Alphabet [District 7] (fin)

A
A is for Alphabet

People call me Alphie, or sometimes Alphabet. No one can pronounce my name, not even the caretakers and nurses here. I say it to myself, taking time to shape each sound and wonder why my parents gave me such a complicated name. Funny how my nickname came out of an attempt to insult me. It worked at first, but I like the name now. Alphie is a much better and easier name than Queztriankleighsobweydcoxpnemjvaf.

B
B is for Body

My body is thin and long. People would call me gangling, and I suppose in that way I match my name. There's too much me, each limb is too long. Still, I am not completely uncomfortable in my body. It moves with me, following my thoughts most of the time. Sometimes I can't do something right, I move too much or in the wrong way and then I'm left cursing my inelegant frame. That's why I stick to thinking, it involves less moving and so I'm in less danger of breaking something.

C
C is for Curious

I am constantly asking questions. Again and again my teachers tell me that curiosity is a good thing, and yet again and again people repeat at me the ancient saying like a parrot that only knows one line. "Curiosity killed the cat." I'm not a cat, so I guess I'm safe, but the meaning still sits oddly in my stomach. Surely wanting to know about the world isn't a bad thing? There I go with questions again. I just want to learn about how things work, and why the world is what it is.

D
D is for Distracted

I can't focus on things for very long. After only moments I'm back in my head, perhaps thinking about what I should be doing but usually thinking about something else entirely. Nothing really holds my attention for too long. I try to get things done, and usually I get there eventually, but I can't do it all in one go. Sometimes I stop working on something so I can think about how I could break it into more manageable chunks. The irony rarely escapes me. Still, I do my best. The problem is just that I get distracted by all of the thoughts in my head.

E
E is for Eyes

I like my eyes. They're not all that big, and they're not blue or green, but they suit me. At least I think they do. They're very dark, but that's not why they suit me. I think they suit me because they're not the colour you first think they are, just like I'm not the person people first think I am. As well, they're different from everyone else's, just like I'm different from everyone else. My vision is also fine, which is lucky because no one here has the money to get me glasses had I needed, not that they would even if they did. They're nice people - usually - but I'm simply an orphan boy.

F
F is for Forest

The forest is my favorite place to be. I love having the sounds of nature all around me because they are more soothing than the sounds of the District. In the forest I can be myself and not have to interact with people. I can sit down with my back against a tree or log and think, or I can ask and answer questions about the way things happen. I like answering questions almost as much as I like observing the world around me, and usually I accomplish both at the same time. The forest lets me learn so much and have the time to myself to sort through everything I know. Like the plant life, especially, and the little creatures. I have watched what plants certain insects and animals eat, and which ones they avoid; because of this, I know what is safe to eat and what isn't. I could live out here alone if I wanted, but sometimes I want some human company.

G
G is for Geology

For as long as I can remember, I have always been interested in stones. Geology is been a strong passion of mine and I take every opportunity to study the local rock. My trips out the forest provide me with some of the various samples I have laid out in my room. While I enjoy plant life, the earth and its structure fascinate me more than I could ever say. Perhaps I would have been better off with my enthusiasm for stone if I grew up in District twelve, or, better yet, District two. Still, there is plenty to learn from the land here.

H
H is for Honest

I could never lie to anyone. No matter what, I could never bring myself to. Honesty is a virtue, I'm told, and I value it. The fact that I'm always honest sometimes causes trouble for me, though, as I'm not always tactful. When people ask my opinion - though most don't - I always tell them the truth. If I ask questions and want to get proper answers, then I can only offer people the same service. Mostly, though, I am left to answer my own questions. I don't mind it, since I'm always terrible at speaking with people.

I
I is for Imagination

People say I'm creative, whenever I actually tell someone what I've been thinking - which is rare, and they say that I have a big imagination. Most people mean it like it's a good thing, but sometimes they try to use it like an insult. I can usually ignore insults, though. I like to pretend I'm another person in another world, and that I am stronger or braver or more popular than I really am. In my head I can be whoever or whatever I want.

J
J is for Judged

People judge me because I'm quiet. They ignore me, or give me snide looks, or talk about me when they think I'm not listening. I can feel the weight of their opinions rest on my shoulders like I carry each person on my back. So I just let them fall off, let them hit the ground. Why catch a person who only intends to drag you down with them? I have all I need in my mind and in the forest.

K
K is for Kindness

That's not to say I am mean to people. I do enjoy helping others, and seeing people smiling. Maybe that's because I feel like I have so little to smile about that I want to give other people a reason to feel good. In return, it does give me a little bit of joy when I see I've made a difference to them. Kindness is essential if we're all supposed to live together. Without it, the world would be a miserable place - miserable and lonely, like how I feel a lot more than I'd like to.

L
L is for Listen

Most of the time I just like to sit and listen to what's going on around me. Listening is probably the one thing that I can do while I think, and sometimes listening to silence is the best thing I can do. Out in the forest, when no one's around, I can have my moments of solace with just the sounds of the animals surrounding me. I just wish that someone might listen with me, or to me.

M
M is for Me

I don't think anyone understands me. I don't even know if I understand myself. It's not that I don't like people - I do, though not all of them are nice - it's just that I prefer to be alone with my thoughts. I think much more easily when there is no one around. If I'm given a problem I go to a distant part of the room and sit by myself to solve it. I love puzzles and I like people but, for me, those two don't mix. When I do things, I guess I like to do them alone. Just me, myself, and I.

N
N is for Nature

I love nature. The trees, the bushes and ferns, the animals and flowers. Flora and fauna are probably my two favorite things. Sitting alone in the forest with nothing but the forest around me always gives me a sense of peace and belonging. I want to spend the rest of my life around nature, and other people are optional. Maybe I'm a bit too harsh about people but they don't welcome you with open arms like the forest does. Animals are skittish and wary of you when you first arrive, but they learn that you mean no harm. I've fed squirrels from my hand and had birds land on my arm. They are inquisitive, like me.

O
O is for Outside

I spend most of my time outside. Being away from people and in fresh air is something I really enjoy. Walls compress me in every direction, pressing on my body and mind and identity, in ways the forest never could. I don't like being inside for too long, it makes me feel trapped. Out here, I feel free to be myself and to think whatever I think. No restrictions, to rules, I'm outside of everything - sometimes even myself. I enjoy the disconnect, the little breaks from the life my parents thrust me into when I was so young. The trees don't care what my name is, nor do the birds. In the outdoors I am whoever I want to be.

P
P is for Parents

I had parents at one point. Everyone in the orphanage had parents at one point. Mine never cared about me, though. They never died or ran away, they were never arrested by Peacekeepers. All of the stories the other kids tell about their parents don't match with mine. I was just a little kid and my parents had decided they didn't want me. Before I could even know what they wanted from me, they had already given up. Then they gave me up, to the orphanage. I remember them, a bit, and I remember the name they gave me - the one that I'm sure was just for the sake of making my life hard. I don't know why they hated me so much, but they must have.

Q
Q is for Queztriankleighsobweydcoxpnemjvaf

No one can pronounce my name. I'm not even sure my parents had the real hang of it, but they made me memorize how to say it. They never explained why they gave me such a peculiar name, though after the way they thrust me upon the orphanage I don't think they did it to make me special. I get the feeling they did it because they wanted to make my life hard. Well, they certainly managed that. Still, my name is interesting so I take what good I can from this. I do prefer my nickname of Alphie to the jumbled syllables most people make of my name. Simple is sometimes better, and for names that's very true.

No one ever says "I wish I had a name like yours."

R
R is for Rain

I love the rain. The sound of it is so soothing for me. As well, the way it clears the air after a rainfall is wonderful. I feel like just breathing in that purified air cleans up my lungs and removes some of the dark parts of my past - at least, it makes the dark parts more bearable. Rain is a cleanser, a bath that washes the whole area. The patter of the rain on the roof and walls helps me to sleep when my thoughts are going a million miles an hour. I just have to listen to the rain and it lets my mind slow down and ease into unconsciousness because I know when I wake up that the world will be a little fresher.

S
S is for Science

Science is my favorite subject, it's all about learning how things work and answering the questions of why and how. I have a knack for it, as well, which makes it even better. Some of the kids just don't get it and I don't understand why. When I try to explain things to them, they look at me like I'm growing a second head. But I didn't just get into science because I was good at it. I love science because I can learn more about how the world works. Once I found Geology I was completely hooked. I may come from District seven, but I want to be a famous scientist some day.

T
T is for Thoughts

I like thinking. My thoughts are the one place where I don't have to explain everything. If I could communicate through my thoughts I would find things so much easier, maybe then people would be able to follow my logic without looking at me like I've gone crazy. I make leaps, sure, but each is logical. My jumps in logic are like looking at 2 + 2 and knowing it's 4 without taking two sticks and adding them to two sticks and counting out four sticks. It's more efficient that way. Still, no one can keep up so I have to explain every time. If people knew how I thought I'm sure I would be able to avoid all that.

U
U is for Unhappy

I don't know if I would actually say that I'm unhappy, but I know that I am not living the life that I really want to. If I could pick what my life would look like then I would probably be happier. Of course, that would be true for anyone. There's a saying of "be careful what you wish for" but I don't know if choosing how my life should be would count for that. I don't want anything fancy, anyway, I just want a family who loved me and a best friend. I'm unhappy because I don't have anyone to make me happy. There, well I guess I am unhappy. I wish there was something I could do about it.

V
V is for Vacant

You could say my life is pretty vacant. I have no parents, so that's two gaps right away, I don't really have someone that I would call a friend, yet another missing piece in my life. Not to mention, all the time I spend alone - I'm sure someone has said I'm very vacant in my life. I prefer empty areas where I can just be by myself and not have to be around people. Some people have even told me that I get this really blank look on my face sometimes, like I just shut off. I think it happens when I am contemplating something, and I suppose it's part of the reason why people don't really come up and talk to me.

W
W is for Why

Why is my favorite of the question words. I always love to learn what drives things to happen and asking why is the best way to learn. My curiosity drives me to want to know things. I know the why behind my actions, but I still have so much to learn about the world. People, especially, since there are so many reasons why a person could do something. Maybe if I learn more about people I will be able to learn why my parents left me on the doorstep of this orphanage, or at least why they gave me such a difficult name. Why is a useful question to ask, but it's not very helpful if you don't have the answers.

X
X is for Xenolith

Of all of my possessions, there is one thing that I treasure more than anything else. It's a xenolith rock - a piece of rock that has one type of rock embedded in another type of rock. In this case, my xenolith is peridotite trapped within granodiorite - it's looks a bit like green granite trapped within the common grey granite. When I found it I was completely fascinated, since this was the first and only example of a xenolith I had found. Using what books I could, I researched on xenoliths and on the combination of rock that I had found. Really, that rock sample was pushed me to do deeper research into geology.

Y
Y is for Yearning

I like to say that I enjoy being alone a lot more than I like being with others, but that's not entirely true. I do really like taking time to myself to simply not be with anyone, and yet I can feel really alone at times. I want someone I can really spend time with, someone who would just sit with me and not feel the need to say anything, someone I can be around without having to actively be around. A companion, I guess you would call them. Someone I haven't met yet.

Z
Z is for Zoned

People say I "zone out" a lot. I don't, really. I'm always aware of what's around me, I just ignore it for the most part. When I think things through I don't bother paying attention to what's happening, I just think about whatever I'm thinking about. Someone could say my brain is running on automatic - which is true for some aspects of bodily function. I guess some people might get weirded out that I look off somewhere and don't respond for a while. Zoning out is kind of nice sometimes, though, I get to ignore the world for a while and just be with my thoughts.