Working through some issues (Marr)

"I want to take the hurt away..." My words hold so much emotion that I just can't seem to say anymore. It comes out and stops just like that. It's all I can give him and I'm not even sure it'll ever be enough. I don't know what he's going through. I don't know what to do to help him, but if he's not pushing me away, he's holding me tight and right now, I dont' want to be any where BUT in his arms. He's letting me have these moments with him. He needs me and for once, I feel like I'm doing something worthwhile.

Those words though seem to open up some part of him that he's been holding back so long. He's been too strong for too long and he's finally just had enough as the tears come pouring out over the edge, soaking into my shoulder. I try to hold him tighter, as much as I am able to with the bit of belly that's protruding out, keep us from holding onto each other like we used to when we needed to hug. I don't hold back though. I don't let go of him.

If anything, I hold tighter, afraid of any moment he may feel too much like a guy and stop.

His body quakes in my grasp. The sobs that follow aren't loud, but I hear how much he's breaking down and allowing me to take the burden off his shoulders. It's hard to hear him cry in front of me, but it empowers me enough to feel that I need to be strong for him, for a change.

"It's okay, Matthew. It'll be okay." I whisper out.

Time passes by slowly before he slowly recedes from me. Just as much as he's needed to cry, I have to wipe away the tears that have formed in my eyes unknowingly to be this type of support for him. He removes the tears from his eyes, but his face still shows the signs of the tears and the heartache.

"You already are, Kyanite. I love you." Instead of hurt and regret, that we've been doing to each other for the last few days, it's the exact opposite. He tells me he loves me, and gives me a kiss, sodden with tears and then takes my hand.

"I love you, too, so much." I tell him as he starts to lead me back to the house that we just left from. The place is looking a little better, I must say, though it still needs a lot of fixing up still to be done to it.

We enter the house, and I look around at how much this place has became our hideout and home away from home. It's damn and a little cold at times, but with the time that Matthew is putting into it, it already has more of a homey feel in it for him. This is something he's been working on for a while just because he needs to get a place of his own and have somewhere that Mira can come to when she gets older to visit her daddy. Somewhere near the back of the house, in one of the rooms that had been leaking from the room and the walls in shambles, is an almost pristine room with white walls.

"You said you want more. Do you know who this room is going to be for?"

In response, I have to question it, but something tells me it isn't going to be for a stray dog he wants to adopt. Though, my response is simply a shrug of my shoulders as I look around. Something else makes me wonder why he brought up something else I had said about needing more... showing more to me that he cares and loves me? Is this room mine for when I want to come over?

"This is going to be Mira's." It's my turn to let the emotions run free. This room... is going to be Mira's. Instead of just fixing up the house for Mira to come visit her daddy, he's set to work on one room, out of the entire house, for his daughters homecoming. A room for her to sleep in. I shake my head, placing my hand over my mouth and close my eyes, a tear or two falling so quickly. "And yours if you want."

"Damn you, Matthew." I mumble out and turn to him, needing to thank him for this gesture that I needed to see. It's almost too much. So much more than I was expecting and this was totally unexpected. "I had no idea. I had no idea..."

I release myself from him and take a step further into the room. I turn to each corner and place both hands over my nose, creating a bridge. "You didn't.. I wasn't meaning... I can't believe you did this... for Mira. For your daughter."

What exactly did he mean for me, too, though? Just to stay here on odd occasions? Should I ask? "Thank you for thinking of me. I don't know if I'd be able to let her out of my sight when she's born, and letting me stay when I bring her over. You'll come over to my house to stay, too, right?"