Meredith Eden Clove-Sawyer | District 7 {FIN}

Meredith Eden Clove-Sawyer
Age— eighteen.
District— Seven.
—odair.
fc: marinet matthee
keep me from the cages
under the control
running in the dark
to find east of eden.

♕

.:Personality:.

I've learned to accept my fate the way it stands. I can't say that I wasn't exactly frightened anymore, as I used to be. In my earlier stages, I was a mess of emotions, one's that even I am perplexed as to how I could contain. Everything I had dreamed for was to live forever, and that was the only thing that mattered. As I grew older, I've come to learn the obvious, no one lives forever. No one. One could do anything in the world they could in their will to live forever and ever, only to prove their ignorance in the end. I refuse to pretend like anything that could be done could benefit me in accord to my limited years. I am prepared for my fate. I am prepared for death to be waiting for me at the end of this all, and I will embrace him with open arms.

Compassionate. Kind. Confident. Selfless. Empathetic.
Anyone that truly knew me would describe me in such words. Some would say that my presence could clear a cloudy sky, shining in the radiant sunlight that hid underneath. "Be kind and considerate to all, you never know what they may be going through." I was always told, even such a very tender age to be genuine and kind to everyone. It was common sense though, to be treated with respect one must be respectful, and that is something I live and stand by. Courageous. I am brave, and anything below it will not suffice. My very morals are intact and I hold myself to higher than a poor, dying girl that expects pity. I am not open to pity from anyone, some tell me this is not good, that everyone needs someone to sympathize with them, but I don't care. I refuse to be seen as someone who needs sympathy on something that I've come to make ends with.

Goodbyes, to me, are something that are said when you're unsure and frightened of the future to come. Goodbyes mean that something is coming to an end, something special. I had the tendency to never say goodbye, I was certain of the future, well at least mine. Good day and goodnight manage to slip off of my tongue, but never a goodbye. However, I'd been saying my goodbyes ever since the day I was diagnosed, but they are hidden deep beneath the barrier, in the secrecy of my mind. Some people tend to call me mysterious and secretive, keeping my true thoughts buried deep within. Some people say I'm careless and a cavalier, causing ruckus throughout the District with my closest friends. Truth be told, I'm living. Everyday I'm living it up as though the next will be my last. It is never a dull moment when I'm loose and alive. Alive is what I am and alive is what I shall be, until I am no more.

—

.:Appearance:.

"It's as though the stars hide deep within your electric blue eyes. At the very moment of your birth it was as though the moon's radiant light kissed your dark brown hair. Your rosy-pale skin is truly tinted by thousands of fresh rose petals." My hair is naturally straight, it flows down to my lower mid-back. It was seemingly perfect, however it holds the annoying tendency to frizz and wave in different sections. I found it difficult to hide all the wisps from surfacing and showcasing themselves, and it was something I absolutely hated.

My head is definitely more squared, my semi-masculine jawline being one of my more prominent, and noticeable features. My lips lay almost flat upon my face, added a light plush to them, they are pink and pale, hiding my teeth underneath. I've never been a huge fan of my pearls, as they aren't straight with each other, or at least how I see them. My eyes are equivalent in size and sit proportionally, they are spread evenly apart, and they sit about less than an inch below my eyebrows. My eyebrows are pointed at their peaks and form an almost perfect arch, following the trim of the bone beneath mostly, however they trail off coarse towards the middle to the ending point. My build is about the average size for a female, standing five feet, five inches tall. I weigh in at about a hundred and twenty-something pounds, it was less than expected of a district seven citizen, but I'm not usually working in the woods to become very muscular, and it fit all proportionally. I may lack in physical muscle, but I am strong enough to handle myself if anything comes to it.

—

.:History:.

I was born from the purity of gold, held delicately in my parents very own arms as they offered me the world. Being the great granddaughter of the president of various successful companies, that were prominent throughout District Seven, I hold the blood of authority & leadership, and it's coursing through my veins. For the first few years of my life were the ones full of excitement, joy and carelessness. My life and everything was extravagant back then, when we used to have all the money our hearts could desire, oh how that has changed. Old-money ran through our family blood, through generations and generations of my great greats successful businesses. It didn't bother me how we went from so much wealth to moderate. For I didn't seek to be financially better than anyone else, and it was for the better. My parents, on the other hand, were bound by their very limbs to get us by, and they always seemed to accomplish it. With the money we received at the first of every month, due to our family businesses, got us through the months, however a portion of it went to treatment. The treatment was held a couple days a week, for the remainder of my life, however to me they were becoming more and more unsuccessful each visit.

Dying. Dying.
I'm not an ignorant one. I know my days are numbered, and a date was already set. It was one that wasn't made specific, but one that was open to a guesstimation and the unknown. "You have exactly— years." The words the doctor spoke were unclear to me, I couldn't bring myself to understand how long that limited time was. I'm terminally ill. I'm dying. I'm vying for life. I'm living. I'm living. I'm breathing. Each breath I took was one to celebrate, or at least one for me to, because one day I would be all out, expired. I'm scared, but I mean who wouldn't be? Knowing that your imminent death was to come, but not knowing exactly when. I guess it's for the better, though, it is better to live life to the fullest, as though the next was your last, than dread the known for ever coming.

There are no winners, and there are no losers in life, just survivors. Surviving is something I'm making my most vigorous attempt at, yet it all seems to be failing. Although I kept my head held high, treating life as though I was the one in control. I've grown to accept and face the fact that death can't be evaded, and I've promised to live my life as someone who could live forever. While everyone was working in the woods, collecting lumber to be transported, I spent my days away from it all. Heading off to secluded woodland area's I would spend hours, days with my friends, just to get away from all of reality. I felt like I could live millions of lives, live for eternity with them, and for that I couldn't possibly thank them anymore for being here for me. I spend a majority of my time with my friends and family, it was the only thing I could ever want in life.

♕

Misc.— #95c489