Ducky(Duckles) Horsey D10 DONE

Appearance


I have dark brown hair the color of tree bark. I have eyes the color of coffee, which I have only seen once in my life. My eyes are closely set with a small nose right below them. My hands are long and graceful. Each finger is like a mini ballerina in my opinion.

I have dimples on my face from smiling almost all the time. Nobody really takes me seriously because of that. It also doesn't help that I seem easily distracted and don't seem to be listening at some moments.. I can often be seen hugging my mom or one of my siblings. I am thin but not hallowed out from starvation because my family isn't that poor. I am still thin enough to look weak so people do bully me a lot at the District 10 school.

All of my friends tower above me, literally. I am a short 4 feet 8 inches. That's puny for a fifteen-year-old. From my height I can't run fast at all. When you watch me run you would think I was kidding compared to all the other kids.

At my school actually most of the time is through words others say about me which is the bullying. I'm left alone for most of the day then the bullying starts towards the end for some reason. When it does happen I have a group of friends who stand up for me.

After school you would see me go into my parents barn. I would then help out with all the animals. You could also see me hug then and talk to the animals in my calm soothing voice.
"Hush hush little duckling.
You shall be safe
From that nasty world outside.
You will see it is always
much much better
with only me."



Personality


As you may know by now I am always happy. Rarely a frown crosses my face. Because I'm always happy nobody takes me seriously even though I'm quite smart. I am a good student in school and most of the teachers like me. I also love to squeeze onto stuff and hug them. That you may have also guessed by now. I love to latch on to my older sister Cowleena and my older brother Billy. Even though they try and shake me off I still love them. I became attention desperate because of this.

My favorite place to be is in the family barn. The cows and other animals always have time to accept my hugging.

I am also good at seeing places in my mind from words. Often when I'm sad I like to daydream. I tell myself a little story quietly and I try to use as imaginative words. Then I take the place and imagine myself inside it.

I am easy to trust people and can be tricked easily. I should say trusting is the right word. I myself might even go as far to say that i'm gullible. I am truthful though and I never lie. I believe people who lie or manipulate others are evil. Evil isn't the right word I think. Maybe mean? Rude possibly.

You also should have guessed right now that I love to be exact as possible. I could call myself a perfectionist. I like everything to be perfect. If it isn't perfect I have a problem with it.

I get bullied a lot because people think me always smiling and what seems to others to be a short attention span. I actually don't have a short attention span and is normally always listening.. They whisper at me in the hallways of school and I hate that.

I am helpful and kind. I like to give a hand whenever I can. I also can cheer people up some people say. Apparently my smile can make people happier along with making them not take me seriously. People also say I'm funny and make them laugh. I have a large group of friends because of that. They help when I get bullied.

I am going to trust you by telling you what I'm afraid of. Even I don't disclose this information normally. I haven't even told my older sister who I love so much. I am scared of the capitol taking my family away from me. When I'm alone I get scared. I feel as if there is no one in the world when I'm alone. I keep my smile on though because I always know everything is going to get better.


History

I live into a family with five other siblings. I was born with three older siblings and eventually had two others born into my family. Imagine what the house would be like with six kids all of different ages running amuck. Lets just say the house wass always messy.

I have had an easier life in District 10 than most people. There were no deaths in my family that I can remember. I was born into a little house by the District Square. My mother was so happy when I was born. Nobody knew if I was going to live because I was a very sickly baby. Eventually I got better from whatever malady I had. We were never starving in my house. We always had enough money from all of the family working the family farm.

I have a few other siblings who like to ignore me whenever they can. They also always felt the need to fight umong each other. Around when I was 10 was when I started to love hugging people whenever I can. No one had any time for me so I became attention desperate. Even my own mother and father I rarely saw except at the dinner table. They always are working in their barn from my perspective.

On one day at school when I was nine years old people started to bully me. Luckily I had a large group of friends who helped me when this happened. My group kept building and building because I became friends with more people because I'm friendly and helpful.



Codeword: Odair

Hi Puppy! This is a great foundation; I think it needs a bit of tweaking before I can accept it however.

First off, I would really like you to add more information about her physical appearance, focusing on specifics like the nose, the eyes, the mouth, the hands - elaborate on what makes her look happy. Also, I'd like to see some appearance flaws as well. In addition, there isn't a codeword in this bio so I can't accept it right now :[


I think the personality is a bit more of a problem - however, Ducky does have a complex personality. I see that Ducky is:

- gullible
- extremely sensitive
- perfectionist
- tries to be happy
- empathetic and kind
- always trying to make other laugh
- clingy
- honest
- creative
- strong sense of right and wrong; everything is black and white. Idealistic.
- is seen as a bit ditzy and dumb, which causes the bullying.

The main problem I see here is that the wording can be a bit confusing. Thus, at times it contradicts itself. Ducky says she's literally always smiling but at the same time she cries at the slightest provocation and gets really easily irritated if something isn't perfect.

What you're trying to say is not being expressed well in this wording, and bios are created in order for a) you to have a good grasp of the character and b) for others to understand how your character ticks. I think you just have to change up the sentence structure and use less black and white wording (ex: She's always like this)

Also, I'm not sure how Ducky smiling all the time causes her to be bullied, mainly because it's not because of the smile that she's bullied but because of what people think of her smiles. Why does her smile make her seem dumb? It can't just be her smile - what is her demeanor like? Is she easily distracted? Does she ask seemingly obvious questions in class?

I'm sorry, I know it's frustrating, but if you make the personality section easier to read and understand, I know that not only other readers but also you will have a better comprehension of how Ducky ticks and will be able to write her much better.

Much better! I just need you to add the codeword and one or two more appearance flaws and then I can accept her^^