Let's Escape Together {Kiah}

Lost and scared...
Losing what he most desires...
...TURNS HIS LIFE AROUND....
Red Jay

Rage. Rage is what I felt. Rage flew through my veins. I hated him. I hated the way he stormed off, just leaving me on my own. I hated how he couldn’t stand his ground. He couldn’t fight for himself. He had just ran off, leaving me in a fuming mess. But that was not the only thing that cursed through my veins. Pain. Pain filled me too. It hurt so much when he left and slammed the door in my face. It hurt to hear his fading footsteps- or his frustrated grunts. I didn’t mean to upset him, I really didn’t… but I had wanted him to understand, to understand that I wanted to be treated like any other individual. But the words had fallen from his lips and it had felt like every word was coated in fire, whipping across my body. Maybe it wasn’t his fault, but mine. I had misunderstood him, it was me who created this huge problem.

Sighing, I pull my body away from the comforting material of the couch. The couch was one of the only places where I felt safe, happy, comfortable. But today I felt none of that. It had been a week, a week since our fall out, and in that week I had not only lost someone who wanted to share something with me- but also a family member. Jabber. Jabber had been stolen from our family by the capitol. He had been thrown into an arena where he was killed in a matter of moments by other children his age. I knew I couldn’t really blame the children who had taken his life- they were doing it for survival- and I, being blind, know what it feels like to feel vulnerable, to have that burning desire to do anything that may help you survive a few more days.

But that didn’t mean I didn’t miss him. I barely knew him, but still, he had been a family member, and when he left my family had fallen apart. Our family had broken into tiny pieces, pieces that almost seem impossible to put back together. I felt as though, when he felt, that he took a part of everyone with him, and now those parts were gone, gone forever. I often thought of how he must of felt those few moments before he feel into darkness, forever. I wonder if he thought of me, or if I was nothing but a shadow in his thoughts. I know we were never close, but there was still a mutual respect between the two of us, and when he left I had cried for the whole night, silently into my pillow. Then he was gone. Gone forever and I had run out of tears. I didn’t cry anymore. I just sat on my bed, thinking about him- trying to remember the features of his face. Was it chiselled? Or round? Were his eyes blue? Green? Hazel? I didn’t know. I know a long time ago I would have never doubted myself… But now, now doubt is always on the edge of my mind.

My feet make no sound as I creep up the stair of our home, heading towards my room where I could hide from the eyes of the family. As I climbed the steps I paused, hear the soft muffled sound of sobbing coming from the room nearby. I take a moment to listen to the noise, trying to distinguish who the sound comes from. It takes me a moment. Storm. The sobs that filled my ears were the sobs of Storm, the boy who I could barely face, the boy who I had tried to connect with, the boy who was my brother. I didn’t want to go in there. It hurt to hear him crying, but I didn’t- I couldn’t- get myself involved. For all I knew he didn’t want to see me, he didn’t want to look into my sightless eyes and be reminded that I was a boy who couldn’t be treated as his normal average brother- and never will be.

Sighing I pull the door open and take a step into the room. Immediately I am hit with the unfamiliarity of the room, and I freeze. I hadn’t been in this room for years, I had no idea where to step. I had no idea if things were lying on the floor, beggin me to trip over them, I had no idea about anything. Shifting my weight from foot to foot I try to keep my gaze level. “Storm? Storm are you in here?” I ask hesitantly. I knew he was in here, but I didn’t want to say that. I had to be gentle. We had not long ago had a fight, and then lost a brother. I had to gentle, gentleness was the key.