lex | district four | fin

.  LEX  .
can't go home
alone again

People seem to think District Four residents only do the same things over and over, every day of their lives: either fish, or swim, or wish we were fishing or swimming. The fact is that fishing is a job most of us are forced to have, and swimming loses its luster extremely quickly over the years. Yes, I am one of the people that fishes for a living, but it isn't like I just sit on a boat every day with a cane pole and a straw hat; no, we catch fish by the ship-load, and then we head back to the shore to weave nets and fashion spears and tridents, and we log what we have enough of that day, what we'll need more of the next day. We don't just sit in some row boat cooking in the sun.

My parents admit all the time that before they moved here from District Seven, they had the same warped view of District Four residents. "Our primary export is fish, after all." It comes as a bit of an insult to me, but I don't ever dare let them know it.

My parents were born in District Seven. My mother says we have family there still, and that she is pretty sure my cousin was in one of the Hunger Games. They were best friends all through school, and then they graduated and joined the force together, and both requested to move here of all places. They couldn't ever get married legally because of their profession, but they still had me and my sister, Leisa, all in secret. They settled into their jobs in the search and rescue branch of District Four's peacekeeping corporation.

Seeing the two of them together, always joking and laughing, you'd think they were lenient parents. But that couldn't be further from the truth. Maybe it's because Leisa and I are supposed to be secrets. We basically are, actually. All of the paperwork says that we belong to our neighbors. Our home address at school is the house right next to ours. Our emergency contacts are the elderly couple that are too dim-witted to ever ask questions when they claim they just must have written down the wrong information. Besides this, they have had to go hunt one too many angry teenagers down for them to ever allow us any extra room to breathe. Their strict views come from their love for us, but all it has really done is make me a great liar.

I steal things. At first I only took little things no one would miss, but eventually I grew attached to the feeling of sneaking into homes while its residents slept, or taking something from someone's purse while they were looking away. It makes me feel alive, and it amuses me that I, the son of two peacekeepers, am one of the best thieves in District Four. It amuses me even more that they have somehow gotten it into their heads that I will follow in their footsteps some day. It is kind of ridiculous, in complete honesty. I wouldn't be much of a peacekeeper, anyway. I'm tall and lanky, and honestly never fight any battles I am not certain from the beginning I can win. Yet they still claim they are sending me to a peacekeeping academy next semester, and unless I get my own house and decide to live solely off of my own income, I'll have to go.

Some of the stuff I steal, I keep. Other stuff can be bought out for an impressive price from some of the pawn shops that litter the beaches and the square. One shop in particular never seems to care if I am in two or three days in a row selling some kind of diamond necklace. It's nice to have the extra cash, but I usually don't spend it unless I absolutely have to. Instead, I store it in a wooden box underneath my bed.

Leisa is the only one that knows about my stealing, but she doesn't share my humor of it. "You're gonna get caught, Lex. You have to stop. If you get caught and get into any trouble, we will both be taken from Mom and Dad, and they'll probably be executed or avoxed." Despite her being three years younger than me, she has always been something of a marvel at leading me rather than me leading her. Good thing, too, because I am not exactly the best role model. She is right, of course. One day I will probably get caught, and then I'll wish I would have listened, but for now I am having fun, and as long as I am having fun, what could be the harm in it?

There is one thing that even Leisa doesn't know about me, though. Even though she is my very best friend, I keep it from her, because this is something too embarrassing and seemingly petty to admit. I have a slight addiction to pleasure. I don't particularly care where it comes from, or who gives it to me, but I have grown accustomed to the euphoric feeling it brings on, to my own embarrassment. It isn't anything extreme. I can see a girl in a bathing suit and not freak out, or anything, but I do find myself unable to sleep sometimes unless there is someone lying next to me.

I guess it hasn't ever been difficult to lure people into my window, or to let me come through theirs. I may not have the body of a peacekeeper, but I am still a fairly attractive person. Thick, dark hair, emerald eyes that mom says remind her of the pine forests back in Seven, and clear skin. I do have pouty lips that make me look like a much younger, more innocent version of myself, and I have always had long, willowy limbs. I have a naturally crooked nose. My core has always been slim, but never muscular, per say, and my fingers are littered with cuts from fishing hooks and fins. I would still say I have more about me that is attractive than unattractive, though. I am, by no means, the most sexy person on the planet. I don't even come close to that expectation, but I am aware of my flaws, and I try my best to embrace them.

I do train, and I guess I am decent at it. My strengths lie more in my knowledge. I know things about the aquatic life in Four. I can treat a wound if I need to. I know how to build fish traps. I can create a make-shift weapon at the drop of a hat, but as soon as I am expected to use it, I fall into the gray area known as 'average'. Can I hold my own, yes. Am I lethal, sort of. Do people fear me, hardly. Really, training is mostly just a stress-reliever, and that is all. If I happen to become good at something that could save me from my own death in an Arena somewhere, then that just makes it that much better. The trainers say I am actually pretty quick for someone so tall. They say if I ever applied myself, I could be something of a weapon. I nod and don't say anything, because little do they know, I do apply myself. I'm just not that special when it comes to training.

I do appreciate them noticing that I am fast, however. I love running, and I always have. I don't really do it as much anymore, now that I work, but when I can find the time, I love to do it. I am good at it. Unlike with training, I can push myself and have positive results, instead of a nearly severed head, or almost impaling a trainer.

Another thing I like to be around is the small rose garden in our back yard. Leisa and I used to tend to the pretty blooms together, but recently it has mostly been her job. When I am having a really hard day, I always find myself sitting on the white bench among the pretty-smelling petals. Something in their sweet scent is calming to me. Perhaps it is the nostalgia that sets in from when Leisa and I first planted the damn things, or when we saw the first bloom. Maybe it is because of all the games the two of us played here once.

Times have changed now. We are both growing up, and even though I am the one with the complicated schedule, it is usually her saying we don't have time to have fun anymore. But I think she is wrong.

I think there is always time for fun.

Even if I have to be invisible.

need someone to
numb the pain