cato&zeus; this ain't love
Sept 11, 2014 23:07:41 GMT -5
Post by анзие (Anz) on Sept 11, 2014 23:07:41 GMT -5
[googlefont="Megrim:400;Carrois Gothic SC:400;"]
Leon Krigel
yeah, you're gonna make them cry
Parties are supposed to be exciting. Colorful, beautiful, full of genuine smiles and the laughter of children - at least, this is how, through the experience in his childhood, that Leon has come to associate them. This one sorely lacks in happiness, and the smile on Leon's face hurts his cheeks as he imagines it hurts others.
It's not the mingling that is the problem - or, at least, it's not the sole and most obvious problem that Leon can think of. At some level he can handle the fact that he has to walk around and pretend there's nothing wrong with him when there are a million reasons he should be in a straitjacket and locked away in a white, padded room.
(But he was.
For a while.
He supposes that it's the fact everyone in the room know more about him than he would once have been willing to give, and the thought scares him because he's never been this wide open before anyone before; they're usually the vulnerable ones. Not him. Not Leon.
What does it change?
Leon's hands tremble but he's made a promise to Nat today and he means to stick to it - the happy little bottle is tucked away somewhere hidden in Nat's room, where Nat claims Leon cannot find it. (He thinks he can, actually, but he's not desperate enough to actually try - and when it gets to that point... well. He doesn't think he'll be able to focus on finding it at all.)
In an attempt to distract himself, Leon reaches out to grab the shirt of the nearest person.
"Hey, have you seen Nat?"
His words are a little slurred and the punch is obviously dangerous, but too late now. Leon squints at the stranger, then shakes his head. "Or Zeus. Have you seen Zeus? Where is he?" His grip tightens - or tries to tighten, the false hand rebelling against his will as it always does. (He'll have time to hate it later.) It occurs to him that he's not had the chance to see one of the best friends he's ever had the pleasure of making since he returned home, and there's a piece of guilt that nibbles at his heart. I should have thought of that sooner. But Zeus is here - isn't he?
It's not the mingling that is the problem - or, at least, it's not the sole and most obvious problem that Leon can think of. At some level he can handle the fact that he has to walk around and pretend there's nothing wrong with him when there are a million reasons he should be in a straitjacket and locked away in a white, padded room.
(But he was.
For a while.
He still remembers what it feels like.)
He supposes that it's the fact everyone in the room know more about him than he would once have been willing to give, and the thought scares him because he's never been this wide open before anyone before; they're usually the vulnerable ones. Not him. Not Leon.
What does it change?
Leon's hands tremble but he's made a promise to Nat today and he means to stick to it - the happy little bottle is tucked away somewhere hidden in Nat's room, where Nat claims Leon cannot find it. (He thinks he can, actually, but he's not desperate enough to actually try - and when it gets to that point... well. He doesn't think he'll be able to focus on finding it at all.)
In an attempt to distract himself, Leon reaches out to grab the shirt of the nearest person.
"Hey, have you seen Nat?"
His words are a little slurred and the punch is obviously dangerous, but too late now. Leon squints at the stranger, then shakes his head. "Or Zeus. Have you seen Zeus? Where is he?" His grip tightens - or tries to tighten, the false hand rebelling against his will as it always does. (He'll have time to hate it later.) It occurs to him that he's not had the chance to see one of the best friends he's ever had the pleasure of making since he returned home, and there's a piece of guilt that nibbles at his heart. I should have thought of that sooner. But Zeus is here - isn't he?
'til they put you in the ground
