{it's too late to say sorry} yaa vs mik

As I lent forward to attack her, my foot caught something sharp and a grunt of surprise slipped from my lips, causing me to fall forwards, only grazing the side of her arm. Screwing my face up I look down at my foot to see a harpoon stuck through it, poking out to the other side. I was in shock. I couldn’t believe it. A bloody harpoon was sticking out of my foot. A silent creamed filled my lips and I scrambled down to reach my foot, tearing the stupid thing away. Ouch. Ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch. Blood pooled around the sole of my boots and I was tempted to pull them off, but I thought better of it, limping to the side, leaning my body against a piece of bamboo.

My eyes flashed to Yaa’s. Her face was filled with rage and I had to suppress a smile. This is what I needed, someone to look just as enraged as I felt. She told me that I couldn’t blame her, that it wasn’t her fault. Ha. Yeah. Not her fault. She could of helped me, she could of helped kill the girls she only cared about. A snarl slipped onto my lips and I could feel my anger stirring up again. It wasn’t until this moment that I realised how much of a bitch this girl could be. On the outside she seemed so gentle- but yet to strong, so beautiful. But the words that fell from her lips were not the words I would expect to hear from the girl that I had spent so much time with in these games. She called me an idiot, someone who was just trying to par the guilt of to someone else- and she may have been right, but the anger inside me did not stop cursing through my veins, it only grew stronger.

She told me to piss off before screeching at me that I was an asshole. Well I sure was a lot of things today. I think dully as more words dribbled from her lips. I knew this was a competition, and I knew that people were going to die- people that I grew close to where going to die- but that didn’t mean I was ready for it, that I would be able to handle it. I had lost so much, so many people, and Andy was just one more person to add to the list. But I still felt it, I was still able to feel him gone, gone forever. And it hurt, and I knew that if my mind was thinking straight that half the words that fell from my lips would never have. But I was angry, I was hurting, and this girl, this girl was only making things so much worse.

But it wasn’t until she had nearly reached the end of her speech when I really got angry. Victim? How was I acting like a victim? We were all victims. So what difference am I too her? Yes I was a victim, a victim of the capitol, but I sure was not acting like one, I was acting like a boy who had just lost someone they loved, I was acting like a boy who was pissed off, annoyed, and angry. Not a victim. A victim would be crying and sobbing, begging for mercy, and I was not. I did not need her mercy. I did not need anything from her.

I think back to yesterday, to when she tried to help me with my wounds from the man eating moss and I felt disgusted. She was helping my sorry ass? What about her? When she had lost her hand, I did not have to help her out, I did not have to stitch her up, but I did. My sorry ass, my bum.

My body began to shake. I had never felt this angry before- never in my whole life. I wanted her to shut up. I didn’t want to hear any more of what she had to say, nothing at all. Her hand flew into her pack where she grabbed something out and chucked it at me. I took a step back as small bugs went flying at me, pincers ready to dig into my skin. I didn’t scream or make a fuss, that’s what she wanted, me to flail around screaming. Well news flash, I was not going to flail around like an animal. Slapping the bug away I held back a moan. Some of their little pincers had clung to my skin, making a shot of sudden pain shoot through my arm. “Stupid bugs,” I mumble under my breath.

“Bugs? That’s all you’ve got?” I ask, one of my eye brows shooting up. I made my voice sound almost bored as I stared at her. “Come on sweetheart, you have to do more than bugs if you want to go home.” I mock, picking up the harpoon that was still coated with my blood. “Bugs ain’t gonna get you know where, you saw Locust, she fell. Bugs don’t win. They lose.” As soon as I said Locust I felt guilt rip through me. I knew that I had crossed a line- not with Yaa- but with my own personal boundaries. I should not have talked about Locust like that. She had been another human being, just like me, and it was totally out of line to talk about her like this. She deserved respect. It was wrong to use my anger in this way, so, so very wrong. “But Locust was strong. She was so strong, one of the strongest people in this whole arena. She knew, you know, she knew that this would happen, even when I told her that I would not hurt you, not again. I had meant it. Well I thought I had meant it. I guess I had been wrong too. So why Yaa? Why didn’t you side with her? Why didn’t you help her take me down, kill me? You knew I was unstable, that I could just break at any moment and Turn on you instead, but you didn’t attack me. Why?”

But I didn’t wait for an answer. Readying the harpoon in my hands, I aimed the blade at her. My face twisted, full of anger, full of hurt- full of so many different emotions. “Be strong Yaa. Take. Me. Down.”

[attacks Yaa: Harpoon]
[dice=200+3000]
[Shallow Cut on Stomach -- 4.0 damage]

[dice=16]
[miss]
[dice=16]
[miss]

“That’s not what I asked! Didn’t ask why you didn’t attacker her, I asked why you didn’t attack me. What stopped you from sliding that blade of yours across my throat then? What’s different from then, that’s different from now?” I ask, taking a pace closer to her, dropping my voice so she could just hear it over the howling of the wind, the raging of the rain. I wanted to know- I needed to know. I didn’t know why all of a sunned I had the desire to know, but I did, and it would not go away.

Anger still raged through me, powering though my veins making the chill of the day dampen. I was hot, sweating even. I hated the way she looked at me, like I was an enemy- even though I was- I still didn’t want her to look at me like he wanted to rip me throat out. I know I must not look that different from herself, but still, I wanted to see a glimpse of that girl, that one who I had stitched up when she needed me, that girl who had been so stubborn, so cheeky to Diemos, that girl would smile- even when our worlds were crumbling around us… but maybe, maybe I had just been imagining that girl… maybe this whole games was just one big illusion. No. No it couldn’t have been. The way I had felt towards Andy had been real. The pain as a blade slices through my body had been real. It was all real, and I knew I was going to die.

Yaa was a strong girl, someone who knew how to take care of herself. I had seen her in battle, she was ferocious, talented with her blade. She was someone I should be scared of. But I wasn’t. I didn’t feel fear when I looked at her, only anger, only rage, regret and pity. She was not the same person I had met on day one. But neither was I the same person. We were both killers, we were both people trying to fight our way to the end. Only one of us was going to come out of this alive and I wanted to be that one.

“I am a liar, I guess you found that out today. Always have been, always will be. I lied to you, I lied to Locusts. I broke that promise I made, but aren’t promises around to be broken?” I barely look at her this time, not wanting to see anything that would swim in the beautiful features of her face. I didn’t want to know anything else about her, I didn’t want to hear her soft voice, I wanted her gone, I wanted to be free from her. I wanted to be free. “I’m sorry things have to come down to this. But people will do whatever it takes to survive.”

[attacks Yaa: sword]
[dice=200+1000]
[Deep Gash on Forehead -- 9.0 damage]

“You’re going to have to do better than that, sweetheart. I said take me down!”

[attacks Yaa: sword]
[dice=200+1000]
[Shallow Cut on Left Shoulder -- 3.5]


tiger
[dice=21]

panji
[dice=13]

That was it, the last straw. Yaa swang her pointy stick at me. I thought I had made it away, I thought I had dodged her attack… but how wrong I was. I felt as though a raging hot fire had been released up on me. A screamed filled my lips and I did not hold back one little bit. I let it free. Falling to the ground I trying to clutch at the stump at my hip. The pain that ran though me was something that I had never experienced before, something that I never want to experience again. Tears fill my eyes and I don’t hold back, I let them fall. I let them race down my cheeks; I let them fall to the earth that surrounded me.

Whimpering to myself I try to hold my leg. Try to hold the stump at my hip that used to have a leg connected to it. It was gone, it no longer existed. Screeching in pain I forget about the fight at hand, lost in my own little world of pain, own little wold where nothing but me and myself existed. It was a world where I didn’t want to be, a world I wanted to get away from. But I couldn’t- I couldn’t pull free, I couldn’t escape. All I could think of was the pain that spread through me like fire, filling my veins, filling my whole body until I was almost positive that if you looked hard enough you would be able to see heat radiating off my broken body.

“AHHHHHH! FUCK! I CAN’T FEEL MY LEG! I CANT FEEL- UGH FUCK MY LEG. MY LEG. MY LEG IT. AHHH!” My screams fill the air. Louder than the rain. Louder than the howling of the angry wind. I wanted my leg back- I wanted it to be attached to my body. Pain ripped through me, and I could hardly breathe.

Finally I manage to push through the pain enough to see Yaa standing over me. She held her blade in one hand and all I could think of was wanting the pain to end, wanting it to go away, go away for ever. “Yaa, I am so sorry about all the things I have said, but please, please kill me. Kill me now. It hurts, it hurts so much, please, please make it stop.” I beg trying to crawl over to her so that I could look her in the eyes. But as soon as I made a move to crawl over to her I was hit with a wave of fresh pain and an animalistic cry fled though my lips. I arched my back, my fingers clawing at the mud beneath me. Mud dug deeper and deeper under my nails until it became extremely uncomfortable and I concentrated on that, instead of the pain of my leg. I hadn’t even looked at it, at my leg, that would be lying a few feet away. I couldn’t bring myself to look at it, I just couldn’t.

I turned my eyes back to Yaa again, my eyes bloodshot and glassy from the tears that had fallen not even a few minutes earlier. “End me now, please, please. I want it to go away, all of it to go away. Please… I hurt, I hurt so much… please… please make it go away.” I whimper to her, clutching my sword tighter.

[attacks Yaa: sword]
[dice=200+1000]
[Deep Gash on Forehead -- 9.0 damage]

[Mace trap (for the post above can't edit it in atm so I'll put it in this post.]
[dice=16]
[bruise on jaw, 3.0]

She struck me again and I felt my skin spilt open. I felt the pain surge through my body and I hold back another grunt of pain. I tried to suppress the tears that threatened to slide down my face, but the pain was excruciating. Don’t cry. Come on, you have to hold back, you have already shown her how weak you could be. But I had just lost a leg- my whole leg. A leg that I relied on, a leg that had been connected to me, been a part of me. Now it was gone, now I only had a stump that was bleeding heavily and was excruciating.

I watch as more blood gushes from my wounds. Skin that had once been an olive colour was no longer visible. Blood and dirt coated me- even the rain could not wash away all the blood that blanketed my body. But is was not only blood that was leaking out of my body it was life too- life and strength. Once, a few days ago, I would come out of a fight with barley a scratch, but now, now I come out bruised and battered and butchered. It just showed how weak, how close I was to finally losing this life, this energy, which I clung too.

Why bother holding on? Why bother? I was in pain- a pain that I would no longer feel if I was to let her- Yaa- take my life. But I couldn’t not matter how much I wanted this to end, I could not let this girl be the one to take my life. I didn’t know why, I didn’t know why I couldn’t allow her to take it, I just knew that I would to everything I could not to let her. She had been one I had trusted, my ally, now she was my enemy, now it was her time to die.

I feel disgust rise within me at the thought of me begging for her to kill me. How could I have been so stupid. It was the pain, it was the pain- that’s why I begged her to kill me. If I had been thinking straight, well straighter, those words would never have slipped from my lips. Pulling myself together ever so slightly I try to not think of the pain that surged through me. I try to ignore the pounding of my leg, of my arm. I try to zone out, to think of Andy. The whole time he was with me he tried to hide the pain that he was in- if he could do it, I could do it too. Andy was strong- so so strong, but so was I.

Adopting the attitude that felt so familiar to me, I turn back to look at the screaming Yaa. Her face was screwed in anger and I let a small smile slip onto my lips. “Hahahaha” I laugh hysterically, “Just kidding,” I say suddenly scrambling to my feet. Mockery was clear in my voice as I use my sword to push myself up. “Did you really think that I would just let you kill me? Ha. Dun dan that’s where you are wrong.” I say pulling my sword closer to my side. “Have any final words?” I was meant to say the words confidently and easily but as the words touch my lips I tremble. The exact words my sisters killer had said before he sliced her throat open. A shiver slide through my body and I try to regain my posture a sly smirk sliding onto my lips. Pain flared through me but that was the least of my worries at the moment- top priority was getting out of here alive. Weakly I fling my blade towards the girl I no longer recognise.

[attacks Yaa: sword]
[dice=200+1000]
[Severed Left Hand at Wrist -- 9.0 damage]

[Venus Fly]
[dice=5]
[Unsuccessful: trap fails and tribute takes no damage]

[pit]
[dice=17]
[shallow cut on foot, 3.5]