Black Math {open}
Jul 9, 2011 0:53:26 GMT -5
Post by Cel on Jul 9, 2011 0:53:26 GMT -5
Today was not a good day.
Yesterday was worse.
It was a cold day, the day after the Reaping. There was a slight drizzle. Not enough to constitute rain, but certainly enough to soak most coats through. Azu knew this, and hadn't even bothered to wear a coat.
There isn't any point; I'm just going to get soaked anyways.
So Azu walked down the street, moisture soaking through her black tee, and collecting on her arms, which were at this point merely cold goose flesh. Really, she should at this point by suffering from hypothermia. She actually would have, but this was prevented by tightening the grip around the round rubber capsules of heated oil she had in her pockets. Technically, it was probably illegal for her to have them, but the refinery she worked for was large enough that it wouldn't miss the half-litre of liquid she had used.
Azu had taken this walk since her twelfth birthday. It was her way of remembering the tributes for her district. She wasn't typically this sentimental, but when she got emotional about something, but when she did, it was a deep, lasting emotion. That was what she got from the Games: a melancholy feeling that was reflected when she practiced what she called "black math"-- calculating the probabilities of any given person being in the Games. It brought out feelings that she tried to avoid- feelings that, in order to keep herself happy, she had kept deep within her subconcious. Memories of her unscarred mother and father, memories of the boy that had been her best friend. She almost cried.
You were never much for words, but I think this rain is for you.
Azu looked to the sky, which was darkening, and threatening rain. It wouldn't be a good idea to stay in the open for much longer. Oil could only keep her warm for so long. Still, it felt right to stay out here, the cold biting at her extremities, the cold goose flesh on her arms.
You went through so much worse.
Keeping her eyes on the sky, and periodically brushing her wet bangs out of her eyes, Azu walked calmly towards a small area underneath a decrepit old refinery, where several people were already waiting for the storm to pass. She moved past one of them-- she wasn't even looking at their faces at this point, and moved towards a small ledge that looked unoccupied. Pulling herself onto it, she sat cross-legged, and closed her eyes, dwelling on the day. Mostly, she though about the obscenity of sending children to slaughter. Typically, she conversed with herself under her breath, but this wasn't a particularly good idea with other people around. No need to cause trouble.
Two people were dead, as of today. I knew them, of course. In a District like Nine, all the kids at least knew of each other. I didn't particularly for them, though. It's more the principal of it. You see, I believe that any given person's life ought to be their own. It really is deplorable what the Capitol has done.
Azu shuddered and squeezed the oil capsules tighter. It seemed like the cold was finally getting to her. This foray back into reality brought her to think about how close she might have been to being in the Games. It was bringing her closer to the Black Math.
Ultimately, it was quite unlikely for me to get Reaped (the odds are approximately one in a thousand for me, a bit worse for my brothers, and quite a bit better for my little sister, by the way), but that didn't stop me, or anybody else, for that matter, from worrying the subject to death. Hell, this was the first year in several that I hadn't taken out tesserae. The odds were looking up, and that was something, because the odds never look up. And yet, I couldn't shake the feeling that the ticket pulled could have just as easily been mine. I had been only inches from the Reaped girl's face. She was my age. The look on her face, the sweat coming off her body, the evasiveness that plagued the people she walked past on her way to the stage, like a criminal heading for the gallows. At that moment, her odds became a hundred percent, and every other girl in the District's became zero. It was horrible. Her face reminded me of my own, a few years back. There were worse things that could happen to a person than being Reaped, but not many. I thought that I may have been through one of them. Her face made me feel that perhaps I was wrong.
A cold breeze briefly broke into Azu's reverie. She was shivering something awful at this point, and had pulled her knees up to her face, in an effort to conserve warmth. It briefly passed her mind that perhaps it really shouldn't have been this cold in July. Really, her issue was that at this point she was on the verge of hypothermia. She was getting delirious, and may have nodded off a couple of times. The wind brought her back to this situation. Not fully, but enough for her to take some of the aforementioned actions. On her exterior, she was a slightly ruffled, visibly cold teenage female. Inside, she was starting to lose control of her emotions. The delirium was bringing her to a place that she had rarely visited. Add to that the melancholy state that she was in, and the cocktail of hormones that was adolescence, and you could comfortably call her momentarily insane. She was still thinking now, but it was a bit less clear.
I'm not sure where I am.
They appear so distant, those people.
It gradually dawns on me that I must be asleep.
This probably isn't a good state to be in with the wind and rain at this time.
My vision is blurred, and the ground I'm standing on seems like it's moving. Definitely not good.
I can see a figure walking towards me, looking a bit ruffled. He's young, and looks to be about...
It dawns on me.
I'm on the ground, and I have no idea how I got there. I look up at him.
Ka...
I blacked out shortly afterwards
They appear so distant, those people.
It gradually dawns on me that I must be asleep.
This probably isn't a good state to be in with the wind and rain at this time.
My vision is blurred, and the ground I'm standing on seems like it's moving. Definitely not good.
I can see a figure walking towards me, looking a bit ruffled. He's young, and looks to be about...
It dawns on me.
I'm on the ground, and I have no idea how I got there. I look up at him.
Ka...
I blacked out shortly afterwards
Azu lost her balance and fell of the ledge, sprawling on the cold concrete ground. She shivered violently, and hit her head on the ground. She wasn't that far off from being totally unconcious, but her oil had a small area of her heated. Her vision was dazed, and she now knew the meaning of seeing stars. She still saw the figure in front of her, though at this point she wasn't sure whether it was male or not.
No, this wasn't turning out a good day at all...
