Letting {G O}//KEANU death post
Feb 21, 2014 2:52:39 GMT -5
Post by minie on Feb 21, 2014 2:52:39 GMT -5
K A E N U F R O S T You don’t know how lucky humans are to be able to die, we tell each other our whole fucking lives, that we don’t want to die, but in realty imagine if you couldn’t die. You would watch your friends and family die for all eternity, do you want that? I know I am laying here taking my last breaths telling me, that dying might be one of the best things that has ever happened. I was never loved, and never wanted, not on this world, but maybe in the next, there will be someone who will accept for who I am. Maybe I will get answers I have longed for a long time, who knows what there is for me beyond this world of fear and hate. I was dying slowly, as if my body just didn’t want to give up, but my soul was tearing it’s self away from the body, trying to cross over into the light. The light where my existence will be wanted, not here, nothing like here. Nothing like this hell hole they sent me too. Why did they sent me here? I wish that someone had volunteered, because dying is peaceful, but I never wanted to die here. This is the last place, I will be, and the capital is nothing but cruel and hateful. They sent children to die in a place worse than hell, a place where even the devil would run from. Now my souls is running and it is running as fast as it can, just in slow motion, everything is in slow motion now. It seems as if very slowly the world is turning light and the cornucopia around me is fading, very slowly but I can tell the difference. My breaths are shorter and they don’t come as often as I hope they would, because they are fading just like everything around me, and my whole life. I see moments from my history, where Spider and Ivy would corner me and taunt me. They would call me mean names and they would act if they were something better than me. I manage to suppress a smile on my face, not a nice one, but a mad one. One that belongs to a man that is about to spiral into insanity, but what difference does it make, I’m already dead. A few seconds of insanity won’t harm me much more. I look up towards the sky and with a raspy voice, the voice of a man that knows he is dead I shouted with all my might “So Spider, what do you think, you stuck up little bitch!? Is this what you wanted, did you want to see me dead!? Huh, what’s wrong, you didn’t get to kill me yourself, well now I feel bad!” I laughed out loud, it hurt so much, to speak to laugh, but it felt so good at the same time. “Crazy huh the way things don’t work out the way you want them too. But you wouldn’t know that Spider, because you get everything you ever wanted. And you know what I’m glad I didn’t because then I would be like you, a heartless stuck up motherfucking asshole. I would be like the rest, and you know what I am not and I never was. I was always nicer even if you socialized more, you just used those people to your own advantage, your no better than Ivy, did you ever think about that?” tears streamed down my face as I shouted into complete nothingness, hoping that Spider would be listening. My pain overwhelmed me, it took away my idea of what is wrong and right, before I would know it was wrong to yell at Spider like that, because she will stab my eye out and eat it for breakfast. She would tear me to bits in my own house, just like I was torn to bits in the arena. She would scream and yell for mommy and daddy to drive me to the adoption center, because they didn’t want me there. Now I’m in the arena and she can’t hurt me, does she know that? A voice in the back of my head, said that she could still go around school telling rumors and lies about me, making my existence a joke. I know she would do that, because Spider has a cold heart and she would never do anything good for anyone in her whole entire life. She would pretend to be friends with someone and then she will stab them in the back, if it is what she needs to get what she wants. I lay here when I am dying, thinking about Spider, I truly am wasting my time that I have left on this planet, on Spider?! I have other’s that I need to complain about, I have 18 years of anger and hate bundled up inside of me waiting to burst and explode, waiting to be shown to the world, and not just about Spider, but about everything. “Dad, if your listing I hate you and I always have hated you. I will never take this statement back, because it’s the truth and it always have been. I don’t even know why I call you dad, because you, Jack, you have never been a dad to me, just a person that pretended so he could keep making my life as miserable as possible.” It felt so good to be able to say that, to say that to him and make sure it stays in his head, a burned scar forever. “You know Jack, if I would have won, the first thing, I would do is punched you in the face, and then Spider, or even better killed the two of you off, and then one by one I would kill the rest of, till only River and Herz are left because they still have this innocence in them that can be saved. I wanted to save them, from this fucked up family, but now I can’t. So Herz listen up, or family is evil the other people in this world are much better than us, go to them, run away and never turn around. River stop being afraid, in other words, if you are afraid then you will never make it anywhere and they will cast you away like they did to me” I was finished I had nothing else to say to my family, they didn’t deserve anymore. I just wanted to get out of here as soon as possible, but would that be so easy? I don’t think so, what feels like hours have gone by, but I know they were just minutes possibly seconds. Time didn’t matter anymore, all that mattered was that I was still alive when I wanted to bed dead “Oh kill me already!” I shouted to whatever god was out there making sure we died. I wanted to be sure that they take me and that they take me soon. I wanted out, out from this world, this arena, and this hell we call life. I wanted to die and how I wanted to die. I was ready to give up everything, because that is the price for death, everything. “Thistle, Aidin. Thanks for being my allies and only friends I have ever made. Thistle I will see you on the other side, I am sorry you didn’t make it any farther. I’m sorry that you had to die so soon, you probably had a family that loved you to go back to. I didn’t, did you know that? I hope you find peace, I hope they didn’t hate you like they hated me. I hope you had someone that loved you more than anything, I hope your life was better than mine, because mine sucked. Aidin, I’m glad you are alive, at least I think your alive, go win, win for the all of us. If you win, I want you to punch my sister in the face for me, when you go to district 3. Take a powerful swing and break her nose, do that for me, good luck bro, may the odds ever be in your favour” Then the lights went out… …Forever. [Keanu Frost has died] template by chelsey |
THANK YOUS
The staff: Thank you for creating these games and this site in general, it is an amazing place to be and has become my second home, I am so ever thankful for that.
Pogue: You were the best ally I could ask for, and not just that a friend, you believed in us and you supported our alliance even though most people wanted us dead from the beginning. I am so glad that I got to know you through this and it’s something I don’t regret.
Kitty: You aren’t just an ally but a friend and a true one, you are there for me when I most needed it, and you believed in us. It was one of the best descriptions I have ever made, adding you to the alliance.
Marr: Thank you for trib sitting Keanu during the blood bath, it means a lot to me. You helped me keep my nerves down and not spiraling into insanity, though I am already there. Thank you so much for being a friend.
Ems: You are like an older sister to me, and you have helped me so much with all my problems in the past and present. I can talk to you when I need to and you are always there for me. Thank you so much.
Anna: I owe you a lot, because you are so awesome and you helped me as well with my many problems and were always there when I needed to rant about my life. You helped me keep up my confedence and you never let me down, I owe you so much, for the support you gave me.
Greenbeads: you were an amazing OOC mentor and you gave me some of the best advice, because of you, I made it farther, if it wasn’t I probably would have died after my first post.
Tribuits that are still alive: May the odds ever be in your favour