Danger in the air (Marree, Dylan)

I sit in the locker room floor, my arms draped over my bend up knees and take a swig from my water bottle. I take a breath deep and heavy and close my eyes for only a few minutes as I let my breaths come back to normal. I came in early like I always do and about this time, I am completely exhausted. I've been trying to work out my sore shoulder as much as I can. I got the stitches out just yesterday as well as the ones on my forehead. At least those were two things that was hindering me less. I didn't have to worry about ripping those out or having the questions from people who saw them. Truth be told, the stories behind the marks isn't nothing compared to the bruise that fades on my cheek. My life has been a complete wreck as of late. The last two weeks have been nothing but pure hell, except for those few hours of elation. I sigh.

Somewhere near the door to the locker rooms, I hear two girls chatting about their boyfriends and regular girl things. Their high pitched voices do nothing but annoy me to no end. They are the type that cries over broken nails and fuss over something that didn't go their way. The stupid stuff. I could care less about all that superficial junk. I've got much more important issues to deal with in my waking life than just crazy girl stuff. Like Matthew for instance. After four days... we finally meet after that day. Now, here we are days later and once again, nothing but random words here and there. Did I make a mistake that day?

I push the waterbottle down against the ground where I sit and hear as the girls leave the dressing room. Silence. Complete and utter silence and I'm loving ever bit of it. I lean my head back against the corner of the wall that I had taken refuge in. My eyes keep closed and I just relax before I need to head back out and get more time out in gym. A few minutes past by and something startles me awake. My reflexes jerk and I look up at the clock to see what time it is. I must have dozed off for a few minutes because its a few minutes past ten. I shake my head and jump up and return my items back to the locker. I shut it quickly and take one look in the mirror like normal. I see nothing but the image of a young lady who has seen better days. I move my hair a bit further down to cover the marks on my forehead and the disappearing bruise is hidden beneath some makeup. I take my eyes away from my reflection and leave.

In the gym, I see so many more people that I remembered twenty minutes ago before my untimely doze. I stretch out my limbs and pull on my arm gently, only flinching as I stretch it out and get it used to the movements. Today, I won't be throwing. I have decided on trying something a little more close ranged. I walk over and take up arms with a small sword; one that isn't as heavy as a long sword and walk over to the practice area that has been isolated for some reason. Perfect. I dont have to share nor do I have to wait for anyone. My own time.

I step up to the first dummy and stare at it's remaining limbs.

The dummy in front of me beckons me with it's armless torso and hanging head. Someone obviously already had it out with this guy. Some career with nothing but hatred or rage or someone who was trying to show off. I have no clue who was here, but I point the sword upwards and let the point of the sword make a small indention into the chest cavity when I hear a voice behind me. It jarrs me enough that it puts this cold chill down my back as I keep my stance. I don't move nor jump to his voice because I can tell right away whose it was.

Matthew.

I can't help but grin when he asks what I'm going to do to the dummy and make it run for its life. I can only image that he remembers seeing Joel and his chicken of a friend take off running after I threw one too many knives at him for his own liking. Today though, knives are far from what I need to work on. It's the close combat that makes me need to practice. Every single time I've had to fight someone or something, it's always been my downfall. I need to step up my game. I reply back to him.

"Well... considering someone's already taken off the dummies one leg, I'm sure he won't be doing much running. I guess I'll just have to fix that by taking off his other one to make a matched set." I refer to the leg still laying on the ground. I let my voice come out in almost this whispered tone. How long it had been since we had tried to talk last. The days in between our meetings has been far and I feel my heart tugging to him. He's stolen my heart for some reason and I can't get it back. What has he done to me?

Can I talk to you for a minute? My fingers that are on the sword flex a little as I let the sword drop from the dummy and turn around to come face to face with Matthew. I nod to him.

"Sure... what about?" I ask because I'm not sure what part of the conversation we are going to be partaking in. Does it involve Gala? Us? The cabin? Or Jins? I found out just yesterday that someone had tried to kill him more than a few days ago, but I had been naive to think of who it would be. I was just pissed that he was still around, especially after he showed up to training yesterday and hurt my friend.

~OOC: I'm trying to make this the most current, up-to-date timewise for the charries involved. This would be 7 days after Matt tried to kill Jins. 5 days after our group thread. (I feel they needed some time to heal before this thread. XD) Let me know if this doesn't work out.~

I comment on the dummies one leg, and make a joke about taking the other one off to make a matched set only to get this type of guilt when he makes me remember the wound I gave him that has caused him to quite a great amount of pain to walk. The knife that embedded itself into his bum wasn't healed. Well, it might be healing, but the internal damage had taken effect. Just like the one in his arm and the wound I gotten into my shoulder. Seems that we both have regrets now that that one day is over with, but I wouldnt' trade it for the world. Just for the simple fact that right now, we seem to be equals. No more harsh voice from him. No cheap shots. No stolen kisses... or any for that matter. It just seems like we are standing on the same ground.

I turn around to meet with his gaze after dropping the sword away from the dummy. I know we need to talk and I can't wait until this gets started because it's simply making me wonder what's going on through his mind. Now, of all times, he comes to find me. That must mean he ready to either talk about what's happened or dismiss me as someone he needn't be around. Without notice, not execting it at least, he apologizes and I feel my eyes soften to him. However, my voice doesn't match my soft expression.

"You should have stepped in sooner. I agree. Gala suffered. I don't know if what your trying to train her, but she clearly is afraid to fight and you fed her to the wolves." I say that word because of the experience we had. Not only did we battle one wolf, but that day, there were five wolves to Gala. I shake my head slightly as I feel him place his hand on mine.

"I hated seeing her in pain. Seeing you in pain, too... afterwards. I didn't expect you to just sit back and watch them terrorize us. Unless, you still have those same feelings about girls. Not liking them. NOt wanting to be seen with them. I can try to understand that. This can't keep going on though. Just let me know if you want to go back to the way it was before."

"I understand your need to let her show what she's capable of but we were outnumbered. If the situation was different. One against one, it would have been different. I wouldn't think any different of the way your trying to train her, but... there was too many for her. I could have dealt with it. I could handle it, but she's... she's not trained for that. She's not even ready for that yet. There's so much in common between me and her, but she's not had to deal with what I did. I don't want her to have to go through what I did." I tell Matthew and I feel my head lower with his hand still on mine. Talking to him right now is hard. I've barely known the girl. Barely even known him, but I can't deal with things as they come. I feel like I have to know... I don't want to waste my time on something that will never be. Then after he I express my pain of watching Gala get hurt, I listen to him so intently.

I nod slowly the entire time that I hear what he went through. Him and I, we've gone through the same circumstances to deal with the opposite gender, yet our stories are worlds apart. His life was full of women that stood him up, while mine tried to always beat me down. We come from two seperate worlds that seem to clash in all the wrong ways the way we had grown up, though, the way we deal with our hardships seems to have made our lives the way we are now. We are tough; cut throat even. We don't deal with normal drama like others would have. We make sure to take care of ourselves and somewhere along the way, we seemed to have found each other. Fate can be funny like that.

"I think I understand you, Matthew. More than anyone else can. We are two different people, that have grown up with two different ways of life and people that have tried to hurt us in very different ways." I feel something close to sorrow for our situations, but I don't want to feel sorry for the way we were both dealing with the world. Our past makes us who we are. Makes us into what we have.

"It's funny though, Matthew... that one day with you changed my life. I don't know if you can say the same thing... but you were good for me that day. Telling you about what was going on in my life. Thank you for letting me know. I guess, that I can't expect you to change just like that, but I do want to thank you for stepping in... late or not to protect Gala. It will make a difference for her to know someone is looking out for her." I look down at our hands and I just want to be able to hold his hand with different circumstances. Right now, I'm unsure of what to expect out of me and him. "Thank you for trying to protect me as well."

I grin at him suddenly though with a coy smile. "Girls aren't so bad... if you find the right ones you know. Not all of us are out to get you." I tell him and pull my hand away from his and I bring the sword up. "You know, what happened between us, I won't say that I didn't enjoy it, but I won't hold it against you if your not wanting to go further than that. I can't do that to you, just tell me now... it'll make it easier on both of us."

I stand there with Matthew, my head down a bit as I tell him my thoughts on what went on during the fight with me. How I didn't want Gala to go through the emotion and physical pain of someone tortureing her. I'm not sure that he got it until he asked about it. What I went through and then our conversation between us in the cabin. I simply nod to him though, because I wanted him to understand that I couldn't let Gala go through it. Although, all of the stuff that I went through has still been kept somewhere deep within my heart. He's only skimmed the top of my troubles.

"I don't want Gala to be afraid. She don't deserve to have that fear that she's got right now." I tell him and then the subject changed a bit more into a personal level. He mentions that he don't let anyone close enough to hurt him. I can understand that as well. I've never been able to do that either, but then again, Jins has always made sure of that. If it wasn't for him, I might actually have a relationship with someone and right now, I'm hoping for it to be with MAtthew. I don't know why, I want that with you, but so far... you're the only one that actually cared to know and went through great lengths and injuries just to find out why I got so mad at you that one day. You are different from any other guy and I can't ask you to change.

"You're not the only one that it happened to, though. Something about you... like I said before, I can't think of anyone better. Something about the way you are... makes me feel safe around you." I manage out for reasons that I don't understand. Do I feel safe around you? Just from that one day... even though you totally left me and gala hanging... at least you did put in the effort late. If you hadn't been there... I'm sure me and Gala would have gotten it worse.

Though, a moment later, I give him the ultimatum. A chance to get out scott from from everything that has happened between us. A chance for him to go back to the way he was. A girl hater. Someone who could go back to tormenting girls and steering clear from them. Though, the answers aren't what I expected to hear.

Look, Kyanite. I'm not exactly boyfriend material. That comment makes my heart want to drop down to my stomach. He's really wanting to get rid of what happened to us in the cabin. He's not wanting anything out of 'us'. He just wants out. And I gave him that option and as long as I said it first, I was going to have to deal with the reprocussions of it all by myself. I would have to deal with the heartache of the first guy who was able to intimately make me feel wanted and then be dropped off like I was yesterdays news. I felt my throat burn as he kept talking but it didn't seem to help. THis is the time I needed to be at my strongest. Not show my emotions like any other time. This time, my heart would stay locked away forever and the key will be lost. However, something he says seems to make me wonder.

I don't want whatever this is between you...and me to end. If only I knew what 'this' was? WE've hardly got anything right now. Just one day of pain and love and fear that was overcome in the timespan of just one mere day. Could there be hope for us? If he's willing to try? If I'm willing to accept who he is, even though I wouldn't want anything less than what he already is?

"No one is perfect, Matt... and I can't expect you to be anyone else or change for anyone. Especially me... I don't want to lose you either. I mean, I opened up to you. Told you things that I've never even shared with my family. I think you are the only one that will understand me and yet... I have no clue what it is that we have. What are we Matthew? Friends? Is that what you're trying to say?"

I look to our hands as he holds it. The feeling of skin on mine settles me a bit, but all of this is too much to be dealing with. I'm terrified of losing the one person that I've found that seems to complete me. I'm just unsure if I fit the same puzzle for him. Whatever happens between us, I'll accept it. I have no choice.

What are we Matthew? Friends? Do you think it will ever be more than just that?

I want nothing more than just to hear that he wants more than just friendship. That he might want to make something more out of what we were starting to become. WHat might happen between us if we were able to get past the awkward starting stages of whatever happened to us out on that first day where we discovered just how far our boundaries lie with each other. We take it to the limits. We go further than ever when it comes to what are are willing to do for each other. To protect one another. Comfort one another. Then, when I wait for his response, the first thing he says instantly makes my heart break into a million peices.

No. I don't want to be friends.

I almost take the next moment to let out a silent gasp when he suddenly takes his hand and reaches behind my head, his fingers combing through my hair and he pulls me forward into him. My right hand reaches up to his chest, palm pressed up against him as he kisses me. I kiss back with this newfound feeling that settles in my gut. The sword in my left hand drops the weapon and I bring my hand up to meet with his face as the kiss seems to be telling me what I was wanting to know. What this moment was telling me was that he didn't want to be 'just' friends. He wanted more. As he parts the kiss, he does more than just the to make me feel needed. He wraps his arms around me in a hug and I feel his breath in my hair. His arms around me that make me feel so protected. Comforted. I can feel his hard chest against my still sore cheek and I linger there for the moments that he allows it before he speaks again to me. I look up at him.

"I want all of you." A chill down my spine. I'm speechless. I close my eyes to him as our foreheads touch. This feeling is so much more different than what I experienced in the cabin. THis time, it seems more realistic. More sentimental. Everything about it screams at me to accept whatever happens and I'm more than pleased to think that we might actually become something meaningful.

"Matthew..." I say, because I'm truely speechless for once in my life, especially toward Matthew. Then when he mentions something about a look that I gave him, I had to be curious what the look was. Was it anger? Was it longing when we first met? He mentioned when they attacked Gala and it begins to make sense. It could only mean the one where I glared at him. The hatred that I felt when he allowed him to just sit there and feed poor Gala to the wolves. That day is gone though. Today? Am I still angry? Does that feeling still linger?

I enjoy the close contact with him for however long this will last. I lay my head back on him. I listen to his heart beating. I want this more than ever. I want this feeling of being wanted by someone that don't want to intentionally hurt me. However, somewhere in the gym, I hear some sort of commotion but back here in the cut off section from the gym, I don't really pay attention. I listen to MAtthew's explaination of what he's unsure of and I lift my head up to read his face.

"I know.. I've heard that rumor. I also believed it too because I can see the way you are. I've seen you at your worst with me, but I've also seen you at your best, so far." I nod to his question though about wanting that with him.

"I do think that just maybe, whatever happens between us, I would like..."

I seem to linger in his arms longer than I should, but how can I just pull away from him when he rests his chin upon my head and keeps this going? I swear, this feeling that settles in my stomch is of pure joy. It's something that I've not been able to feel before. Not with the way I've been treated by guys my entire life. Being wanted, loved or just simply to be needed has never been part of my life. Never have been able to get this way to someone without something dramatic happening. Some sort of interferrence to my happiness. Right now, I'm at that point in my life that I want this feeling to last. Will it though? I have just told him that whatever may happen between us, that I would like... for what? Do I want it to occur? Am I telling him that I will take whatever cop out excuse he's willing to give me. That I want to accept who he is and just be happy with what I've fallen for already. I don't want the perfect guy. I want one with flaws. I want to be able to be myself around you. I want to be able to scold you when you piss me off like I already have several times. I just want you, Matthew.

My thoughts run away with me when I look up at him to see the huge grin on his face. I return it with an equal smile, but on my face its clearly of confusion because I don't understand the reasoning until he speaks.

I'll try my best to be good to you. Does that mean what I think that means? Are you willing to give "Us" a try? To be able to become more than friends? You might just have to kick my ass when I don't remember that. I have to push my head into his chest in order to conceal the grin and cheap laugh that follows that statement. I move my head slightly, letting him feel the irony in his words. I bring my head back up to stare at him with the most serious of faces considering what's going on.

"Is that so? How about instead of kicking you're ass, I just threaten you with a knife again... I think that will more effective." I tease him heartily and I feel him squeeze me a bit then pull away taking my hand.

C'mon, let's get out of here. Too much sweat stink. I nod to him and he starts to pull me out of the gym. I don't look back at all. I don't even bother to mention the sword that I had dropped during our moment when we kissed. I keep my gaze fully ahead of me as I stare at Matthew's hand on mine as he leads me away from this public place. I understand Matthew's need for privacy. He doesn't want other to know what's going on between us. I can tell. This is all new to him and it is to me as well. Word likes to travel fast and given his reputation, I can only imagine the taunts that he'd get from his peers once they found out that he might actually like one? That is right? He likes me? Wants to be with me... just not in front of people? Will that bother me at all? Not to have others know... is that what a relastionship is about? Notice?

No! I deem myself in Matthew's shoes. What occurs in my life is mine. What occurs in his life, is his business. What happens between us, is our concern and ours alone. "Where are we going?" I ask out of curiosity, when we push through the doors to the outside part of the gym. The back part of the gym that we had orginally passed through when we went out beyond the fencing that one time. I have to be curious. Is he planning on going out there again? In broad daylight? Are we even dressed for such occasion if it comes to it? Even though we weren't dressed last time for that. It still has me curious as we keep moving. I make myself catch up to his steps and he never lets go of my hand. I'm curious if he's just afraid he'll lose me or if there is some urgency to keep me going.