us, everything ; kieran & paige | soulmates

<sup>| through time and space, i will love you |

╰──╮</sup>  paige emberstatt   ^╭──╯

"Are you sure you're comfortable with this?"

Kieran's fingers around her own feel like a lifeline. Her heart races, slows, she feels as if she's being thrown back into that terrible moment. To become a mother had been its own grueling process, two years of curling in on herself, staring at a wall that seemed to stretch on for miles without end. It had been graceless, it had severed a part of her that at the time felt crucial; but eventually she had walked out of that chaos whole. Lighter, kinder, maternal.

Emerson's birth had been the hardest on her, but with Elonna, and then Eden, it seemed that each leg of the journey her steps had become more careful and sure. Enough to believe, at least briefly, that nothing could ever upset the solid foundation beneath her ever again.

Perhaps it's only natural that Emerson's death would be the hardest thing she will ever have to experience. There is no way to describe it. Being held in the arms of the man you love, the man you have always loved, watching a son that you could have loved better living his final moments behind a television screen. Knowing that despite how loud you scream, how desperately you beg, you are powerless to stop it from happening.

The funeral was weeks ago, she has cried enough tears that she thinks she could name a river after her own suffering. As much as an anchor seems to pull at her, begging her to collapse and give in and sink into that familiar sorrow, she knows she has to stay stable for Elonna and Eden. Taking Kieran up on the offer of a date night is a good first step, but she's hesitant as they stand in the room of flickering neon lights, two pods waiting for them on either side.

"I feel like a horrible person for wanting to step away from reality." She glances at the floor, fights back tears that sting and burn. Her hand lifts on instinct to rest against Kieran's cheek, her love is so, so tangible. "But I'm here with you. In any universe."