how am i gonna be an optimist about this? {d6 lemony snicket

The Beatrice Lucafont Community Home for Young Arson Victims has never been famous for its world-altering hospitality or service to its residents. Of course, this is somewhat to do with the fact that every child in its care has ended up there in the most terrible circumstances imaginable - having lost their parents, belongings and often all of their history in a devastating fire, and with nowhere else to go. Nevertheless, it often attracts the attention of the curious - perhaps because of its absurd twisting appearance on a street full of sleek medical facilities, perhaps because sometimes you could peer through a window and see something utterly unbelievable; like a room with mushrooms seemingly breathing on the walls or snakes slithering across the floor. However, it's almost definitely notable because of the rumours of the elaborate secret society its carers and children have formed within its creaking timbers. Whether these conspiracies are just elaborate stories, or whether they're entirely true, the children who live within Beatrice Lucafont's creaking hearth feel the effect of the whispers, and their own quirks, every day of their lives.

Orphan the First: The Bad Beginning

name - age - played by Onyx

A misfit with a deep love of theatre and performance. You'll probably find them performing monologues by themselves in full costume - mostly because no one else wants to spend the time to perform with them. Otherwise you won't see them at all, because they'll be in disguise with such dedication that they really could be anyone.

Orphan the Second: The Reptile Room

name - age - played by gamemaker ☢️ ivan korsch

Even though there's a no pets rule in the house, this child has managed for all their time as a resident to secretly keep and care for various land and amphibious reptiles in their room. The attachment to these mostly quiet creatures probably stems from the orphan's attachment to the family they lost, but the explanation for why their specifically so interested in bottling and saving their pets' venoms is not so obvious.

Orphan the Third: The Wide Window

name – age – played by OPEN

Justifiably, this orphan seems to have a fear about absolutely everything. Since they were introduced to Death when their parents perished, they appear to worry that Death will come to them round every corner, in everything they do. If it were convenient, this child would surely stay in the safest place they could think of; but their only solace, their love of books and words (especially ones ending in "phobia"), keeps them returning to the small Home library to lose themselves in writing.

Orphan the Fourth: The Miserable Mill

name – age – played by OPEN

If you met them for the first time, you'd think that this child simply had an attitude problem, not that they'd experienced such life-altering loss. The other orphans can often hear them stomping through the house in their heavy leather boots, which complement their constantly scraped knees from all the time they spend kicking around and scrambling in the city's dumps. The residents can also tell where this child has already been, from the brightly coloured gum they're always chewing, and stick to the walls and floors of the house in small, vindicating acts of rebellion.

Orphan the Fifth: The Austere Academy

name – age – played by OPEN

Unlike the previous child, this orphan is intensely strict on rules and regulations. They know every law of Panem off by heart - and how to bend them, of course, as well. They loathe to associate with those who break the rules, but must admit there's a certain inimitable thrill in doing something they're not allowed to, or shouldn't do.

Orphan the Sixth: The Ersatz Elevator

name – age – played by OPEN

No one really understands how this orphan manages to make the best out of every situation, but somehow they have been able to build an environment which is intensely sophisticated and classy in a Home which is otherwise so run-down. They love to wear clothes which can only be described as "suave" and although they have no passion for rules themselves, know every piece of etiquette for every situation in order to uphold a respectable reputation. They're enamoured by the Capitol, and every other resident could agree they would certainly fit in there much better.

Orphan the Seventh: The Vile Village

name – age – played by OPEN

Suffering from deep separation anxiety since the loss of their family and home, this orphan intensely resents the no pets rule in the house. They find it hard to spend time in the Home as all the other children remind them of the life they no longer have, and instead elect to explore the District and make collections of objects to keep them company. Perhaps in objection to not being allowed a living companion, they have an eerie collection of small stuffed taxidermy animals. Most of the other residents find them disturbing and tend to stay away from this child and their room.

Orphan the Eighth: The Hostile Hospital

name – age – played by OPEN

Perhaps the only one of the orphans who truly appreciates the medical focus of their neighbourhood, this child knows four hundred different ways to lobotomise a living human being, and definitely has a desire to try some of them out. They’re obsessed with medical procedures and equipment to the point of madness, often sneaking out of the Home to attend lectures at one of the training universities, or even just to watch operations taking place from through a window. Though they could use their extensive knowledge for good, they never have – it’s more about the specific knowledge, and the satisfying goriness of the subject matter, that they find fulfilling.

Orphan the Ninth: The Carnivorous Carnival

name – age – played by OPEN

This child was hungry for risk and danger before the fire that killed their family, and perhaps even more reckless afterwards. They have a passion for dangerous stunts, aspiring to be an escapologist, and they often have to coax the other children into agreeing to lock their hands together in cuffs and throw them into rivers. Their risk-taking isn’t limited to escapology – they like to push themselves to see how far they can fall without hurting themselves, how long they can hold their breathe without passing out, or how much they can push a Peacekeeper before they get beaten to a bloody pulp.

Orphan the Tenth: The Slippery Slope

name – age – played by OPEN

It doesn’t take much to make this orphan happy, as their imagination is so vast and vivid that they could lose themselves in it for days. They’re a hopeless romantic who treats every single one of their friendships as if it’s the most important thing in the world, and they appreciate the importance of deep trust within those friendships. Nevertheless, it would take someone truly special, and a deeply forged bond, for the child to discuss their own personal hopes and fears with another person, like the fact they’re deathly afraid of heights, to share with them the dreams that they record in a dream diary, and perhaps even to fall in love with them.

Orphan the Eleventh: The Grim Grotto

name – age – played by OPEN

The small herb garden that the chid cultivates in their room, growing deadly nightshade and other toxic and carnivorous plants for fun, isn’t the only sign that there’s something a little…off about them. Their room is deemed off-limits even to the carers, but no one would go in there even given the choice. The way that mould has been carefully encouraged to grow up the peeling wallpaper, the terrible smell, and the offputting lack of curtains, are all part of the mystery in why the orphan is the way they are. Of course, the obvious answer is that they saw something so disturbing during the fire that destroyed their previous life that they were never able to fully recover in their mind, and by maintaining a level of distinct uncleanliness they have been able to make themselves feel more grounded in reality, more a literal part of the dirt that makes up the world.

Orphan the Twelfth: The Penultimate Peril

name – age – played by OPEN

This child is perhaps the most worrying simply because they are a total wild card. Their passions and delights verge on psychopathic at times but seem to be totally random and fleeting. It’s very likely that they were actually responsible for the arson attack that ended them up where they are now, and that if they so desired they could inflict more damage on the people, and the building, that are part of their new life.

Orphan the Thirteenth: The End

name – age – played by OPEN

Silent, patient, but with wide eyes and a bright mind this child sees and hears everything that goes on in the house. They know layers upon layers of secrets about everyone around them, just by merit of being ignorable in a room – something they consider a talent. The other children and the carers are wary of this orphan, knowing that if they chose to they could topple every person in the house by revealing their weaknesses and shortcomings to others. There’s also the chance that the fragile exterior hides a short fuse within the child, and at any moment they could snap, becoming even more dangerous and vicious than the orphans that seem to pose a constant threat. Don’t they say it’s always the quiet ones?