the hardest of {hearts} [blitz; dars]

Sephera Greene .

You're never gonna love me, so what's the use?
What's the point in playing a game your gonna lose?
Lies, don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh
I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh

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Main, Emphasis, Speaking

For a change, Sephera actually found herself in a great mood. She hadn't felt this happy in a very long time, and the culprit of her cheer was none other than the boy that was, at first, the main cause of distress, also none as Jamarion Goravich. What had happened between the two of them, it was something that she didn't even realize she wanted until it was happening. The thirst for more that she kept getting when she was near him, and all along, her body was aching for that. For something it had never, ever ached for before. It wasn't a planned thing, it wasn't like she wanted o go there simply to have sex, it had just happened. The familiar feel of soft fur rubbing itself against her feet was something she looked forward to. Buckle was still being punished for running away, though. No affection for him. He was beginning to make her feel that he was truly sorry for his actions, though, so she awarded him with an occasional scratch behind the ears, but he still begged for more.

Sanding in the kitchen, attempting to cook, which was going rather well until Buckle came in to disturb her. She turned to him, and bent over so that she was closer. "Nope, you are still in trouble," she smirked. "Now, you know your not supposed to be in the kitchen." Her scolding was interrupted by a fierce knock on the door. She strolled over, delighted to have company for a change, and her jaw dropped as the large wooden door revealed the prize on the other side. "Jamarion!" She said it as if she were a second grader trying to be the first to answer a question the teacher asked, meaning she was overly excited, and not completely sure she was right, as she'd so quickly answered. No, this was definitely him, standing in front of her. Buckle ran out from between her feet, more excited to greet him than she was.

Sephera Greene .

You're never gonna love me, so what's the use?
What's the point in playing a game your gonna lose?
Lies, don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh
I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh

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Main, Emphasis, Speaking

As she stood there, she realized she'd neglected to invite him in. Wait, should she invite him in? Why shouldn't she? She was, after all, falling for him. Wait. Was that the truth? Was she really falling for him. A smile found her lips, because she realized she was. As crazy as it sounded, she actually liked Jamarion Goravich. It was ridiculous, why would she like him? Her mother used to always say that you can't help the people you fall in love with. She'd never understood this until now, when she was standing in her doorway, observing her kitten cuddle with the boy. It shouldn't have been a very big surprise, the two had already done things that couples did all of the time. They'd fought, they'd kissed, and yes, they'd even went, perhaps too far.

As if he could read her mind, Jamar quizzed her about weather of not he was going to be granted entrance to her home. She quickly sidestepped, and, still grinning, allowed the boy to walk in. He had his back turned to her, but she spoke again anyway. "Um, I was just making some pasta, if you wanted some..." Why was she being so nice? He was going to think she was being weird! Also, why hadn't she tidied up the place a bit this morning? Sure, it was a large home, so it basically looked empty all of the time, but still, it could be cleaner.

Sephera Greene .

You're never gonna love me, so what's the use?
What's the point in playing a game your gonna lose?
Lies, don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh
I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh

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Main, Emphasis, Speaking

His quick response made her utter a slight laugh. She rolled her eyes and motioned for him to follow her. "Boys." The look on his face when she peered over her shoulder only made her laugh again. She was right, though. People always said girls were complicated, but Jamarion was one of the most complex things she'd ever seen. Or maybe it was only what she felt for him that was complicated. Something was, she knew that for sure. Once in the kitchen, the aroma of the sauce was completely clear. She took in a lung full of the stuff as she walked across the kitchen. Why had this boy changed the way she felt? Why had he turned her into somebody that held promise, and hope? What was in him that wasn't in others? Nobody knew. Not her, not him, nobody.

She filled a bowl with the sticky pasta, and slid it over to him. The counter was at least clean enough to not have anything that changed the course of the bowl, so she saw that as a positive. She wanted to kiss him again, but she decided she could try to contain herself at least a little. Out of the handful of times she'd seen him, something insane happened with each encounter. First a fight between the two of them, then a fight with them on the same side, then a kiss, the sex. Honestly, she was scared of what came next. Too scared to try and find out just yet. Still, her feet carried her closer to him. "So, you came all this way just to see if I was cooking?" Why had he come? It wasn't that she didn't want him there, but why? Maybe he liked her too. It would certainly explain his being there.

Sephera Greene .

You're never gonna love me, so what's the use?
What's the point in playing a game your gonna lose?
Lies, don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh
I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh

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Main, Emphasis, Speaking

Yet another step that her feet demanded she take, but her mind fought against. What was it that her body wanted so badly that her mind was too terrified to realize? It wasn't like she hadn't already shared everything with this boy, he was standing in her house, eating her food, and few days after the day she'd given her innocence. Only a few feet away from him now, close enough for her hand to do what she was begging it not to do. It clung to his shirt, keeping it's position on the heated surface of his strong torso a few seconds before playfully pulling it in, as if she were a fishing rod and she'd just caught herself a keeper. Heavy breath after heavy breath fell from her mouth, and her pulse began to pound in her temple as he came closer and closer to her. His lips, already parted. Sure, it was probably because he was famished, but she liked the idea of him being just as hungry for her as he was for the bowl in his hands.

Feeling his hot breath on her skin sent chills down the back of her neck. She could no longer resist what her body was begging for. Yearning for the touch of his lips against her own. It was all her body wanted, and all she could do to keep it satisfied. This kiss was different from the others she'd shared with him. It felt for sweet, more kind. Not heated and lustful, which, although she enjoyed, had proven to make things go further than they needed to in the past. No, this was enough to keep her body contained, and enough to keep her sane.

Sephera Greene .

You're never gonna love me, so what's the use?
What's the point in playing a game your gonna lose?
Lies, don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh
I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh

-----------------------------

Main, Emphasis, Speaking

The kiss was amazing, it reminded Sephera of silk being slid across her skin, so gentle, soft, and yet so fragile. It could tear away at the slightest indication, and it so happened that Jamarion's protest was what ripped the smooth fabric that gave her an unfamiliar sensation. Wait? What for? Was something more than this going to happen? Her heart began to beat fast, and her mind raced back to the day at his house. When things had so quickly turned into something Sephera never even considered wanting to do. Was that was in store with this visit? Was that why he'd truly come to see her? Could he really do that? She didn't see him doing that kind of thing. Jamarion was brutal, but but he as just as starved for romance as she was, and the feelings Sephera got when she was with him, like the ones she felt when kissing him, she knew he felt them too. Either that, or he was a fantastic actor.

She felt her breath alter, and she quickly stepped away from him, terrified of what he meant. "First?" She couldn't let herself say anything else, because she refused to appear weak. This boy wasn't going to break her, if that's hat his intention was, of course. She kept her jaw clenched, which was helping to keep her nerves in check, still she could feel the faint trembling of her hands, so she occupied them by streaking them through her hair, as if she had a few tangles. "Uh...Sure?" She asked confused. She was probably just jumping to all of the wrong conclusions like she always did. She'd been wrong about Jamarion so far, so the scary thing was choosing if she thought he liked her back or not. What if he really did? What if she ran him off because she accused him of things he didn't even do? Just breath, Sephera.

Sephera Greene .

You're never gonna love me, so what's the use?
What's the point in playing a game your gonna lose?
Lies, don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh
I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh

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Main, Emphasis, Speaking

It wasn't until the boy quizzed her about it that she realized she was, indeed, staring at him. Why was she staring at him? Probably because she had the growing suspicion that he was like all of the boys she heard girls complain about. The ones that only have girlfriends for one reason, and once they refuse to give them what they want, they just throw the girls to the side. To be honest, the whole idea had scared her, and coming to the realization that she and Jamar had something was actually quite scary. With relationships came complications, but with complications came love. Love. The most sought out thing she'd ever heard of, and now that her hand was extended in front of her, reaching to grasp it, she was afraid it might scald her if she didn't let it cool for a little longer.

She tried not to seem as completely ignorant when she spoke this time, knowing that there was a decision she needed to make. Was she going to allow herself to trust him, or treat him like the pile of other hearts she was guilty of breaking? Her own father's, all of the family friends, her friends, her teachers, the list goes on and on. She made herself smile, and as she shrugged her shoulders indifferently she spoke, her mind, at last, made up. "What, can't I look at my boyfriend?" With a deep breath that freed the butterflies from her stomach, she turned to make herself a bowl of food.

Sephera Greene .

You're never gonna love me, so what's the use?
What's the point in playing a game your gonna lose?
Lies, don't wanna know, don't wanna know, oh
I can't let you go, can't let you go, oh

-----------------------------

Main, Emphasis, Speaking

The fact that he hadn't thrown the bowl of pasta at her and bolted for the door was a good sign, maybe he really was in this for something other than a physical relationship. Maybe he wanted to care about her. She knew it would be difficult to get him to truly be himself around her, to open up, but it was just the same with her. Things take time with Sephera. She has to have time for everything. To heal, to love, to forgive, to forget. She knew she wasn't the easiest person in the world to be around, if she was then she might've had a few friends. No, she chose to be alone. She had friends once, she had everything. Now was her chance to have that again. Although scary, she couldn't just let an opportunity to love again. Whether he liked it or not, Jamarion was stuck with her.

Filling her bowl, she walked across the kitchen, and turned to make sure that the boy was following her. Maybe dinner and some TV was a good idea. Was it? She hadn't really been on any many dates. That was something people did, right? She flicked on the screen that sat in front of the leather sectional and plopped down on the far end of it. Her spot. As she observed what she was seeing, she wasn't sure what to do, because it was a Hunger Games rerun. Not of the one Klaus had just won, but the one from, two? No, three years ago, in which Mace Emberstatt had been crowned victor. By the looks of it, there were only eight competitors left, one of which was the fallen lover of Julian Bryze. Wasn't he with Mace now, though? Things like celebrity life confused her too much to try and understand. She looked at Jamarion, not knowing what she would see. Anger? Excitement? Boredom? What was she going to do if Jamarion reacted in a negative way? His brother had only just returned a few days ago from the games, he might still be sensitve about all of it.