lost in the silence // laneyxtati day 1. fight.
Oct 23, 2023 16:29:47 GMT -5
Post by d4 tati pelotte [azalea] on Oct 23, 2023 16:29:47 GMT -5
tati pelotte
There's only silence.
(until, there isn't.)
. . .
The exceptionalism that I had damned myself to was gone by the night time. The night time was supposed to be my time to lie awake and think of home, desperately trying to mentally prepare myself for whatever hell lay ahead. My eyes are held prisoner by the floating neon lights outside my window every time I try to sleep, and so I end up counting sheep until waves wash them away. They are led to the slaughter because that is simply how I will it: one, two, three. I think it's called desensitisation.
Darkness finally consumes my body and it becomes a cocoon for my body. Tomorrow is a brand new day: it is time to learn and excel, prove my worth so that there's something for people at home to root for. There was no time for the ghosts and a flashing picture of Teddy Ursa in my mind; time was ticking, faster by the second, because my heartbeat chimes with it and my pulse quickens. Everything changes soon, but it's a good thing I changed a long time ago.
But then, there's a countdown. It smashes through the glass of my chrysalis and tears me from my peace. A booming sound echoes between every corner of my room and I sit up in the panic, because no, it can't be happening no, because no, my dreams are supposed to be the escape I've yearned for for so long. To replace them with a nightmare would only be too — it would be too —
and then I realise that the word I'm looking for is perfect.
There is no rest for the wicked, and by design, that is what I am.
I drag myself to the training room, eyes like the sun and the moon. My mind is eclipsed by the weight of everything that has been thrown onto it; I can't even remember if I've actually slept or if I just lay there again, falsely safe in the knowledge that I'd wake up to the comfort for yet another day, and be able to feel like there's still a moment to compose myself and my thoughts.
The Capitol's generosity is the same grandeur facade that I have always been. Architecturally beautiful but flawed in the foundations — we could collapse at any moment.
"Well," says Laney Redd, her hands cracking as she readies herself for... whatever this is. "This isn’t exactly how I planned to meet. Though, I suppose District Four won’t care as long as it’s one of us who comes back, right?" I look her up and down and wonder how it happened to be us that was put here, whether her coldness is innate in District Four and if so, whether I have it too.
Then I remember that I have felt the same chill ripple through my spine numerous times.
(I am haunted, for better or for worse.)
My foot cracks as she strikes and the room starts spinning. The machine whirs.
"They really do have us by the throat. Just like that," I snap my fingers, "and we're raising hell. Just like that, nothing really matters and nobody else matters. Sad, but inevitable."
[ tati attacks laney ; unarmed ]
ZD_POjWnpTunarmed
[ 5132 -- broken left wrist -- 6.5 damage ]
ZD_POjWnpTunarmed
[ 5132 -- broken left wrist -- 6.5 damage ]
unarmed