let it rain | the end of drace vandel

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I have grown a lot as a person over the years. Maybe I didn't turn out the way I was supposed to, maybe I made a few mistakes here and there, but I am only human. I am not anything special, just another person brought into a frigid world, so bitter, so fragile, yet so strong. Nobody cares about second place, or third, or seventh, in my case. The world doesn't pay any attention to all the stars until the sun that shines so proudly in the center of a glorious sky has laid its head down to rest. Sure, once it does, once it sees the beauty each and every light brings to us, things will be okay, but the sun hasn't quite set in time for people to notice me. I am a star, not a sun, and I will flicker out before another pair of eyes will ever get to see me shine.

But that's not true, is it? Right now, thousands of eyes watch me, watch as the monster is finally slain and brought to a rest. Some will cry, some will cheer, some simply won't have it in their hearts to care. I don't blame them, any of them. Free will is something I wish I still had, but this arena has taken even that from me. I was sent here to die, wasn't I? Even in the beginning. I was never meant to win this game, yet I was ill enough to keep playing my cards, one after another until I have run out of tricks. Nothing up my sleeve, nothing that my words can fix.

I am going to die.

Through the tears and the blood, the webs so carefully spun that wrapped around every tree, every bush, every vine look like clouds. Maybe they are. Maybe I was already in the sky all along. No, that can't possibly be the answer to my problems, for the sky holds no boundaries. There is no pain, or sorrow, or sadness, only freedom. Right now, I don't feel free, but I am beginning to see that it won't be long before I do.

She had blonde hair. Her eyes were like emeralds, and her smile like summer. She made him feel again. He had forgotten what it was like to feel anything other than pride from his tricks and schemes. She spoke so sweetly to him, so gently and kind, he hadn't expected it. He knew she thought he was crazy- signing up for something so dangerous? That was before she knew, though. It was before she knew that Drace had never played a game he couldn't win. It was before he knew he one day would. "I'm Valencia," She declared, and he realized there had never been a more perfect name to sound in his ears. "It's a pleasure to meet you." It was a pleasure for him, too.

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If I'm not going to win, I wonder who will. Locust, perhaps? I could easily see her taking the crown. Maybe Yaa, or even Opal, who has caused the end of me could win, but I want Xanthus to. He has stood by me, cared for me, and dare I say that he loved me. Through every swing of my blade, every cut of my skin, every quiet tear, Xanthus has been there. Even when I was not, he was. It is a bit sad that I don't get to tell him goodbye after all of his hard work keeping me around. "Opal," I say, and my voice is so weak and fragile that there is a new pain in the pit of my stomach, one that is caused solely by terror. My life is actually going to end. Saying it and feeling it were different. Blood pulsed through my veins so slowly, trying so hard to ignore my brain, and instead, choosing to follow my heart. I need to speak again, and I think maybe I am brave enough to do it. "I- can you.. tell Xanthus..." I pull in a shaky breath of air and wince. Even that hurts me now. "that.. goodbye?" My eyes begin to sting, and tears overflow my eyes. But I can't stop now, I have to ask.

"And Locust, too. She was nice to me." My voice trembles. Why didn't I ever bother to tell her this myself? "And.. if you win," I say, pushing the hurt to the back of my foggy mind. "Tell my sister- tell her I'm so-rry. And Val needs to know.. I love her." I am not finished, but my times grows shorter. "Opal.. I f-forgive you." Then I can no longer see. I feel light, like a feather, or sunlight. I take a single breath through my nose, and the smell of dew is the last thing I notice until everything stops.

I know my kingdom awaits
and they've forgiven my mistakes
and I'm coming home,
I'm coming home
tell the world I'm coming-

Lights. Blinding ones that swallow me whole are all I can see at first. I look at my fingers, a bit surprised that I have them again, and move them back and forth to be sure. I try to breathe, and my chest fills with air- clean, quite lovely, really. A scared feeling- no, not scared, concerned- fills my chest. Where am I? I have never been here, or heard of a place like this, except for in the stories my mother read me as a child. It is supposed to be a good place, from what I remember. Everything is supposed to be better here, and I can already tell it will be. I feel excited, but I don't know what for, really. I look down, taking notice of a simple outfit of a white button-up shirt and matching pants, the ends of which are rolled up. I have no shoes, and the ground is soft.

I begin running around the room I'm in- a seemingly endless one made of white light. I can't see where the floor meets the ceiling, or if there even is a ceiling, but I don't stop. I don't grow tired of running, and with each step I become faster. A picture of Damea laughing flashes through my mind, and I push myself to run faster. I see Valencia, a smile on her face. Dexter and Krisondra standing next to each other, arms crossed with hopeful expressions. I stop when I see my parents. Not in my head like the others, in front of me, arms open in excitement. I run into them, not sure if I will ever be able to let go. But I don't know why I need to worry now. I have them now, forever. And they have me.

Forever.

As I walk with them, more join us. First it is Sierra, once so fragile and broken. She isn't anymore. In fact, she looks perfect. Then there is Cleo, and I am almost overcome with happiness. Each step brings forth a lost soul that has been found here in this place. All of us are together now. Some day Damea will be with us, and we will be the same happy family we once were. And Valencia will be here with us, and Dexter, and Xanthus, and Krisondra, and Locust, and Opal. And we will all have each other.

Forever.
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I'd like to thank everyone who helped me in the process of getting Drace to the final seven. Each and every one of you mean the worlds to me.

Thanks to Python for helping me with literally everything, and explaining things when I didn't understand them. And also for creating the plot Drace was a part of.

Thanks to Kay for also serving as a mentor and helping me out on numerous occasions.

Thanks to Elegant for writing Drace's closest friend in the arena. It means a lot to me.

Thanks to Cass and Tristen for being a part of our alliance, and for being there when I needed someone to talk to.

Thanks to Clover for talking to me, and offering advice.

Thanks to Zoe, Shrimp, Stare and Penny for creating beautiful graphics and tables that make my jaw drop each and every time I look at them.

Thanks to Aya for being a wonderful gm, and for keeping it fair, and for answering literally any question I asked her.

Thanks to Lulu for creating and upholding this site, where I have managed to find so much happiness.

Thanks to everyone that sponsored and supported Drace, it meant the world to me to hear you guys cheering me on, and I hope I made you all proud! <33