Birthday Girl.

Maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

It was 2 days before the reaping and I was getting overly nervous and exicted. My nerves were frantic as I walked through the shopping center, in order to find some sense of tranquility in my world. Woman and Children bustled around me as I weaved through the crowd, hand in my pocket of my jeans. It was quite humid today, so I wore a short sleeved grey shirt and had a jumper tied round my waist. Slowly the crowd dwindled to a handful of people.

Soon I was pratically alone. The bustling city center was behind me and the quieter squares were in site. My feet had begun to burn, telling me that blisters were slowly forming from the friction between my foot and shoe. The uncomfortable feeling irratated me futher as I walked into a quiet square. Gazing round I saw a girl with pretty brown hair and chocolate brown eyes. If she wasn't tall and breathing I would've mistaken her for a china doll of sorts. She was occupying the only bench with a free space in the square, so I guess I had no choice.

Walking over I sat beside her, my feet screaming in relief from the weight my body. I glanced at her, reading over her shoulder slightly. She was prettier than I first assumed. Her hair was tied back out of her thin face, her dark brown eyes like marbles int heir sockets. Her skin seemed pratically flawless, well atleast on her face. There were a few scares along her arm.

Probably from training I thought.

She was pretty,Beautiful even. Though she seemed very young. Maybe 16 or 15. That was nearly 2 years younger than my previous self. I cringed atthe though of being 17. It meant I had 2 more chances to be reaped into the games. 2 more, larger but slimmer chances. To ensure that I had a better chance I had used all the money I had saved up to buy 3 terrasae. I sighed looking at the sky, thinking about Saturday....I knew I had to drive myself away from the thought of the reaping.

"So....good book?" I asked casually with a slight grin

Maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

I watch as the girl glances from me and to her book and back to me again. She seems nervous. Not many girls I know are very nervous, especially when they are pretty as this girl beside me. Each time her eyes connect with mine, they say something different each time. Cautiousness, Loyalty, Shyness and Bravery. Fair few emotions, some girls do not even have. Most of the girls I know are, yes brave, but with that comes a great deal of vanity and ignorance; making them not very nice people. This girl, however was different.

A few seconds after last glancing at me she marked her page and smiled at me. She had a pretty smile. Like most girls. Yet this one I didn’t take much of a romantic feel to. I never had really, except for a few I had dated during my last few years of High School. No, I didn’t like this girl in that way. I liked her because of the way her eyes talked, and the fact she was pretty and was reading in public without a care in the world. I liked this girl as a friend, of sorts. I didn’t even know her name yet.

"Yeah...I guess I'd say the same thing every other time I read it."

I couldn’t help but chuckle quietly to myself. Now I noticed the fraying corners of her book, how over read it must be. I didn’t read much, I had never taken a fancy to it myself. It bored me, like School. If I were to become a tribute, then I would have no need for school or reading. You did not need to know how to write or read during your time in the arena; you needed brainpower, and wasting that all on reading and learning was not a good thing. I looked at her, smiling still as the wind whistled through my hair.

“Book Worm?” I chuckled “Guess you like reading....”

Now to ask her name. This part of conversations were the worst for me- since I always thought it was rude of a boy to ask a girl her name; but I was getting fed up of calling this girl “Girl” any longer. I wanted to know her names, perhaps she wanted to know mine. I glanced at the sun, it was still high in the pastel blue sky. There was the rest of the day to talk with this, girl. Plenty enough time to decide if I liked her or not. I looked back at her brown orbs and grinned more.

“Names Thadeus- or Thade for short. What’s yours? Pretty? Book? Both” I mused slightly to her.

Maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

The girl kept staring at me- unable to break her brown eyes from my turquoise. She really was pretty, dare I say beautiful? No, course I don’t. I don’t love her, I don’t believe in true love- but do I? How can I be sure what love is? It’s too dangerous for me to get close to anyone, like I had done with Evan. I cringed inwardly at the thought of his name but the girl continued to smile broadly, showing her teeth. I smiled broadly back, letting my walls down. This, this was dangerous. For her, and my sanity.

"Um, my name is Jada. Nice to meet you, Thadeus."She smiles

Jada, what a unique name I think. Unlike mine, I have rarely heard this name. It makes me more intrigued about this girl with her brown hair and eyes. I can’t help but think that she is feeling rather uncomfortable from my presence, which is understandable. I must be twice the size of her in height, and three times heavier than her petite frame. Yet she hasn’t gotten up and walked away- she seems to be hooked on my eyes. I smirked glancing down before looking back at her smile; with softer eyes, trying to be a little less intimidating.

“Jada, pretty name for a Pretty face”

Seriously? I think the moment the words slip out my mouth. What an idiot I am. Calling a girl I barely know pretty, but at least I am being honest. Most guys I know wouldn’t call her pretty- they probably wouldn’t talk to her. As much as the girls- most of the boys in District 1 were vain. They forever thought they were the best. Yes I was also like this but at least I had some decency for Jada’s sake. I decide to steer away from my previous comment while quickly thinking about asking Jada a question about something else.

Maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

Jada blushed at my comment and I smiled a bit more. She leaned back against the hard wooden bench smiling at me as if to say she was flattered. I could tell she was happy and for some reason making this girl happier seemed to put me in a better mood than usual. At the same time of feeling happy, I was worried. This girl was pretty- sophisticated, as were I but I was different from her. If I told her about my parents, my condition, would she run away screaming terrified? Thinking like that made my heart contract painfully- catching me by surprise. Jada was really putting an impression on me, and I could feel it.

She was staring at me again, I could see the cogs turning in her head. I wondered what she was thinking of? I would only love to know. What girls thought of me was a complete mystery, most hated me because of my condition and what I did to Evan- but only very few know what I did. Others, like me but talk behind my back. Some don’t even acknowledge me because they are older than me, or whatever. It pains me to think that this is what Jada could be thinking right now- thinking she’s better than me because of social status or looks, or something weird like that.

Suddenly my train of thought is broken as she begins talking again "I don't recall ever hearing the name Thadeus. Thadeus Rain, reminds me of a raincloud. Take away some letter, and out some in, you're Thunder Rain. How cute.I wonder how your parents thought of your name."

Was that what she was thinking of? My name? Come to think of it, she did have a point. Yet, the end of that sentence makes my smile falter. I never knew my parents- and I would never know why they named me this. They’re existence was impossible to the experts of District 1 and it was like I had just appeared out of thin air. Their existence would never be found, the council had given up on the search long ago. I had given up hope on ever knowing who my parents were.

I looked back at Jada and was suddenly a wash in worry. She seemed cold and her cheeks were puffy and paler than they were a matter of seconds ago. She didn’t look too well. I frowned and carefully placed a hand on her shoulder, but retracted it when I realized what I was doing. I needed to take a step back and refrain from touching people I didn’t know. Shaking my head as if to straighten myself out, I watched as she began counting her money. I frowned a little bit more, wondering what she was doing.

"Sorry to change the subject, but i'm starving. Do you mind if we could go fetch something to eat? The foods on me."she held up her cash as she spoke

“Sure, but I’m going to have to decline on your offer to pay for both of us”I said reaching into my pocket pulling out my wallet “I’ll pay- if you don’t mind?”

I stood stuffing the wallet back into my pocket before turning to her, waiting for her for a moment before walking. I hoped she’d follow, as I crossed the square hands in my pockets. I kept glancing at Jada as we walked, she still seemed cold. Without a word, I took off my jacket and draped it over her shoulders in a blunt attempt to help her. I smiled and continued walking looking at the ground as I walked thinking about what to say next.

“I never knew my parents”Was the first thing that I blurted out “No one knows who they are- they abandoned me as a baby....”

I glanced at her, waiting to see her reaction.

Maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

I walked a few more feet before I realized that Jada wasn’t following me. I frowned and turned to face her. She looked upset, tears beginning to form in her eyes. A sudden burst of guilt washed over me. I hated seeing girls cry, it was a crime against nature. Slowly I walked over to Jada, a frown plastered on my face. I looked at her, beautiful face. The hurt look in her brown eyes made me cringe further. For some reason, Jada being hurt was worse than an average girl crying.

“I’m so sorry, I-I didn’t know” she stumbled
“Hey, Jada...its alright...I don’t really tell anyone that....” I spoke carefully “Come on you...lets go get food- you look like your about to faint.”

I carefully, cautiously, took her hand- in a friendly sort of manner. It was weird- when I touched her hand, I felt a slight burst of energy spin through my skin. I flinched away from her slightly but didn’t let go of her hand. I found that every time I got closer to Jada I felt something more for her. Something special. If only I knew what this mysterious feeling was. I knew there was a possibility it could be love but she was too young, for me. Wasn’t she? Well I didn’t want to get her hurt.

I just smiled a little before leading her towards the cafes. A lot of the cafes were very busy- full even- at this time of day. People chattered loudly, sipping at tea and eating biscuits but I knew a little place- a place for poetry and readers. A quiet place. I liked it- it put me in a good mood. The serenity of the cafe was calming, tranquil. We slowly approached the little shop. With its blue wooden framed door and windows. The quaint little white metal tables. I turned to her as we reached one of the tables.

“Do you want tea? Juice? Smoothie? Hot Chocolate...” I asked “Don’t worry- you can pay”

I chuckled winking a little smiling broadly at her.