georgina garner | d6 | CBD1

I don't know when it first started, the straying glances and taboo touches that left my skin feeling ignited. All I knew was that I craved it, that I drowned myself in it because it made me feel seen and wanted and desired. Well, thats what I told myself when I found myself draped in another arms, the wedding band on my finger ice cold against the searing touch of a man who was not my husband. Bene used to make me feel that way. I can't quite pinpoint the moment things changed, but they had, a permanent break in a relationship that had already been teetering on the edge of unfixable.

But Bene wasn't the only relationship that had broken over the recent years.

A terrible wife and a terrible mother.

Ambition consumed me so thoroughly that I never really learnt how to push it aside to become the mother that my kids wanted- needed.

I tried. When they were younger they were the center on my world, I would have done anything for them- or so thats what I used to tell myself late at night when I found myself feeling empty, like a part of me had been torn away from me the moment I pushed my work to the side to be what they needed.

It was what a good mother was supposed to do right?

So why couldn't I?