Cassia Du Baker | Capitol | FIN

Cassia Du Baker

I'm a blond bimbo girl, in a fantasy world

I smile, wide and bright just like I always do. I smile for the camera's give a little giggle and wave my hand daintly like mama always told me to. Cross your legs, shoulders back, head up and smile Cassia! her voice echoes inside my head. I wave again, a little more erratically then I slow down remembering that I need to look elegant and lady like- like a queen. I blink once and the camera's are gone, I am staring at myself in the full length mirror that lines the entiriety of one of the walls in my bedroom.

"Practice makes perfect!" I tell myself as I smile at my reflection, and she smiles back. I have practiced every day of my life to be a star super!! Or...is it super star...one or the other. Anyway, I always wanted to be a celebrity and go to the best parties and dance with all the hot guys! The thought of being super duper rich- well...more rich than I am now - makes me giggle again. I put my hand to cover my mouth cause my giggle is more like a pigs snort.

I need to work on that I think to myself as I walk out of one room into the next. I am yet again faced with a reflection of me. I love mirrors, I have to have mirrors everywhere in my house- if I could I would have them on every wall and window so that wherever I looked I'd see my face. I mean I have got to get used to seeing my beautiful face everywhere on the television and billboards and stuff for when I become super famous. 

Mama always told me to aim high, and thats what I am doing! See, my parents own bakeries, thats why their surname is baker and well I didn't think Cassia Baker sounded like a famous person so I changed it. My name is now Cassia Du Baker- I am not sure what Du means but I am pretty sure its a real word. I was never very good at school but being clever doesn't matter when you're famous.

I head into the bathroom and strip down and tread on my scales. Like the rest of the house- my bathroom has mirrors on all the walls- not just the one. So I can see myself from all angles. I look at my naked form, and I feel...disgusted. Even though the scale tells me I weigh 7 Stone and 8 pounds, I see fat everywhere. I grab my hips and pull the skin there. I grimace. 

God you are such a mess Cassia. God Cassia, you're so ugly. You try but you're still the fat friend. God Cassia you're feet are too big, your hair is too shiny and your eyes are too blue. I listen to my mind- insulting me. Though is it really insulting when it's the truth? 

I step off the scales, put my robe on and head to the kitchen. I can feel the tears welling in my eyes, clouding my vision as I stumble aimlessly to the kitchen and grab all the food I can get my hands on: Cakes, Biscuits, Cookies, Crackers, Crisps, Cheeses, Apples, Oranges, Banana's- anything I can find in my special cupboard I grab and take with me to my bedroom. And I eat.

Fuck knows how long I sat there eating food- it could've been 20 years for all I know! I hope it wasn't cause then I'd be 40 and that'd make me really old. I blink, and I see the empty crisp packets, cake boxes and things, scattered around me like a nest. I have eaten so much food, but my stomach still feels empty. 

Getting to my feet, I sniffle and clear my throat before I shout at the top of my lungs "GET IN HERE NOW AND CLEAN THIS SHIT UP! BRING ME A NAPKIN TOO!" 

While I wait for my sorry excuse of an avox to make an appearence, I get myself dressed in something pretty before I go for my afternoon stroll in the park. I am just slipping my pear earings into my ears when my avox scrambles into the room, looking a little nervous. I purse my lips and nod to the mess.

"Why the fuck isn't it clean? And Do you have my napkin?" I say as he hands me one. I dab my lips clean of chocolate before I turn back to my vanity, picking up a golden coloured lipstick. The gold slides on easily, gliding over my pale pink lips.

"Hurry up or I'll push you off the balcony." I glance at him "And don't think I won't do it." I snap as I stand and head for the exit. I don't look back at him, to see if he's working, I just carry on walking out of the bedroom and towards my front door. I pause briefly, to look at the scales. I glance away, put on my biggest smile and head out the front door.

I am not perfect.

Notes: Odair