Our new hope (Alice Weather)

ooc: not a problem the games are keeping me busy.

I hear people come in and out and Patrina is constantly fighting Hana to sit up and help me. I manage to roll over onto my back, and calm my sadness. I push myself into a sitting position as Katrine sits down in the corner of the room. Thatcher pushes the try of food that just fed Patrina towards me and I shake my head.

"No, I'm not hungry." I say in a rough voice, although my rumbling stomach would disagree. Thatcher watches me for a moment and then hands me a banana.

"Things will get better. I promise." He says. I can't decide whether his comment gives me hope or makes me want to punch him in the neck. Finally I just nod and pick at the banana. I glance down at Patrina, who is lying down now. I put a smile on my face, and brush hair out of her eyes.

"Sorry 'bout that. I love you." I tell her. This is all I have. My love for her is what will keep me going. That and Magdalene, who still needs me. Katrine has Thatcher and Jolia is so adored she hardly has time for me. I lean down and kiss her gently across the lips, ignoring the spike of pain across my heart.

We're both ordered two days bed-rest at the least. Something which I am in no way crazy about. Spending time with Patrina is something I will always enjoy, but it's hard for me to remain still. I don't see Twill, but once we hear her shouting at someone. Whether real or imagined I am not sure. I glance at Patrina after a particularly violent fit and grab her hand.

"We have to help her. I don't know what to do, there has to be a doctor who can make her better."

ooc: Oh god. I read this post like, the day you posted it and was like 'oh I'll post later tonight' and now here I am 13 days later.....grr at myself. I also apologize for the puny post right now....


As Patrina laughs I try to check her pulse, her pupil dilation, something. This can't be natural. I grip her hands, trying to pull her attention back to me. Then, just as suddenly as her laughter started, it stops and she glares at me.

"Danni, your hilarious if you think that you can just leave here and go to another district or the Capitol with out taking me with you. I'll be out of the wheelchair any day now. You are not leaving me here to worry about you." She says, turning her face away from me. I wipe the tears that form in her eyes away, forcing a kind smile onto my face. I can tell she's angry at me and now that I think about it, I should have seen this coming.

"Patrina, look at me." I say, my voice barely more than a whisper. Two of my fingers brush her cheek, guiding her eyes to mine. "Fine, you win. You'll come with us, on one condition." I tell her, my voice and face growing hard at the end of my words. I have to take a deep breath to calm my fears, and it's almost a full minute before I can say what I need to say.

"This is going to be dangerous, and no matter what happens, I cannot risk losing you. If I say run, you run. If I say hide, you hide. If I say, leave us behind and save yourself, you do it. If I say kill me and everybody else you have to do it. Do you understand?" I ask, my voice trembling. If Patrina doesn't agree to this, she can't come. I can't take the risk of losing her, or having her kidnapped. I wouldn't live through it.

In the morning when David tells us to get ready, all thoughts leave my body. I move like a robot, not even really processing what I am packing, by the time I manage to regain some focus I realize I have packed all of my socks, but no pants. After Patrina goes out to wait I have a mild panic attack, images of either her or Twill injured keep floating through my mind, locking my muscles into place and pausing my breath. I have to sit down on the bed and hold my head together for a few moments.

Finally, when I am properly packed and no longer on the verge of a breakdown I emerge from the room and go into the kitchen. It's quiet as everyone says there goodbyes, the graveness of our situation seems to weigh like a cloud on our brains. I wrap my arm around Magdalene's waist for a moment, bidding her a quick goodbye, as I turn away she grips my arm and tells me in a sharp voice, thick with emotion.

"You'd all better come back. Soon." I nod once, trying to fight my own emotions and move towards the door, holding Patrina's hand as I do so. Saying a soft, melodic goodbye to everyone. Thatcher, David, Katrine, Patrina, Twill and I step out into the dark morning air. It's only two in the morning, and the sky is still pitch black, the stars have come out in millions, and are splattered across the sky like teardrops. Stepping out into the damp grass we begin our journey. I hear a sniffle and glance over at Twill, tears are trickling down her cheeks, falling into the grass at her toes.

"I'm sorry." She whispers to no one in particular. Pain at her pain blossoms in my stomach, killing whatever appetite I may have woken with. I touch her shoulder gently, nearly ecstatic when she doesn't shrug me off, with my other hand I reach out for Patrina, knowing she won't be far from me. For a brief moment a flash of hope attacks me and I wonder if maybe, just maybe no one will get hurt. My hope is dashed in the next instant however when David approaches me, a grave look on his rugged face.

"I had to wait until we were out of sight of the house before I gave this to you, Hana made me promise me not to...but I can't let you go out here without protection." He says, pressing something awkward and metal into my palm. I glance down at the object and nearly drop it. It's a handgun, just the right size to fit comfortably in my palm, but with a big barrel. David also gives me a bunch of extra magasines and I shove them in my pack before they can make me ill. I was wrong, someone is going to get hurt.