male, but born Female

District/Area: District 6

Appearance:

    I’m seventeen years old, born on June 21st. I was technically born female, but I am really male and if you say otherwise or call me a “she” instead of a “he” I will not treat you kindly. My parents still do not understand this fact. I reside in District 6, and live on the more upper-class side of the district.

    I have black hair of a length that would be described as long on a boy but short on a girl. My bangs are long enough to cover my entire forehead, and I leave them brushed off to the side or pulled back into a hat. My eyes are a jade green, which is rather uncommon, as I’ve never seen the colour on another person before. Despite my age, I never quite grew out of the “baby face”; I still have cheeks that are a bit chubby, eyes proportionately bigger than my other facial features, and a small nose. This results in my often being mistaken for a person several years younger than I, usually around twelve or thirteen. My skin is as close to white as skin can be without be being camouflaged against snow in the winter. It’s rather embarrassing.

    I’m at a healthy weight in relation to my age and height, but I’m unhappy with it. I’m too skinny. Stick-thin. I hate how feminine I look. More than anything, honestly. I’m only 5’3”. The average height for an adult male is 5’10”. Just another thing I absolutely hate about me. I’m not exactly physically weak, but I’m not strong either, leaving me somewhere in the middle. Average. Nothing special. I prefer darker colours as a clothing choice, though they tend to make me look a bit skinnier, which I’m not fond of. I wear t-shirts and pants that are a size or two larger than they should be to disguise my chest and the bit of my almost-chubby stomach that sticks out. I am made of nothing but physical flaws. I’m not even in the right body.

Personality:

    I would like to say that I am a kind person, but I honestly don’t know. If someone misgenders me I pretty much hate them forever, but other than that, and my constant use of sarcasm and insult-based humour, I’m nice, right? Maybe not. But if I am friends with you I can promise I am the most loyal and caring person in the world, or at least I will try my absolute best to be. I was alone, other than my uncaring parents, for most of my life before I met my best friend, so I understand the importance of these things. I had friends before Vergil but they never stuck around for more than a year. I understand though, I wouldn’t stay friends with me either if I had been them. If someone I care about needs a favor, no matter how small, I’ll do it without expecting anything in return. I’ll go too far with this sometimes though. I focus so much on other people I have no time to work on myself and my own issues. I become too dependent on others. If anything happened to Vergil, I have no idea what I would do with myself. The one thing I fear above all else is either of us getting selected for the Games. If I lost him I would be too. And I couldn’t leave him either. There’s no way I could ever win. I’m too weak, I always have been.

    I don’t have the best social skills either. I’ve been shy and untrusting most of my life, since I had pretty terrible friends for a long time who no longer like me. However, once I get to know someone and start opening up to them, it’s hard to get me to stop talking.

    Despite what having what looks like a good life from an outside perspective, I hate my life and I am almost never really happy with the way things are. I have a bigger-than-average house, two parents with perfectly decent jobs, more than enough food, a warm bed, and more. There’s so much I can’t even list it all. I should be happy, but I’m not. The positives, no matter how many, will always manage to be overshadowed by the few negatives. I’m not fond of school, or nearly anything else that the Capitol encourages, but I go anyway. My parents want me to go, and I’m legally required to go, so I do. At 2pm every day, when I’m finally allowed to leave that hell, I don’t go home, I just head straight to the library. I don’t like reality much, so I live inside the fantasy world of the books I love so much. Sometimes I even try writing my own, though writers’ block usually gets the best of me.

    If I were to be selected at the reaping, I would be terrified as hell because there is no way I would ever win. I wouldn’t even be able to survive all the press events beforehand. There’s no way my gender would be recognized, and I would have to wear all these dresses all the time which would make me hate myself even more. I’m not the type who would try and form any alliances, but I’m also not the type who has the skills necessary to survive on my own. I can run fast, I can climb trees, and I can hide, but that’s all I’ve got going for me. I learned how to run early on in life. The library is a couple of miles from the school and if I were to walk it would take too long. Since I go there literally every day, I eventually built up the skill. The climbing ability came from countless times having to sneak into my own home via window. My parents have gotten upset about my life choices a few times and I’ve had to leave for a little while. The front door would always be locked when I got back, but I found my way inside. My hiding ability didn’t really come from experience of any sort; I’m just small enough to remain undetected when necessary. Though, I probably wouldn’t get the opportunity to use any of this. Chances are I’d find a way to off myself before I got so far as the Games. A final act of defiance against the Capitol.

History:

    My childhood was, honestly, pretty miserable. My parents definitely wanted to have a child; it’s just that they wanted a daughter. Not a daughter who wants to be a son. When I announced this news to them, they simply said I was delusional and forced me into dressing overly feminine and wearing too much makeup. It wasn’t until I literally set fire to a few of my dresses in the backyard that they gave up on trying, and instead chose to constantly misgenders and ridicule me. I’ve been this way my whole life, it isn’t as if it’s a rebellious teenager sort of behavior. Growing up living with these people has affected me so much. And it isn’t much better at school either. I had friends for a while, but I wasn’t really close to any of them. I can’t even truly call them friends, they were always closer to mere acquaintances.

I honestly had no good friends until two years ago, when I met Vergil. I was fifteen, he was thirteen. Inside the library, there’s an area sort of like an attic. I think it was used as a storage area at one point, but it’s long since been abandoned and covered in infinite specks of dust. I bring a new stack of books up there as soon as I finish the last stack. I bring new reading material up there on a weekly basis. I’m a fast reader after so many years of this. Nobody else knows about my little hideout, it seems, and it’s become a sort of refuge when things gets rough at home, which they nearly always do. One day, about a week after my birthday, he was just sitting there, reading one of my books, hair falling in front of his eyes. I don’t know how or why he managed to find his way up there, but he did. We became close rather quickly and, after just a few days, it felt like I had known him since early childhood. Vergil is the one thing in my life that actually makes me happy. Even though both of us just sit there and read or write, not always speaking to each other, it’s much better than being alone. I like watching him draw things. It’s amazing how he can look at something and transfer it onto paper and have it look almost alive. I could go on for hours, but I won’t.

I have no idea what the future will hold for me. Writing has always been my passion, but I don’t think I could make a career from it. My parents don’t really approve anyway, they think I should attend college and become a nurse or a schoolteacher or something or that nature. Those jobs are typically those preferred by females, though. I wouldn’t be able to handle that. I can’t even handle thinking about that. All I know is that I want Vergil to always be around.

Codeword: Odair

Other: (Vergil’s POV)

“Levy is the greatest friend I could have possibly been gifted with. Before him, I hadn’t met anyone that I could establish a real connection with. He is even closer to me than my own family is. There is no way that I could possibly find anyone else like him. He is simply irreplaceable. I just wish that he could be more positive about things sometimes. Seeing him upset is one of the worst things for me. I try to help, but I feel like I can’t most of the time.”