A Shard of a Memory [Sparks/Mackenzie] Blitz

When all the love around you is dying,

When Bolts died, I started to fall apart. When Florence died, I collapsed.

They both had gotten so close to making it out of the arena alive, but they were struck down by someone else before they could emerge from the hell of it all with their lives. This time, I could have done something to help, though. I could have volunteered in Florence's place to save her life, but I didn't, and I'd live with that mixture of regret and guilt for the rest of eternity.

When it came time for the victory tour, however, I wasn't sure how to feel. The tribute who'd emerged victorious wasn't my sister, but he had killed her killer. Then again, Akira, her killer was from District Three as well, so should I truly hate Akira as much as I do?

I wasn't sure.

Regardless, I had one thing really on my mind when my mother, two of my sisters and myself approached the new victor, Mickey Pryce. I knew that, had Akira won, he was going to bring Florence's token back home to us- the gear that I'd given her. Akira didn't win, though. Mackenzie killed him. The true question I had now, though, was: did he bring the gear home for me?

I spoke to him with the calmest tone I could manage, despite the immense amount of emotional pain I was feeling, thinking about how Florence really was gone.

"Did you bring it back for me? Florence's token? The gear?" I asked of him.

"I'm her sister, Joule. Had Akira won, he was going to bring it back for me, but..." I didn't continue. However my words made Mackenzie feel, I didn't care. I just wanted to know if he'd brought back the one piece of my sister's life that I could truly have back- the token that had reminded her of home.

[306 words]

How do you stay so strong?

Wake me up

"Mama," I said, "Am I going to be next?"

I asked this question of my mother shortly after Florence's death, and she looked at me, seemingly mortified. I'd asked the same thing of her after Bolts died, and I'm not sure why. I suppose that's just the question that stuck in my head.

All I knew now was that, no matter how close the Sparks got in the arena to winning, we never really did make it out.

The Sparks seemed just destined for death, and I feared that I was the next one on that list.

My mother insisted that I wasn't going to die in the arena, but I wasn't sure that I could believe her. Had she ever said that to Bolts? To Florence? Did they believe her?

I was twelve now, meaning that I could be reaped starting in the 80th Games. I could be the next one to die, and that terrified me.

Or it could be Cordelia.

Or Joule.

Or someone else I cared so dearly for.

I wasn't ready for it. Although, I don't think I was ready to face Mackenzie Pryce, either, but Joule insisted that we speak to him during the Victory Tour, so that's what we did. When Joule asked him a question right away, I tried to stay hidden, sort-of clinging to my mother's arm like I would have when I was little, trying to use her as a form of 'protection' against the world's dangers.

[238 words]

I'm living a nightmare

This life is filled with hurt

My children mean the world to me. They're my main source of happiness. Unfortunately, my happiness is now starting to fade as my children leave the realm of the living with nothing I can do in order to stop it. I just wish that I could keep them safe, but I know that I can't do that entirely. The Games are a force I can't prevent from stealing them away from me. They took Bolts, and now Florence. I don't want them to take anyone else. I don't think I could handle it.

When Industria asked me the same question she'd asked when Bolts died, I was just as unsure of how her question was to be answered as she was. Neither of us truly knew what words were going to come out of my mouth right then. After a moment of silence, however, I assured her that she would be okay, even though I didn't completely believe it myself.

Cordelia, Dusty, Joule and I were to meet with Mackenzie Pryce, the new victor, on his Victory Tour. I wasn't sure that I was ready to face him, but I knew that I had to. I had to be strong and do it for my children. I couldn't let my daughters think that I was weak. They needed to see that their mother was just as strong-willed as their fallen siblings.

When Joule spoke to Mackenzie, I was thrown a bit off-guard. In all honesty, I hadn't expected her to say something like that to him. It was almost a bit rude, what she said, and I felt obligated to apologize, or at least say something to Mackenzie, despite my distaste for victors as a general group of people.

"Mr. Pryce, I hope that Joule didn't come off too harsh. It's just been really difficult on all of us, and we want to know if there's any memory of Florence that possibly could have made it back to us..." I explained this to him, hoping that he didn't take what Joule said too personally.

[340 words]

When happiness doesn't work