A Week Later (Jack Lexington)

Josh is very persisten in his cries as usual after he had a meal, which must be hard to handle for a stranger so I offer. "I can take him, if you want to. Wanna trade babies?"

I've never even heard about lactose intolerance and wonder what on earth that could be. "I have no idea what you just said. He might be what?" My face gives away that I have no clue but I add. "Well, I don't know anybody with a goat so I can't switch him to goat milk." Plus I clearly doubt that that would make any difference. Why would one animals milk be any different than anothers. "If only he could have his mothers milk. Poor guy." It's really heart wrenching because I know that as much as he needs to drink the milk and enjoys it he will suffer for half an hour or longer afterwards.
"Yeah, mom knows a lot. She makes him this aweful herbal tea of karaway and fennel when she can find some but as it's getting colder herbs and spices are getting more expensive."

That brings us on to another topic. Why does my mother know so much about kids? "Not only is she raising my children but has brought up her own three." My gaze travels to a picture of our family on the wall when we're all still little. My hair was still light blonde then and I was missing a lot of teeth. I really like that old picture because things were still a lot more right back then than they are now.
"If you're interested in doing some research for your studies you could try finding out what could help his stomach. Just no experiments like with your knees."
I hand Faith Briar, whose eyes are already half closed and take my still whining son from her to walk him up and down the house, rub his belly and sing him a song. I don't know why but my aweful singing sometimes seems to calm him down. Maybe because it's a song I picked up at one of the pubs in town about a guy who drinks too much beer and falls over onto a pretty girl. Lucky bastard.

Faith really puts her foot in her mouth without knowing it but the loss of my brothers is so long ago that I've learned to deal with it. Noreen's loss, not so much.
"Yeah, those are my brothers but there's nothing to be jealous about. Trust me, you don't want to trade families." I'm really, really trying to hold back but other than my avox friend Devroux I didn't have a listener for too long so suddenly it all just breaks out of me.
"That's Mason, that Chase." With sorrowful eyes I look at their pictures. "They are both dead because the capitol took em from us. Chase was reaped and Mason executed in town because we stole food during a cold winter." I have to bite down hard on my lip to contain the anger I suddenly feel rising inside of me. That same anger that boiled up when Noreen got taken from me, the anger that drove me to drinking myself stupid so I wouldn't go up to one of those damn peace keepers and strangle him with my bare hands because of what they have done to me and my family.
"So is she." I squeeze through gritted teeth while I point at a picture of a young, beautiful girl in a single frame a little further over. "My wife Noreen got killed during the last games."
I can barely breath when I speak of her and feel tears of anger and sorrow spring to my eyes. If wish I could destroy the capitol. Bring those damn bastards down that keep ripping families apart. I wish I could just walz in and shoot them all.

The next second I realize that Josh is crying louder again and Faith is eyeing me strangely. My antiques are very dangerous in Panem as they could take me from my home any second and make my children orphans. So I take a deep breath and whisper with my face bright red. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't get so angry."
With that I turn away and hope that Faith is not one of those people who will run to the next best station and rat you out for a little money. She's too caring to be like that.

As soon as the words left my mouth I regret them. Not only am I opening up about something that I'd like to keep buried deep down below but also am I publicly announcing my dislike for the capitol. The worst part about it is that I might spoil the unaffected relationship with Faith by doing so. Now she will pity me and my children and not be able to take me for who I am any more.
Looking away I shake my head. "Im sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I don't know...I was happy to meet you and you simply didn't know anything about me. It felt good for a change. All those pityful faces, I can't look at them any more."

Her next comment takes me by surprise. Instead of regrets or pity she tells me that I wouldn't know what happiness means if I never got upset. That statement makes me look at her again and blows away my anger and resentment like nothing else. My hand reaches for her arm and rests there until I find what I want to say. "Thank you." I even manage a small smile and then turn to kiss the baby on my chest.

Instead of continuing this conversation I ask. "I'll walk you to your sisters school, okay? I could use some fresh air." Without waiting for her answer I grab my jacket and open the door, where the stroller with two blankets is waiting to be used.

When we're outside I explain. "I'm worried about my parents listening. They don't need to know every thing." I carefully place Josh who has finally settled down in the stroller and wrap him in a knitted woolen blanket.

I get the feeling that Faith doesn't want to give Briar out of her hands any more until she has to unless my little girl will start getting riding lessons at a very early age. To my relief she decides to put her in the stroller and we walk side by side down the unpaved street and away from the last houses.
If people around here didn't know me they might even think a normal couple is taking a walk with their child instead of two strangers bound by accident.
She breaks the silence before it gets uncomfortable and makes me laugh at the same time. "My favourite color?" I shake my head. "No idea. What's yours?"
Before she can answer a loud barking dog comes running towards us. I hope Faith is not afraid of dogs or this guy will scare her big time.
"Easy, calm down!" I lift my hand and clap it onto my leg for the dog to come to my side and then grab his collar. "Don't worry, Faith. This crazy guy here belongs to me. That's Storm. He's been goinga round town again looking for scraps." Dogs are rare in district 10 because a lot of people can't afford them and the only way I can is because he goes to all of our neighbors and gets fed by them because they love the furry mix.
Unfortunately Faith horse doesn't find Storm very amusing and is starting to back off and tear its head up in the air.

Storm doesn't sit down fast enough even though I've grabbed him which can only cause trouble around an easily spooked horse. I only hope it won't start kicking at Faith or the stroller with my kids but faster than I can get in between them it runs off dragging Faith along. "Let go!" I yell at her and run after the horse assuming she'll be okay.
It doesn't take long for the horse to stop but when I approched it slowly with my hand stretched out it trots away another few steps with an excited neigh.
"It's okay, calm down, silly horse, just a dog, caaaaalm dowwwn."
I don't fancy getting kicked or bitten but the mare allows me to approach her. With a slow motion I grab her reigns and place my palm on her neck to sooth her.
It takes a moment until her breathing gets calmer but then I lead her back to Cameo and offer her a hand. "Nice try, girly. That looked pretty funny. Are you okay?"

"Easy exercise." I tell her with a smile while I hand her back her horse. "Hold her for a moment." I ask Faith before I reach for Strom, who wiggles in my arms when I lift him up but soon gives in and lets me hold him. Carefully I bring him up to the horses head. At first she pulls her head away but when Strom stays still she calms down and finally tolerates him.
I ste him down again and tell him to go home, which he actually does.
"Is she not used to dogs?" I wonder when I grab a hold of the stroller and start walking again.
"Let me ride her and I'll get her to be a little mellower."
When I look at her again she's still got that cute smile on her face, that shows her dimples, which looks really cute and makes me smile as well. Faith is most definetly attractive. I hope she'll meet a nice guy who will treat her right just like I treated Noreen.