crescent caroul | capitol | fin

C R E S C E N T
you're ripped at every edge
but you're a masterpiece

"There's no way she'll do anything serious with her life."

"I know! She acts life life is a joke!"

"Or a fairy tale or something."

---

"Sweetie, we honestly just feel like you shouldn't have to work. Why would you want to?"

"Your mother is right. We have worked hard so you don't have to."

"Just... Just enjoy the life we've created for you. Most people would love to have it."

---

"Mom... What if I told you I didn't want to live off of you guys forever?"

"This again, Crescent?"

"It isn't that I don't appreciate how hard you guys have worked over the year or anything. I do. It's just--"

"Crescent! I've heard enough of this!"

"Mom! There is going to come a day when you aren't going to be here for me! Neither will Dad! If I depend on you guys forever, what'll happen when I'm all alone?"

"Oh, stop being sentimental. Honestly, most people would be content with a life of wealth free of charge."

"Well, I'm not."

"You'll get used to it."

---

"Your mother is worried about you."

"Really? I couldn't tell."

"Don't be sarcastic, Crescent. She says you barely talk to her."

"I don't have anything to say."

"At all? I don't believe that. I raised you, remember? I know you."

"If you knew me, you'd know that I don't say anything because it's never what you guys want to hear! For someone who 'raised' me, you really don't know anything about me, do you?"

"What is with you these days? What is it that you want to do so badly that it sounds better than--"

"Than doing absolutely nothing for the rest of my life? Dad, literally anything sounds better than that."

"Fine. Go, Crescent. Go try and make your own wealth. But in twenty years when you look back, and see how hard you've had to work, and you see how much you deserve and how little you've received, your mother and I may not be there to say we told you so."

"You're wrong. You're so, so wrong."

---

"I can't-- I can't believe you are leaving so soon."

"I'm nineteen, Mom. I am supposed to leave now."

"No, you aren't. You are supposed to let us take care of you. Protect you."

"I don't need protection anymore!"

"Will you at least agree to let us help you when you fall?"

"Thanks, Mom, for the vote of confidence."

---

"That was the driver. He's out front."

"Please don't do this."

"I love you Mom."

"Crescent! Ple-"

C R E S C E N T
now i'm covered in the colors
pulled apart at the seams

Crescent Caroul was never supposed to be anything. A princess by default, a queen by nature, and money that belonged to her parents filling her pockets: that was supposed to be her life. But she dared to dream. She dared to want her own life, and despite the constant ridicule, she worked. She forced people to open their eyes and see her. She forced people to believe in her, even when she was the only person in the world who did.

Her own parents lost touch after she demanded she get to live her own life. She sees them perhaps once or twice a year now, and it's always the same awkward small talk: "How is work?" her mother always asks. "Great, actually. There is talk of me getting a promotion." "Wonderful." "How are things around here?" "Lovely. The garden is coming along well."

It has become torture over the years. She knows they must share her thoughts about the situation, that it would perhaps be easier to just sit in silence, or maybe just not even bother to see each other at all. They have their views and Crescent has hers. And she knows that until she decides to change the way she wants to live her life, they will no be content. It doesn't matter that she is first in line for one of the most sought after jobs in the Capitol. It doesn't matter that she has made something of herself in less than half a decade, when, if she had chosen the life her parents wanted for her, she would still be sitting alone in a big empty house with a closet full of clothes she would never wear and people who didn't care.

She made the right choice doing this. She knows she did.

She does still cling to the hope that they'll eventually accept her choices. Time and time again she has thrown them into a tailspin over the years, and this has been the only time they haven't come around. When she told them she was gay, they were fine with it. When she told them she hated her school, they moved her to a different one. Having ambition has not kept Crescent from being spoiled over the years. And perhaps that is what hurts so much that now, when she is making the biggest decisions of her life, her parents won't help her because she has chosen a path different from the one they paved for her.

Year five on her own, and she is supposed to be the happiest person in the world. And on the surface, she is. She paints her smile on every day, barks orders at anyone who is supposed to be listening, tells her tribute who lovely they are. She does what she is supposed to do. And even though she is surrounded by people, she is all alone in the world. And the coldness of the night and they emptiness in her chest is what keeps her smile from being genuine, the orders from being whole-hearted, and the tributes from truly being lovely to her. She is alone in the world. And she is afraid that'll never change.

Though she has never had a set style-- does anyone in the Capitol? -- she does tend to stick with darker colors. Black adds to the wow-factor she tries to emote through dark hair, sometimes adorned with raven fathers or black headpieces, and her coco-toned skin. Her eyes are like cinnamon, and the only immediate sign of warmth people see in her besides her approachable, easy smile. She is a pretty girl. But she tries to hide it. Perhaps her parents would have allowed her to work for a living if she had turned into a more tragic-looking person. But she is not tragic. She isn't perfect by any means, either. She had a small, stubby nose which is made up for by her over sized, pointed ears. She is also abnormally petite. Despite perfectly healthy eating habits, she remains about a hundred pounds soaking wet, and stands at only about five feet tall on a good day. She wears six-inch heels practically all of the time in order to attempt to hide her height. Something about it makes her feel weak, even though people usually are intimidated by her regardless.

She hopes her parents will see what she has become some day. She hopes they'll understand she really did have potential all along. She hopes they respect her choices. Most importantly, though, she hopes they are more hurt by her absence than they are letting on. Because no parents should be okay with losing touch with their children, not really. Right?

Ripred, she hopes so.