cold as a stone and rich as the fool || elara

oh, my mind's getting violent

it only multiplies in the silence
give you a fist full of violets and
watch 'em blossom underneath your eyelids

Prologue.

It was only three days after I stood over him, my knees pinning him to ground, the trainer holding my hand over my head in victory.

The camera crew stood there in shock, mouths hanging open, even the anchor women had no words.

How did some no name girl just beat our latest victor in a matter of minutes? It would be wonderful if they could tell me because even I’m not sure of the answer.

A mistake.

The only plausible explanation, because there is no way in hell that Justice Fray the boy wonder would ever through a fight to a girl. Especially not for a girl like me. One with no name, no title under her belt.

A nobody.

They’d be saying it was all a fluke. But maybe, just maybe, winning the games had nothing to do with skill, maybe it had all to do with luck. And if I had to guess Justice Fray was a boy who was full of it.

The next thing I know I’m pulling myself off of him because of some perverted comment that fell from his lips, and suddenly I felt that mine were way too close his. Cameras flashing, bright lights, and microphones all in my face at once. My eyes rapidly blink, as if keeping them shut long enough will make them all disappear. But every time they open, no one has moved. Just the sound of buzzing questions all blurring into one in my ears. I’m not meant to be in the spotlight.

I’ve lived in the shadows my whole life.

And that’s most certainly where I belong.

Three days later and Justice Fray has all but left my mind, but from the flowers that showed up at my doorstep, I most certainly have not left his.

Not one arrangement, not two, but three are there by noon that day, each with a note either requesting my presence on a date or some cheesy poem that he most certainly did not right. Mother has never been in a better mood, humming around the house as she places them in vases, making sure each is well cared for. Me on the other hand-

I have never been more miserable.
Everything this boy does is nothing more than something for the public, the handsome man who won, even inches from death’s doorstep. I can only picture the camera’s following him as he went to the store, capturing every moment as he wrote a note and sent out to his new ‘mystery girl’.

A label that I most certainly do not want.

And when the fourth bouquet of flowers arrived at my doorstep, I’ve decided I’ve had enough. Before my mother even has a chance to see them I quickly step outside and grab them, making my way towards victor village, not sure which house exactly is his, but knowing all the cameras will lead the way. A thought that crosses my mind briefly, hoping that somehow they don’t see.

Cameras were the only thought that I was worried about it, but it should have been the following eyes I was most concerned of. A girl walking with a large bouquet of flowers, determination plastered across her face was most definitely not something they were used to seeing every day.

And the last the last thing that I expected to run into was a another girl, walking out of Justice’s house, the moment that I was walking up his front steps. Even though I know that it is something I should have expected from him, of all people, even when he was sending me flowers upon flowers to my door. But for some reason-

A part of me couldn’t help but feel a little more broken inside.

”A low cut top would be much more effective,”

Her voice rings loud and clear even through the flowers, accusation in her voice. She thinks I’m one of them. A boy obsessed suitor. If only she really knew, then she’d say how foolish she really was.

I peep my head around the large arrangement, expecting some typical blonde with a glare, judging. But the girl who stood there was oh so different. No wonder Justice Fray had brought her home. Beautiful and petite, exotic.

More lovely than I would ever be.

Even with her hair tousled and shirt slightly wrinkled. I know what they must have done, I knew it the moment she walked out, but it still stung ever so slightly.

”Well, I’ll have to take your word for it since you clearly seem to know what he likes,”

She stood there for a moment in stunned silence. But no snarky comebacks fell from her lips.

"I like you,"

Were the only words she spoke as she winked as me as her shoulder brushed as she gracefully took herself down the stairs.

I gently placed the flowers on his doorstep, grabbed the pen I put in my pocket, and turned over the note he had so carefully thought out.

Please.
We both know this is something that would ever work.
Thank you for your generosity.
They really are lovely.
-Elara

I tuck the note gently back in where it belongs. And I hesitate a moment longer than I should, hand up to the door, a part of me wanting to knock. To see him one last time, to remind myself he wasn’t good for me.

To remind myself I would never be good enough for him.

But instead I turn my back on the door, on him. Knowing that we will both be better off this way.

Knowing that this is how it’s meant to be.

And I do not let myself think of the boy that I somehow was able to defeat ever again.

i've been running from the moon
since i got burnt by the sun
your face is brand new
but your smile is gone