Hollow heart and broken promises [Pariah Possine, oneshot]

Pariah Possine

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It's been days. Days and countless days since I've seen Apollo and my heart hurts for her. I miss her so much and as the days go by, my muse for the living dwindles. It's not that the ones left over are hideous but I can't communicate with the remaining here. They don't get me at all. They just let me thrash in the night. They can't comfort me like Apollo has. I've barely slept at all these past few days and my body feels like it's starting to shut down. Food is just a thing of the past and as the day comes for the debut of the first time to see her since she left me, I'm terrified.

I wanted her to stay with me.

I wanted her to comfort me in my night terrors because she's the only person that had been able to do that. Bruises litter my body, dancing up and down on my skin from the headboard of the bed. My knees are purpe and blue from hitting the floor from the other night. My mind aches to hear her voice again.

Cal has tried to comfort me, but I disreguard him. I just don't want anyone else. There's no one else like her, at all.

"Apollo." I wearily say as the sleepless night has put darkness under my eyes. I didn't want to hinder anyone from sleeping, so I found out how to keep that from happening. The closet has become my safe spot, complete with the candle burning bright to illuminate the small space.

"Apollo. I'm with you in spirit. Just like my momma and daddy are with me, I am with you. You will be alright. I love you." I whisper. I whisper because if I spoke any louder, I would wake my roommate.

I open the door to the bedroom and look to the window. Light bleeds in just a little. It's just enough to tell me that the day has began and that the terrifying moment will happen soon and then I'll watch her take her first steps into the arena. I crawl out of my closet, blowing out the candle as I do so. Very slowly, I look at the lump in the bed of my sleeping roomie and grab my thin robe and wrap it around my frailing features.

My head swims.

The stairs and the house have become alive with noise in a matter of moments. Everyone awaits the games debut but me. I don't wait on them, becuase I can feel myself already there. I feel Apollo's presence within my heart and it's hurting so awfully bad.

"Parriah." I think my name is called, but I don't listen. I only go into the living room and look at the broadcast that has started.

The next little while is nothing but a blur. The newscasters. The victors pictures being replayed on the screen. The arena... all the white that would soon be littered with crimson blood. I fear for her.

"Apollo... please. Come back to me." I beg with whispered wishes that wouldn't go to her. Their faces apear and as I see her tiny features, I can't help but smile. I perk up for the first time in days. She is my morning glory that stretches to the sun after a cold night. "IT'S APOLLO! APOLLO IS THERE!" I scream out and wrap my arms around my legs. I long to see her fight to the finish. I want to see her look at the camera when she's safe and I want to know that she's thinking of me too.

"Come on, Pollo. I"m rooting for you." I say again, whispered of course because I fear that Salemn or someone else would taunt me for my childish wishes. Wishes that I wish I could make come true.

The timer starts and my heart stops.

She readys herself and I clutch onto my feelings.

I hide my face in my knees, only peeking out through the top as the cacophony of tributes start running. Everyone aims for certain areas whereas others immediately flee. The action that the cameras happen suddenly shift over to Apollo as she runs, but some little girl, some tiny little thing like me - runs into her. She knocks her off balance or something. Something happens, but in a mere moment, seconds after the buzzer...

"APOLLO GET UP. GET UP APOLLO. GET UP. GET UP.... GET.... UP..." I scream over and over again. My voice is never this loud, but for her to do this to me. For her to suddenly stop moving. I look to the house that has suddenly become an eery silence, I look at everyone that is stunned.

"What's wrong with you. Tell her to stand up. Tell her that she needs to get up... why aren't you.. helping me?" I beg and as the room's silence still screams in my ear, I realized -

Apollo isn't coming back.

My eyes well up entirely and tears cascade down my freckled cheeks. "Why...? Apollo, why... you told me everything was going to be okay?" I clamber to my feet, dashing up the stairs and into my bedroom. I dash into the closet and slam the door. I fumble with the matches that i've used to light the candle and with shaking hands, I manage to light it and the glow of a flicker appear and the candle suddenly comes to life.

"Apollo... wake me up. Wake me up... I can't wake up. Why can't I wake up?"