you are an interesting child [ undertale thread tracker
Dec 20, 2015 5:19:58 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Dec 20, 2015 5:19:58 GMT -5
Welcome to the Undergrounds, kid.
ASGORE DREAMER ♔ " THE KIND KING "
[ arx ]
The adopted kids look up to him for the most part, father, he's dug too many graves to be a true king. Once upon a time he ruled with humans and could've been mayor, but political assassinations are crazy these days- huh. He had a wife and two sons - one pair of twins - both beautiful, one obviously more talented than the other at dodging bullets (sorry, "friendliness pellets) at an infant age. Chara, the less talented one died, and his wife fell into a grand depression. For all its worth, his other son lived a prosperous age before the dad guy locked him away for almost strangling Alphys. That's okay, he locked himself up not too long after his wife died of a broken heart - sappy, I know.
Awee, come on, kid, don't cry - what'd you say your name is? Frisk? What a dumb fuckin' name. You'll be safe here, and all that foolish- look, Frisk, it's kill or be killed. Remember? A child like you won't survive against three of them alone, I bet you couldn't even take Napstablook, I get you miss your family and you want to leave the ruins, but you can't. A note from a friend, Frisk, shut the hell up. You wanted to hear about the people here, so here we are, it's a new life here for your tiny little red heart and if you don't learn tonight you'll bleed out fast.
She's the one you'll want to avoid - Undyne, the undying. She smells like angry tuna, but she's really not that tough. There's something between Alphys and her, don't know what but it probably happened while they were hiding behind Asgore's hairy ass back. Undyne's the favorite - yeah, what about his son, that's what I ask myself too. After losing Chara and the sanity of his wife, she was the first one he adopted, even trained her as a career the same time he trained his son. Of course, his only son left was more talented, isn't he always, slashed her left eye and she's been a bitch since then. No she didn't die, idiot. She's been on human watch since he was locked up - none of the kids trust outsiders considering they were raised around a legacy that they were insane murderers.
Alphys? What would you want to know about that garbage? She's just some nerd brain with a heavy crush on Undyne - heard it on Mettaton's game show last week. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it you pay attention; Asgore's son choked her out once upon a time because she kept making him trip on medicine. In the undergrounds, she's kinda the doctor, and Asgore was always looking for a way to fix his last blood - yeah, real fucking moron. Ever since locking him up, he's had her experimenting on mutts; no, I don't know how he fucking gets them I never leave this home, just like you, and just like the rest of them. She won't ever finish the experiment, what did you think, moron, she's too obsessed reading about super heros and writing about Undyne and her's domestic life in the margins of her notes - now, shut up.
Wait who? Oh, you already met Sans, that's. Uneventful. He's just another asshole, doesn't really do much besides make bank and acts like everybody's older brother - Frisk, stop asking so many damn questions. He has a sister here, Papyrus, and he protects her to the point of letting her live in an imagination, but that's all Sans really fucking does besides make bad puns. He created the currency system down here, they call it gold but really it's penniless. Only people who really care for it are him and Muffet, I'll get to her later. And yeah, he's stingy with that, charges everybody gold if they need him to do chores so everybody has a little on hand just for that fucker. Really unimportant - I swear it, don't waste your time.
Okay, before you ask, Papyrus. Sans's little sister, she's like sixteenish? Tall, blonde hair, kick ass cheekbones and super into herself - her favorite food is spaghetti. Pleased? I'll answer every single question you got, trust me, we have all damn night to answer those fuckers, Frisk. What, no, don't talk to her either - she's a kiss ass to Undyne. You see, Papyrus really buys into the whole royal guard thing, dreams of being apart of it, so of course, she hates humans like you. Hell, even I hate humans like you. But honestly, there's not a serious bone in her body, for lord sakes if a word is too short for crossword she just adds a shit ton of z's. Sans is the whole reason she survives, probably would forget to eat without Sans holding her hand. They're idiots.
Okay, topic change to somebody less, useless. Did you see Mettaton at all? Probably not, he was too busy looking at himself - tell him his legs aren't that great. He's always putting on Alphys's stories, playing all the roles of course - it's pretty much the only entertainment in the undergrounds and Sans charges gold, but he's always talking about what's happening after the undergrounds, what happens after Asgore. What he doesn't realize is that there is no after, his acrylic nails won't get him out of that. Huh? He does his own make up yeah, nobody else wants to get that close to him except for his dumbass cousin.
Yeah, they call him Napstablook. Well, Mettaton did, started off his newscast - he has different shows, Baking with Muffet, the Mettacast, I mean, I don't watch them. What was I talking about? Naps, right, his name is Nathaniel Blook, but he's the only one who actually isn't content with wasting away with seven other dumbasses, so he cries himself to sleep every where but his room. That's your room, by the way, originally his, the wet spot? Yeah, tears. Probably, he's pretty pathetic, only ever talks to his cousin and the snails in the basement.
Okay, back to Muffet, I know what I said. Basically, she acts like everybody's little sister, constantly inviting people over for tea parties and stuffed animals and bows in her hair, yada yada yada. She's really big on the money system too -the one Sans made yeah - always sells her baking shit for high gold. She sells like, crumpets, spiders and tea - yeah, spiders. Her room had an infestation, but the ones that Undyne and Papyrus didn't kill, she trained to draw on the walls with cobwebs. Little cunts make it hard to walk between the walls - she's one of the younger ones yeah, her and Naps are about our age.[ nyte ]
Hmm? What about Asgore's son?I'm doing fine.
