don't like your little games [kousei]
Jan 8, 2018 15:59:02 GMT -5
Post by solo on Jan 8, 2018 15:59:02 GMT -5
charlotte
Words struggle to force themselves out of his mouth, but all I get is a jumble of stuttering and uncertainty. He almost seems like a different person from the guy I met in the training center, the one who was so sure of himself, with arrogance as his weapon and an annoying level of confidence at his side. It almost makes me wonder why I had a good time in the first place. But then I remember laughing at his jokes, seeing him smile (for real), the way his hands felt in my hair. I'm right, it was a good time. So what's wrong with him?
Without forming a single word, not even an apology, he opens the door and lets me in. I step inside and stomp the snow off my boots, forcing my teeth to stop chattering. I hear the door swing shut behind me.
"You look cold and angry."
I roll my eyes. "Thank you, Captain Obvious." but my words don't hold the same amount of conviction as they did when I stood outside, and there's no quip to follow up with. A million ways I could dig the knife into his ego, and I refrain from touching any. I hate him right this second, but I liked him two weeks ago. And even then, my hatred is quickly fizzling out.
He did let me in. If he'd wanted this over and done with, he would've slammed the door in my face, or let me down gently, probably with as much practice as everything else I've seen him do.
Well, not everything.
"Are you okay?"
I want to lash out at him, to cut him down with my anger and see what he does with the pieces that are left over. He doesn't deserve to leave unscathed. He doesn't get to take the easy way out.
But then there's something else, something eating away at me, telling me to calm down. I'm not a cruel person. I'm just someone who feels. A lot.
I cross my arms and shoot him a half-hearted glare. Some small part of me says I'm acting like a child, but some bigger part is overthrowing that because how dare he leave me so damn fast, without so much as an apology?
"No, I'm not okay."
My eyes wander up to his hair, the places where I laced my fingers through it, and realize that someone has messed it up. Something sour twists inside of me, and immediately I dislike it.
"Was she nice to you?" I ask, nodding at him. "The girl who messed up your hair? I think I was more careful than that."
Now I sound jealous. But I'm not a jealous person, I don't lower myself to that kind of standard. I'm better than that. Much better.
I bury my face in my hands because I don't feel like looking at him anymore. Because he's not supposed to know what a child I am. "You know what, forget it, forget I said anything." I shake my head, cross my arms again, press my lips together. "Just give me some kind of answer, so I know I haven't made a complete fool of myself. Why go to all that trouble? Why go through all of that, just for a kiss, and then ditch me?"
I pause, searching him for some kind of reasoning, however strange it might be. "I'm sure there's tons of girls in town who would give a lot more for a whole lot less."