daisy song // district 8 (FIN)
Jun 26, 2015 15:13:28 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Jun 26, 2015 15:13:28 GMT -5
vintage diary creator
fantaisie "daisy" song
fantaisie "daisy" song
Sometimes, she could be tiny when she looked in the mirror. Daisy never wanted to 'cause it hurt so bad but she could.
Sometimes, Daisy would tell Molly about her special power but then Molly would keep saying, "Keep dreamin', Fantaisie—"
(You ain't sayin' it right, Miss Molly, and I keep tellin' you that you ain't.)
"—'cause I ain't belivin' anymore of your shit."
Shit. Nothing she told Miss Molly was shit, 'cause Daisy swore a month ago to tell the truth. She wasn't no liar, she was a truther, and no one else except Desiree believed her but Desiree was whipped for saying that and everyone else said that Daisy was hallucinating just like her mother did all the time before she died.
(I wish I was the one dead instead of her, 'cause then the bed and the couch and the picture frame and the door and everythin' else could stop lookin' small and I could stop gettin' headaches and headaches and headaches and...)
Things first started looking small when Daisy was just Fantaisie, which was five years ago when she was only ten, and at that time Fantaisie thought she could put them in the dollhouse at the community home. She was wrong though, 'cause whenever Fantaisie tried the furniture would get bigger again and then the kids would start teasing her and teasing her and teasing and teasing and...
Fantaisie stopped touching the furniture at that point and ate and slept on the floor.
Her headaches never ceased as she got older though, so the only exciting part about getting taller and more responsibility were the events where she became Daisy at twelve and never Fantaisie at thirteen. Miss Molly and Miss Katrina (she saw the two kissing in Miss Molly's dingy office not too long ago) were new employees at the time after Mrs. Fairchild had retired and never bothered to get Fantaisie right; kept saying Fan-tayzee instead of what should've been a quick and simple fantasy, that ignorant young couple.
She hated how her migraines prodded her patience and sanity every minute of every hour of every day of every week. It hurt so bad to the point of where she sobbed for help like a baby. She hated how vivid those visions were when she felt bigger than normal and everything else appeared tiny, as if she were a giant and the children's home was her target that was to be destroyed. It always happened when she was being bullied or when Miss Katrina was criticizing her worth, and it hurt.
Daisy just wished she could die.
volume i. march
My name is Fantaisie Min-a Song.Deserea Desiree said I should keep a diary journal, and at first I said, "I ain't gonna do pathetic stuff like that" but then she kept pushing me and made me but this stoopid stupid book.
Maybe I'm the stupid one and not the book. I can't spell or read good
Desiree said to cross out the earlier part and describe myself.She's not my mother just cause she's two years older than me...
I'm short. The doctor says to expect to not grow taller than 5"1. I have brown hair and fair skin. My eyes aren't round like Desiree's, but I wish they were causethere're their're they're pretty on her. I'm 12. I'm skinnier than I should be and I don't have enough clothes but not just cause I'm a girl but cause people here know to too well how to fix broken butteons and stuck zippers so they don't donate them to Fairchild's Community Home.
I have a disease. A bad one and it happens to me all the time when I get mad or scared or whatever. I get really bad headaches, mean ones, and then everything looks smaller, too smaller. I know it's fake, but it's too real and it HURTSSSSSSS_____________
[water drops are scattered on the page. they've long dried since the writer had stopped writing.]
I hate myself. I wish I was never born.
volume iii. december
Desiree says to write something good about me. I'm feeling happy right now so this should be easy.
Desiree says I have a cute laugh and smooth skin. She likes how free I look when I smile at her. I like it when I see other people being happy cause then I feel like I did something good for them and Panem is being helpful to us for once. I like making other's laugh because then I feel like a helper instead of an annoyance.
Especially when Desiree's smiling and laughing because then I feel good inside.
I'm 13 now. 5'0". I still have brown hair and fair skin. My face is oval shaped. My eyes are dark and Desiree says they look like they're almost black. I've stopped saying "ain't" now, at least in public. Desiree says only uneducated people say that and that I'm well educated cause I write in mydiary journal everyday. I've wasted two books already. The shop owner says I'll take all of their stock.
I wanna stop but it wouldn't feel right.
volume iii. august
Desiree's dying cause she's sick so she said to write about my personality.
i can't i can't i can't
She said I can and to smile.
I'm smiling. I hide my problems so no one has to bother. I like making other's happy. I hate it when other's are beingmeen mean to me. I hate it when everthing looks smaller because then it hurts. Desiree says that I'm like her little sister who is my age now but died when Desiree was 9. She says I'm silly and childish and innocent and all the stuff I thought I wasn't.
As long as Desiree says so, then I am.
volume iv. january
I've wasted my third book and turned it into a health log for Desiree but now she's dead and it hurts to write this cause everything around me is so small. The doctor says to take medicine for it but I'm scared I'll be like my mother.
I'd rather live through pain than hide it away. Desiree said that was the brave way.
volume iv. september
The teacher said to stop saying "cause" because "cause" doesn't mean because but the reason that something happened. Like the cause of my teacher yelling at me was because I was saying cause.
iwanna want to become a writer for Desiree's sake, but Alfred said there wasn't no was no point in doing so cause because Desiree was dead and I don't waste my time crying about my mother so why should I? I said he was stupid and I don't care that he was new at the home, and the cause of that was because his parents and siblings and relatives died in a house fire which I in fact find stupid so there was no point in crying about them either.
He started crying and I was forced to say sorry which I did but reluctantly.
Sometimes, Daisy would tell Molly about her special power but then Molly would keep saying, "Keep dreamin', Fantaisie—"
(You ain't sayin' it right, Miss Molly, and I keep tellin' you that you ain't.)
"—'cause I ain't belivin' anymore of your shit."
Shit. Nothing she told Miss Molly was shit, 'cause Daisy swore a month ago to tell the truth. She wasn't no liar, she was a truther, and no one else except Desiree believed her but Desiree was whipped for saying that and everyone else said that Daisy was hallucinating just like her mother did all the time before she died.
(I wish I was the one dead instead of her, 'cause then the bed and the couch and the picture frame and the door and everythin' else could stop lookin' small and I could stop gettin' headaches and headaches and headaches and...)
Things first started looking small when Daisy was just Fantaisie, which was five years ago when she was only ten, and at that time Fantaisie thought she could put them in the dollhouse at the community home. She was wrong though, 'cause whenever Fantaisie tried the furniture would get bigger again and then the kids would start teasing her and teasing her and teasing and teasing and...
Fantaisie stopped touching the furniture at that point and ate and slept on the floor.
Her headaches never ceased as she got older though, so the only exciting part about getting taller and more responsibility were the events where she became Daisy at twelve and never Fantaisie at thirteen. Miss Molly and Miss Katrina (she saw the two kissing in Miss Molly's dingy office not too long ago) were new employees at the time after Mrs. Fairchild had retired and never bothered to get Fantaisie right; kept saying Fan-tayzee instead of what should've been a quick and simple fantasy, that ignorant young couple.
She hated how her migraines prodded her patience and sanity every minute of every hour of every day of every week. It hurt so bad to the point of where she sobbed for help like a baby. She hated how vivid those visions were when she felt bigger than normal and everything else appeared tiny, as if she were a giant and the children's home was her target that was to be destroyed. It always happened when she was being bullied or when Miss Katrina was criticizing her worth, and it hurt.
Daisy just wished she could die.
volume i. march
My name is Fantaisie Min-a Song.
Desiree said to cross out the earlier part and describe myself.
I'm short. The doctor says to expect to not grow taller than 5"1. I have brown hair and fair skin. My eyes aren't round like Desiree's, but I wish they were cause
I have a disease. A bad one and it happens to me all the time when I get mad or scared or whatever. I get really bad headaches, mean ones, and then everything looks smaller, too smaller. I know it's fake, but it's too real and it HURTSSSSSSS_____________
[water drops are scattered on the page. they've long dried since the writer had stopped writing.]
I hate myself. I wish I was never born.
volume iii. december
Desiree says to write something good about me. I'm feeling happy right now so this should be easy.
Desiree says I have a cute laugh and smooth skin. She likes how free I look when I smile at her. I like it when I see other people being happy cause then I feel like I did something good for them and Panem is being helpful to us for once. I like making other's laugh because then I feel like a helper instead of an annoyance.
Especially when Desiree's smiling and laughing because then I feel good inside.
I'm 13 now. 5'0". I still have brown hair and fair skin. My face is oval shaped. My eyes are dark and Desiree says they look like they're almost black. I've stopped saying "ain't" now, at least in public. Desiree says only uneducated people say that and that I'm well educated cause I write in my
I wanna stop but it wouldn't feel right.
volume iii. august
Desiree's dying cause she's sick so she said to write about my personality.
She said I can and to smile.
I'm smiling. I hide my problems so no one has to bother. I like making other's happy. I hate it when other's are being
As long as Desiree says so, then I am.
volume iv. january
I've wasted my third book and turned it into a health log for Desiree but now she's dead and it hurts to write this cause everything around me is so small. The doctor says to take medicine for it but I'm scared I'll be like my mother.
I'd rather live through pain than hide it away. Desiree said that was the brave way.
volume iv. september
The teacher said to stop saying "cause" because "cause" doesn't mean because but the reason that something happened. Like the cause of my teacher yelling at me was because I was saying cause.
i
He started crying and I was forced to say sorry which I did but reluctantly.
