BB Simulation Reaction Thread [70.25√(-1)th]

[earthling] Administrator 9,478 POSTS Pronouns: She/Her last seen May 31, 2024 23:51:42 GMT -5 cameron stood in line for an hour for a stupid ride for me <3 best <3	BB Simulation Reaction Thread [70.25√(-1)th] Jun 24, 2015 23:31:49 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by [earthling] on Jun 24, 2015 23:31:49 GMT -5 Please post any AU reactions to the BB simulation in this thread.
	Last Edit: Jun 24, 2015 23:39:36 GMT -5 by [earthling] credit dars credit ✨ - chars -

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cameron stood in line for an hour for a stupid ride for me <3 best <3

BB Simulation Reaction Thread [70.25√(-1)th] Jun 24, 2015 23:38:15 GMT -5

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Post by [earthling] on Jun 24, 2015 23:38:15 GMT -5

a note from the desk of

Mace Emberstatt

of District Ten

when you never thought that it could ever get this tough,
that's when you feel my kind of love

In the summer of district Ten, everything takes on an orange hue. From the first flickering of daylight, to the aging sunflowers in front of the Mayor's home, to Regalia's freshly dyed hair, everything is just this side of red. He would have never known that, if he hadn't gone to the Capitol and seen everything bleached and sanitized.

The return trip hung over his head, a day away but pressing on the present. He bent his elbows to his knees, leaning over his legs. Beside him, Saffron sat, still as a statue. He held her hand, his lifeline, although he felt no fear. The last reaping had taken two boys he had not known. Two boys, and no one else. When he looked over the sea of teenagers, he found that he recognized almost none of them. Soon, he would be on the train, picking out Saffron's favorite chocolates from the pile. Soon, he would be reunited with Julian and their three children. Soon.

He turned his knees into Saffron's, twisting to look up at her. "You ever wonder how they always know how to pronounce the names right?" He not-quite-whispered. The Capitolite cleared her throat into the microphone and read a name he did not know.

"Indigo. I mean that one's easy." He offered Saffron an encouraging smile. Like, it's not so bad that a stranger is under our care for the next two weeks. It's not so bad if she doesn't make it home.

Still turned to Saffron, he glanced out at the closest pen. Regalia grinned toothily at him. Her hair looked like a beehive piled high atop her head. He did not think the look was flattering but she wouldn't hear it that morning. It was her last Reaping, her last chance at having an excuse to be in front of the cameras. Whenever one blinked at her, she twisted, letting her dress fall around her calves. Mace rolled his eyes, motioning for her to stop showing off -

"Regalia Stromstatt!"

They froze, she mid-swing, he with one hand cutting down and away. He could barely feel his fingertips even as he tore them away from Saffron. He had to get to Regalia, had to find a place to hide her. He would kill again, he knew in that moment, anyone who stopped him. Starting with the Capitolite escort who had butchered her name. He would, he would, he would -

"Paige Lowe!"

Mace put his face into his hands and wept.

Last Edit: Jun 24, 2015 23:38:27 GMT -5 by [earthling]

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“And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good.” - steinbeck

BB Simulation Reaction Thread [70.25√(-1)th] Jun 28, 2015 2:30:53 GMT -5

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Post by ✌ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ on Jun 28, 2015 2:30:53 GMT -5

I FEEL THIS COLD INSIDE ME IT HOWLS AWAY

BANG GUN

ALL THROUGH THE MARKET IT CALLS YOUR NAME.

Aiden thinks it's nerves.

That the reason I look behind me fearfully with every step we take away from the gun shop is because I'm afraid I'll get reaped and never see my home again. He thinks it's all just nerves that makes me hold his hand so tightly, like I can't remember how to breathe if I'm not holding onto his hand, like it's life or death. I can tell in the way that he nudges my arm with his that he wants to distract me from the reaping and impending doom.

I'm not scared for the reaping. For along time now, I've been hoping to be reaped if only to get away from my father. Anything is preferable to the rage in his fists, even probably death. I'm no fighter. I freeze up and nearly cry in fear every time someone makes a fist. Sometimes I just think I'd like the freedom of dying with a choice instead of by my father's hands. So I'm not scared for the reaping.

I'm scared because Aiden is dying very slowly beside me and I can see it in the way he seems more tired and drawn every day,how sometimes he gets tired after walking for twenty minutes, how he coughs blood into a handkerchief and tries to hide it from me like I don't know. He told me a few weeks ago that his death was imminent, that this time he wouldn't recover from the cancer that had claimed his mother and had been trying to take him for so long. I didn't believe him. Now I do. Today he is skinnier than the poorest kid from the slums. Today he is very much dying and I am scared.

I am scared because when I woke up this morning my dad was holding a gun in his hands and said to me,"I should just kill you before those Capitol Assholes can lay a finger on you." I watched him release the safety and watched as he aimed the gun at my head and I shut my eyes and I waited for the bullet to eat my brain just like I wait every single time he aims at me. It doesn't come today but somehow I feel like the bullet will come for my head soon.

Aiden thinks I am nervous for the reaping.

He takes me to breakfast and we eat dense pastries that are covered in sugar and more delicious than anything I've ever tasted in my life. Aiden calls them reverse sonnets or something. My leg shakes beneath the table as we eat and I watch him barely touch his food. He must not be feeling well today. He keeps a brave face on for me but I wish he wouldn't. I'm not stupid. I'm thinking about this, about to pop one of the pastries into my mouth when he leans forward and kisses me before I can eat.

I wasn't expecting his lips on mine, I gasp in surprise and stare at him, it makes him laugh. When I smile softly at him and try to eat the pastry again, he darts in, quick as anything and steals another kiss.

It makes me laugh. It's a good laugh but if I go on too long, I'll start crying. I don't know why. Today is a bad day. The sun is shining and I'm eating breakfast with Aiden but it's a bad day. My chest feels tight and I'm dizzy, like I want to throw up. My hands shake and tears wait behind my eyes. A feeling of overwhelming despair is sitting over my head and it's so damn heavy. This feeling happens a lot to me. I wish it wouldn't. I think it's the same sort of crazy my mom had when she set fire to her own skin and I don't want it.

Aiden tries to get me to laugh again and so I do, for him. I'd do anything for Aiden. Before him, there was no one. Before Aiden stopped me, asked if he could help me, I thought that my life would just go on like it had before Aiden until the day I died. His day of dying is soon. It comes closer everyday. Sometimes he reminds me of this. I wish he wouldn't. I don't know what I'll do when Aiden dies. I'll be all alone again, with my dad. Just me, him and his rage. I don't know if I'll be able to stand it.

I'm scared because without Aiden, I might just go batshit like my mom did but I'm afraid of fire.

When we finish eating and the reaping is looming over our heads he takes my hand again and I'm glad for it. I don't think I could move without Aiden. I feel like I'm on fire right now, allover again.Flames are licking up my scarred arms, wrapping their heat around my neck. I don't tell Aiden that I'm still hoping that I'll get reaped. I'm scared and sad and if we're both leaving this world anyway, I want to leave it before him. I'm too weak to live in a world without him.

He'd hate me if I told him that.

So I don't.

We stand with the other children our age and I don't question it; why we have to be reaped, why kids are punished. I know that if they call my name, I'll walk meekly up to the stage and take my place beside the dying and dead. My father is right about me, the things he says. I'm not a boy, I'm a maggot, feeble and afraid of sunlight.

Aiden ignores the rules about alphabetical order and no one stops him. "He has cancer," they whisper to each other and they let him do as he pleases. I think he knows this. I don't know if he cares anymore, if he ever did. I'm glad that he doesn't seem to. I hold him in my arms and he is small and fragile and breaking second by second but I'll hold him together for as long as I can. He is the nicest and best thing that has ever happened to me. For as long as I can, I'll hold him.

He doesn't seem interested as the Capitolite gives their spiel about what an honour it is to be a tribute in the games and make district three proud. I shake as I listen, breath coming quicker, barely able to take the suspense anymore. I want them to say the names and get it over with. I want them to call my name so that I never have to go home again. I want them to call out someone I don't know and I want to spend the rest of the day with Aiden. I want to throw up.

"Aiden Sedgwick."

Confusion costs me a second of precious time and I waste it and I regret it so sorely. Later on I'll think about it and wonder if the reason I didn't react faster is because I'm a coward. I'll wonder if it's because I'll always look to save my own skin first, even if it means Aiden's safety is compromised. My father is right, I'll think. I'm a selfish coward.

I suck in a breath of air, ready to give myself up so Aiden can live for a few more months but before anything can come out, he clamps his hand roughly over my mouth and I wince as my teeth bite my tongue and he's screaming his acceptance. He's leaving my arms, roughly, getting away from my grasp and he's going as fast as he can to the stage without a backward glance, leaving me. Leaving me.

"Please Aiden," I whisper at him, even as he apologizes and confirms his acceptance on stage. "Please I'm scared," I sob, clawing at the air, reaching for him, so far from me. So far, "Don't leave me alone with him," I beg, "Don't leave me alone with my father."

But they are escorting him off of the stage.

He can't hear me.

I throw up on my shoes.

Last Edit: Jun 28, 2015 2:34:01 GMT -5 by ✌ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

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BB Simulation Reaction Thread [70.25√(-1)th] Jun 28, 2015 5:58:57 GMT -5

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Post by ✨ on Jun 28, 2015 5:58:57 GMT -5

S

S

♔

L

For some reason, this morning I cannot speak.

Thankfully Mace does the talking for me. It is as if the train has swept me up and sent me back all those years ago to when I refused to open my stitched-up lips and let my bruised heart mourn the loss of a girl I once was. Secrets hanging at the nape of my sister's neck and feathers interlocking fingers, de ja vu wraps it's wrath around my brain and sends me into silence. I am frozen in time, shivering at the memory of Lucy's towering figure above me in the snow. Warmth comes to me in the form of Mace's hands and they stop me from jerking my fists up to hear the crack of Lucy's rib cage puncturing her lungs, absorbed in a memory I both crave and loathe to forget.

"Indigo. I mean that one's easy."

I smile slightly - terrified of the cameras picking up any trace of pleasure on my face. There is nothing to smile about today, but I do it anyway. It is, my face assures. A hand squeeze confirms it. That one is easy.

"Regalia Stromstatt!" isn't.

Everything freezes - including me. My lifeline disconnects and I think my heart stops beating for the second time in my new life. I can't hear anything but gasps and a broken cacophony of that one's easy, that one's easy, that one's easy.

"Paige Lowe!"

That one's easy...

From the crowds, my mother wails. A shrill sound rings across the District Square and I can't seem to clamp my mouth shut. The world around me begins to collapse, just as it did in the arena as Ewe lay dead upon the scarlet-stained ground. A shard of the sky falls and pierces through my chest but it's already broken upon repair and I can do nothing to stop the step, step, step of Paige's feet echoing through the universe. Stop, I beg - I don't hear my voice but she's too damn stubborn to listen to me. She can't hear me. I can't even hear myself. Stop - step - stop it - step. I walked for her, for Mom, for Mace - but she walks for herself and nobody else. I reach out to grab for Mace's hand but they're at his face and I have nobody to cling to. No Mace, No Mom, No Paige-

My world collapses around me. Her steps send cracks through the pavement, tremours threatening swallowing us all. From above and below we break the world apart and as I fall into her eroding earth I reach out my hand and beg for a lifeline, for someone to lift me back up from the wordless depths I swallowed myself up in for so long. But there is no-one's hand to hold. Only ghosts - Lucy Ivana Cerise Lucy Ivana Cerise - their faded silhouettes only blur in my overflowing eyes as transparent fingers pass through me as nothing but weightless air.

I wake up to the sound of my own screaming and find I cannot speak.