Salty Surprise [ Bloodbath: Upper Middle District Tributes ]

Dear Diary,

I am a survivor.

I watch as my weapon cut through Caspians hand, and I wonder if it was meant for Daniela and it just happened to connect with Caspian. My eyes were closed, because taking a life was not something I wanted to see myself actually do.

It was naive at this point, seeing as I had already helped cause a couple deaths. Russel was the first.

And then a cannon had gone off in the distance.

---

I might have been friends with these kids in another life. Daniela and Caspian specifically. They seemed like good people, willing to do what needed to be done. That was clear as day.

I wondered what Mario would have done if time didnt take him. I still remember the times Peach would stand at the top of her house. I always had to talk her down from the edge, tell her that there was so much more in the world than a stupid boy that died.

But that didnt matter to her clearly.

I will never understand that logic, and to be quite clear, my mother would probably push me herself if I was ever stupid enough to attempt something like her. She raised me to be strong, to be able to take care of myself with or without the aid of another.

She always told me that I was the most important thing to take care of in the world.

No other place in the galaxy had another Daisy Sarasaland.

---

I was unique, right? That was what my mother was trying to tell me?

I thought so for a moment, but then Caspian cried, and when I say cried, I meant it. I could tell that he did have the will to live, and now that it was starting to dwindle down into despair. I hated every moment of this, but neither of them could know that.

And then a cannon had rung out, and I watched as Caspian had taken the life of Daniela.

"I believe you Caspian." I say calmly the boat starting to stabilize enough for me to feel like I can breath.

I stand back for a moment, looking at the bodies strewn across the deck and I wonder if there was another answer. Maybe we both could make it off this boat alive.

If the capitol wanted two survivors, they would have probably intervened already. Right? Like there would have been some sort of intervention that would have probably stopped both of them from fighting?

I was stupid to think so clearly.

---

I stand tall even with blood running down my face. I feel tired, but that cannot stop me from what I actually want.

I want to go home and see my mother again, tell her how much I love her and that I would never ever take anything she said to me for granted ever again.

I would never hide anything from her either, clearly. Seeing as maybe this was stemming from all of that. I wanted to make my father proud too, wanted to show him that even in his death, I could still live a full life. One that he could be proud of wherever he was watching from.

Maybe he was the reason why I hadnt fallen victim quite yet.

I do not know, but I do know that Caspian is the only one on this boat standing in my way.

"I believe you Caspian." I say, my wrists tightening around my weapon.

"But I believe in myself even more." I say calmly as I pull my arms back, the boat finally feeling like it was leveled enough for me to focus my next strike. "And I will always choose myself over someone else." I said bluntly.

"Dont believe me? Let me show you."

And my weapon is pushed forward with the might of a thousand galaxies.

Love,
Daisy

[ saunders collection '05 - rave ]

Dear Diary,

I hate this part right here.

To think, that I would be one of the last few standing in this moment. There was nothing more than this boy, standing in my way. I was so close to making it out of this, and even then, I knew that this wasnt a guarantee. Nothing here would ever be? Right? That was the point of the hunger games, make children fight each other for our ancestors mistakes?

I wish it didnt have to be this way, because then I wouldnt have to be here, trying to become the girl that I never wanted to be. I wasnt raised this way, as I was meant to be pure and full of hope, but of course, life always found a way to subvert that. Whether it be taking the life of my father, or throwing me into a fight to the death.

I felt like time was moving slower and slower with each cannon that rang out. I wanted to blink my eyes and watch all of this end, but this was far from being over. Even if I won, I knew what would come of the aftermath. I would be subjected to nothing but harassment and put under a microscope.

But it couldnt be all that bad right?

I'd still have my life.

---

And even now, when I felt like it was all forfeit, I was confident that I could make it out of this situation. Caspian shares that he believes me, and I wanted to roll my eyes. I didnt want him to say anything more. He didnt need to affirm anything with me, he just needed to get out of my way.

Maybe if the situation was a little different, I would have been a little more understanding, remorseful even. Daniela seemed like she had so much more to offer to the world, but right now, in this moment, it didnt matter. She was dead, just like Gio was too.

I wish I got to learn the names of the other two that were here with us, but they probably would have gotten in my way too.

And we all know that I couldnt have had that.

If I wanted to go home, I was going to have to put as much distance between the like of us, and if I had to take a life, I would.

I was resigned to my faith.

All in.

---

Caspian was too. I could hear it in his voice as his weapon came down on my shoulder. It hurt, but the adrenaline was running through me, and I felt like this was the swan song I needed to dance too. If I wanted to win, I was going to have to show him that I was serious, and I wasnt sure if my words were enough for that anymore.

"I dont know if a dead person can actually forgive anyone." I gave him a light smile, gritting my teeth through the pain as I held up my weapon. I dont even know if my father could have forgiven me to be quite honest. I hoped he could have.

But hope did not exist past the world of the living.

I firmly believed that.

"And I honestly..." I look at him, noticing that he is full of fear and adrenaline, just like me.

"... Dont want to find out."

I think about my mother and my life back home.

"Not here."

I strike with my weapon.

"Not like this."

Anything to convince myself I could still be a good person after this.

Love,
Daisy

[ saunders collection '05 - rave ]

Dear Diary,

its getting harder to breath.

Caspian slices into me again and I feel like there is very little left in me. My life is disappearing, and there is nothing I can do about it. What I hate about it the most is that there is no one else here. Everyone else has fallen by the blade, and only Caspian and myself remain. I wonder what will come of all of this.

because I am not backing down from a fight.

Even if I have blood dripping down all the places that I dont want it too. I could moan and whine all I want, but that wasnt going to stop Caspian from taking another swipe at me. I knew his intentions, and he knew mine.

This was no longer a battle of wits or wills.

This was a war.

A war that I needed to win, because I was not ready to die quite yet. I wanted to see my mother again, and tell everyone in the district to kiss my ass. I wanted to make it farther than Mario did, which I knew would probably be physically impossible at this point, but damn it, I wanted it. I wanted to win.

I wanted a better life for myself.

---

I think about everything leading up to this point, and I wonder if this was fates way of telling me that I was never untouchable. Just because I had already suffered and lost, did not mean I would be exempt from it again.

I just didnt think that my life would be forfeit right now.

I am scared, I cannot lie about that. But that does not stop my hand from holding onto my weapon. That does not stop me from mustering up enough strength to keep on standing.

I am not the weak girl that everyone thought I was back home. I was a misunderstood creature that could take everything into her own hands.

Thats what I wanted to prove, even right now, to Caspian.

I look at him with somber eyes and give him a light smile. I am in so much pain, but I am strong, and I will do what it takes to push past it.

I will be victorious, and that is what I have to tell myself over and over again.

"Ill tell you when Ive had enough Caspian." I am able to speak clearly, not afraid of what might come. I cant be afraid, I know that now.

I have to keep going. "I hope you will do the same."

My weapon feels tight in my hand as I stand.

"Im going to finish this." I feel light for a moment and then as heavy as concrete falling through gravity.

My will to live is stronger than ever.

Love,
Daisy

[ saunders collection '05 - rave ]