all this and {heaven} too // mew;blitz

Someone told me once but a lot of people tell me a lot of things and half the time i'm going too fast to let it sink in that rhythms must run through my veins in place of blood, and although I can't remember who said it or when I know that I must have agreed with them with a smile as bright as the sun I've only seen a handful of times, because in a world where something as simple and plain as the truth is so hard to come by that one statement is as good as gospel. And that gospel truth is what I prove now, sending the walls of my room shuddering with every pulse of a kick drum heart that sends rapidfire energy circulating through arms hands and sticks and bleeding out over the surface of a drum kit that has felt the impact of every swirling half-thought that rushes and writhes and screams for release. Sometimes i can never stop and it makes the whole world awful and beautiful at the same time all of these little pieces just build and build, and while peace is a word I've never truly known I still don't feel quite right until I can bask in the absolution of beats so intricate that for a few blissful minutes, I can lose myself.

Buzz.

It's by pure luck that I take a beat or two rest the exact second the doorbell goes off, or I'd have never heard it. Still, the fact that there's someone ringing the doorbell at all is enough to prompt a raised eyebrow (Mom and Dev are both out doing something they told me what it was but i wasn't paying enough attention to remember and it was all carried away on the beat and Ophelia just barges right in whenever she feels like it) as I toss my sticks onto the unmade surface of my bed, stretching as I get up and poke my head out into the hallway.

Buzz.

Something in the back of my head registers my appearance as I pass the framed mirror in the hallway - hair mussed, face flushed, all those things that come with going at a drum set nonstop for over an hour - and briefly think of taking a second to make myself presentable but taking a second for anything is out of the question because they fly by too fast for me to catch them before shrugging the notion off with a noncommittal 'meh' and yanking the door open.

Holy hell. Really, of all the times I could have listened to my gut and taken two damn seconds to look decent, this has to happen. Of course I would open the door and there would be an unidentified, extremely attractive guy standing there it's so much easier now to just admit to myself that my heart has different allegiances than other people's and i guess i have ro to thank for that even though he kind of sort of crushed my soul in the process looking at me like I'm some kind of alien. He's slightly familiar, a wiry silhouette of dark curls and even darker eyes, but in a District this size everyone's seen everyone at least once (I try not to let myself think about how if I run into him again I'll be that kid who answered his door looking like he just ran a marathon). So maybe my mind isn't the most functional never is never was never will be, but I find myself scrambling for something, any sort of decent introduction that might cover the fact that I'm usually a bundle of stammering run-on sentences and flaws that no one can seem to get over.

You'd have thought I'd be over chasing down acceptance in a world that doesn't want to give it to me.

"Um... Hi?"

ooc - SORRY THIS WASN'T BLITZ. RAMBLING JACE LIKES TO RAMBLE. FEEL FREE TO BLITZ YOUR POSTTTT