r u n {flxss]

The best way I can avoid people, both alive and in my dreams, is through the cold December's water. The first step into the water is always the worst, but you'll warm up to it. A splash on the face can wake you up even if all of your energy is drained out of you. If there is one thing I do not want, it is to go to sleep. I do not want to see Zeke die, or myself be killed. I don't want millions of insects crawling up and down my skin. I don't want to be afraid.

I've tried to avoid fear as long as possible, but at night, fear is the only thing I am. I wish all the oxygen in the air was bravery and the carbon dioxide could be fear. I'd be able to breathe out the fear and let the bravery in. I could be strong on the inside, not just the outside. I could have the strength to have nice dreams rather than nightmares.

After about an hour of swimming, I decided to paddle my way back to the shore. There's no use in being in cold water for hours on end, so I might as well take a break. Swimming is one thing I've known how to do ever since I was little. It helped me to avoid the harsh not-reality of slumber.

I'm up to the freezing sand. Shirtless, I try to avoid eye-contact with everyone I see. I've hated drawing attention to myself. People already stare at me for my dark splotches on my skin. I don't need any more reason for people to eye me down.

I don't want to feel like the only person standing up, and by tripping over a foot, I'm not standing at all.