It'll never be enough for us [tom/zoe/kay]

How does one grieve in proper ways? That is a question you asked yourself as you caressed the blanket that Bella used to tuck you into. It was hard, trying to let go of the one person that you had left in the world. However, that was cut short by a boy who Bella shared a connection with. A boy that never realized how much it would hurt to lose someone that you were related to by blood. At the end of the day, you watched him die. And for some reason, you did not feel happiness. No. You felt the pain that he must have felt when he watched his spear go into Bella’s eye. It pained you to watch as the life drained out of your sister and you watched her body go still. You wanted to scream. You wanted to cry. You wanted to punch a hole through the wall because that would be the way you would remember your sister.

Everyone told you not to watch, but after the third day, you got hooked. Your eyes were glued to the T.V. and after watching her go up against that zombie tribute, that is when you realized that Bella was fighting to come back home. To come back to you. And you rejoiced. You wanted everything to happen that could have because that would have meant the world to you. Your eyes were bright with the hope that one day, you would be able to hug your sister again. That you would be able to enjoy her company, and even brag to everyone that she was a victor. You would have not understood what that fully meant, but hey, what did it matter? She would have been here to watch you grow up. She would have been able to guide you through some sort of life. A small semblance would dragged you to a humanity that you could have escaped too.

But that would never happen. Because Bella Rose was dead, and she was never coming back.

And how do you try to live with that? The fact that your sister will never come back so as long as you live. And to make it all worse, there could be a small chance that you join her in a similar fate. As much as you tried to make it seem less than what it was, you grew irritable. You knew that everything wouldn’t be the same no matter how much you cried to the people who thought you cared. And you did, but that didn’t stop anyone from telling you that the wounds would heal. Would they? Would they really heal? You begged to differ with your locks flowing in your face to dry up some of the tears that you shed every minute. At the end of the day, no one would know the pain that you felt because you were just another sibling of a tribute that was taken too soon. And as much as you wanted to ignore that sentiment, it killed you inside. Absolutely disemboweled you in ways that you didn’t think were possible.

You hated yourself because there was nothing to do.

But how do you cope with this? Do you write down all of your emotions in a journal? Do you pray that one day Bella would come back to you? Do you end your life where it stands? Or do you live in a way that Bella would have wanted? But what would have been that way? You didn’t know and you would never know, because her life was cut short. Stolen away before your eyes. You watched it disappear, and you wished you could get it back. Back from wherever it went.

You didn’t want to have a funeral for her. You wanted to burn her body into ashes, and then make a necklace out of what you could so you could always keep it on you. You told yourself that letting go would be the last thing that you ever did, but you knew that one day you had to do it. However, there were many people here would wanted to a formal burial, and you could not be the one to deny that from them. However, that did not mean you wanted to be anywhere near them when you grieved. No. You wanted no one to see that, because you, Marley Rose, knew all too well that was not what your sister wanted. She wanted no tears shed over her death. She accepted it with grace. The only thing that she ever knew.

You wished she could have gotten to say her goodbyes to everyone, but instead you now had to listen to people gush about how much they were going to miss her.

You weren’t ready for that. You never would be. And so that is why you stayed away until you were forced to face your fear head one. Just like Bella did.

She was always the fearless one after all.

You sat at the hill overlooking the cemetery, your arms hugging your knees as you tried to rack your brain around what was going on today. As much as you hated to admit it, this was the day you needed to be strong, for everyone that was involved. The pound needed someone who could bring them the same happiness that Bella brought them. Someone needed to be there to tell Rogue how evil she was, and someone needed to be there to tell Norbert that it wasn’t his fault that she died. You couldn’t bring yourself to move though, because statues didn’t move.

You were stuck in your sorrow, condemned to a life of pain and suffering for everyone to see and feel. You never knew what it was like to be as sad as you were, but that soon would become a feeling that would become your best friend, and while you prayed to whatever ripred there was to bless you with happiness, you knew that death was somewhere nearby, waiting to claim your life just like he did to your sister.

You weren’t ready to face that yet, or anyone to be exact.

And so you waited until someone came to you, because that would always be easier.