A study of humanity + Theo&Hornet + (95th-96th)

May 3rd, year of the 95th

Dear Journal,

I took the long way home today. The route that entangles me into the maze of district one’s small alley ways and streets that lead to nowhere. Some of the girls at the academy looked at me with worried eyes as I waved goodbye for the night heading in an unknown direction, not once speaking a word. The false worry in their eyes disgusts me, for if they really cared then they would have chased after me.

No one ever chases after me. Therefor I believe that no one actually cares. Just as well, for there is not a thread in my heart that tugs away at my feelings for the girls from the academy. I would have not a problem killing any one of them. A little bit of poison dripped into their drinks when they are not looking perhaps. Just a few more years in the hopes I would never have to spend my entire day with them ever again.

The lights over on birch street were flickering. I take this route every week, noting down the notable occurrences that I later try to decipher but this I did not forget. The list now goes as follows.

8th of December 94th – Lessing Ave. lights are out – no repairs have been made
19th of December 94th – Kallowitz Str. Lights flicker – some have gone out but not all
21st of January 95th – Roberts Ln.- lights are well but I have found luna moths – samples have been taken for my collection.
30th of January 95th – Prostitutes found on Charleston Rd. - must have moved to throw of peacekeepers
14th of February 95th – Notably more flowers discarded in trash bins than usual – A few good finds for my collection
9th of March 95th – Almost certain I saw a drug deal on Kallowtz str. – lack of light must make it lucrative
23rd of March 95th- I added the streets behind restaurants to my list. Where they throw out food, I am certain to find bugs for my collection. I must remember to bring sample bags
04th of April 95th – All lights on Kallowitz Str. Have gone out – eyes need time to adjust
20th of April – Couple had a screaming match on Finch str. – I think the woman hit him – good for her.
3rd of may, 95th – Birch street lights flicker. Also I am certain I have spotted someone dragging a body in a black trash bag. Only around 97% sure it was a body.

I contemplate bringing my list to Eurydice, then I decide against it. My observations are not to report crime, because if you report it…the problem will go away. There is something about May 3rd that solidified my idea that if I am to one day rise to the top, I need to understand the worst of the worst. The girls who sell their body’s, the hopelessness of a junkie looking for their next fix, what drives a man to treat his wife like a punching bag. Most importantly, what pushes a person to murder and how does the brain function of someone who can cover it up. What steps are needed to be taken?

I paused my walk home today. In fact, I even took a detour.

As I saw the man drag what I presume to be a body, I melted back into the dark shadows hoping the light would not reflect of my eyes (I might need sunglasses next time). Holding my breath, letting it escape my lips when he himself made noise. I do not think he intended to have an audience, but I was not expecting to find something worth watching. Something worth observing, a task that I am consumed by.

Once he was finished, I remained on his tail. Following him carefully from a distance as he navigated himself back towards the busy population of district one. I am uncertain if he saw my face. For a brief second, I may have caught his eye. It was only polite to smile, a moment so brief he could have never known what I had witnessed before.

Perhaps tomorrow I would return to the square where I had left him. Something tells me, our paths would cross again. The dark alley ways are not for the faint of heart, but I think I finally found a person worth my while.