tynan zodiia // d7 // [fin]

tynan zodiia // d7 // [fin] Aug 10, 2015 20:46:18 GMT -5

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Post by arx on Aug 10, 2015 20:46:18 GMT -5

Tynan Zodiia

Your birth lies between the dates of December 22nd and January 20th. Saturn is your planet, your ruler. An Earth sign, you were born to you were meant to use and improve the material world. Marked by a Cardinal signature your energy propels you in a singular direction. You are a Capricorn. You are the sea goat. The stubborn will to climb the highest most treacherous mountain peaks is your upper half; the swiftness of your fishtail keeps you from drowning in the emotional depths which you navigate. Practical, ambitious, wise, disciplined, patient, cautious. Dictatorial, stubborn, inhibited, conceited, detached, pessimistic.

I use. I achieve.

January 1st. The beginning of a new year, new goals, new dreams. It's when everyone attempts to start fresh. Resolving to do something - lose a few pounds, get promoted, have a child, drink more, drink less, be a better person - that they will likely never do. Most of those resolutions are empty. But not mine. Never mine. I blow out the candles on my cake (twenty-one next year) and instead of making a wish, I make a resolution for the year. And I keep it.

On my 5th birthday when Dad's business partners and other associates were too drunk and too happy to know what they were doing, I was given some advice. "Boy, your father is the smartest businessman I know. Watch closely. One day, you'll be him!" It may have been one of my proudest moments, even at such a young age, to be known as the future of my Dad's prolific business. He pat me on the head, smiled, and I just knew it. I wanted to be my Dad. I still do.

But I don't want to leave--- I won't leave.

Sometimes I wonder why he left. Why would someone choose to leave their family behind? Why would you leave a successful business behind? Why leave? Why? It's crossed my mind that he had found something better than too many children and a nagging wife. But this is District 7, not the Capitol. The odds of something better on the horizon was highly unlikely. So maybe he was protecting us? Maybe he got into some trouble and left to save us all. But even still that would be the wrong decision. Family, and the strength of it, beats all. And so I'm brought back again to the same question: Why?

I was 9. My siblings even younger. And without a father. I'll be honest with you--- I tried. I tried to fill that void and to become the father figure of a broken home, a broken family. But I was just a nine year old boy. the responsibility to keep the family strong was on my shoulders. And I didn't know what I was doing, nor did I know how to be the voice of reason or the man I was told to grow up to be. Earning the title of 'father' would be my greatest accomplishment yet. Something I'm still striving to achieve. Something I will eventually be able to handle. But not yet.

For now I'll have to stick to Drug Lord.

I know it's wrong. I knew it was wrong the very moment I had started. That first puff of smoke, that first cannabis crop I grew and sold, the first crumpled up wad of bills I was handed---I knew that what I was doing was not only illegal, but likely to get me shipped off to the Capitol to face years of imprisonment and misery. But there are necessary risks one must take to protect their family. I carefully weighed my options. Made lists, planned for months on end, I am smart. I'm not just some punk kid selling a few joints anymore. I'm the owner and operator of an entire underground drug ring. My own business, something I built all on my own. It wasn't handed to me or built by someone else's hands. It's my achievement. And it's enough to save the family if ever Mom disappeared into thin air.

I've known parents to do that. I'm prepared. I won't be caught off guard again. I'll be ready. For anything. I'm ready.

My ideas have been regarded as---unorthodox. Sure. I can admit that starting a line of drugs to combat the loss of my father and to keep the family wealth intact is certainly not the regular path grief takes. But it's working. And I'm succeeding. ...Mostly.

I'm not like some of my siblings. They can smile, they can befriend, they are naturally gifted with being 'likable.' And I'm gifted with the tendency to piss people. I don't try. In fact, I try really hard to be the good guy, the guy everyone wants to talk to, the guy everyone wants to hang out with, the cool guy. Instead of making friends I make enemies. And in my line of work, that can be deadly. It will likely be deadly. I'm just lucky my drugs are so potent. I'm certain I'd be dead if they weren't the best in the District. And if you hadn't guessed already, I'm rarely wrong.

Straightened tie. Brushed hair, brushed teeth. Shining shoes. Pressed shirt, each button in its rightful place. Everyday I leave the house dressed as the business man I have always dreamed I would be---and even still I am not that man. Mom takes care of the business I wish I could own. I have other affairs to attend to in case she fails. Probability of such things in likely, though not for some time. This is why I have taken such great time in preparing such a risky back-up plan. Drug Lord Tynan is ready.

I have used what I have been given. I have achieved what I needed to.

I am prepared.

No Zodiia will ever suffer under my reign.

|| male || twenty || district seven || capricorn ♑ || zodiac family plot || fc: marcus hedbrandh ||

odair