A new home (Marr)

"Are you sure it's not just because it's so big?"

My mouth drops a bit in disbelief that he would just come out and say that to me. Although, right now isn't the time to fight, I'm going to bring that up to him later. No doubt about that. Instead of mouthing off to him, I simply tell him 'No' with a stern look to him, but soften it a moment later. As for him being a scared father-to-be, I can't stay mad at him when he claims he is. I think we are both super nervous and scared for the sake of our little Mira's appearance and who knows? It may just be sooner than we expect. I hope not... I still need more time.

Something that I say, all of my nervous words has suddenly put this look of horror on his face. "Are you trying to say she could be coming? NOW? Are you having contractions?" I'm wondering if that's what this feeling is. It's never felt this strong before, just little ticks here and there, but did slipping out there do something more?

Without him leaning in for a hug, he's suddenly scooping me up into his arms and his reactions aren't helping to keep me calm. Maybe he knows more about this? I wish my mother was around at this moment. She'd be able to help me and to tell me what to do. I want her so bad.

"If there's any chance our baby is about to come I'm driving you to the hospital. What the hell? Now? I thought we still had a few weeks?"

"We do! We should... at least eight or nine weeks..." I wrap my arms around Matthew and I hate that he's carrying me, but I bury my face into his chest. I feel him carry me out into the blowing cold wind and into the truck. Without a hitch, the engine revs up and I scoot over close to him, wrapping my arm around his and before I know it we're driving off in this hell of a snow fall.

"I'm not ready for all of this... Matthew, I'm not my mom." I say absent mindedly. Fears start to bubble in my belly, making my heartrate react as well. I'm too scared to even think that this might be the day. If she's born too early, I've heard of the complications it can incur to the newborn. "Matthew, she can't come early. She just can't... what do I do if she is? What are we going to do if she decides to come...?"

I can tell that the thought of Mira coming early has him on edge, as well as myself. My nerves are rattled. I've got all these scenarios coming up in my head that is starting to make me feel even more uneasy. Things like her coming early to the pain and then some things that I'd rather not even mention outside my own head. It's a mother's fear that I think I'm starting to get. I also wonder if I am causing all this. What if it was something I've done. What if this is directly related to the stress and physical harm that I've been put in and the stress from it has caused my baby to not develop right causing her to be early? What have I done?

I slightly gasp and let out a tiny squeak of a scream when Matthew suddenly finds himself hitting the break and sliding just a little to avoid a tree that didn't see. Though, his language and tone isn't going to help in keeping me sane at the moment as he's plenty riled up himself.

"She won't come now. Okay? And if she does we deal with whatever that means. Stop freaking out... you're freaking ME out!" I'll try, but no promises.

He takes my hand and starts to comfort me, so I take it willingly and stop talking, but focus on my own body and how it's feeling. I know the doctor is going to want to know all the details, so I try to count when these uncomfortable feels occur. Upon the arrival, Matthew's in quite a bit of a hurry that I see him fall on the ice not but a few feet away from the door and get back up. All the while, I am alone in the truck and pleading with my daughter to stay a little longer.

Inside the hospital, we're pointed in the right direction of where we need to be and the nurse takes over for Matthew, telling him to wait in the lobby for a moment while I get checked in.

In one of the little rooms, I wait for some sign of life when they bring Matthew back and the moment I see him come through the door, I hold my hand out for him to take as the doctor comes in after him.

"What's going on here today, Ms. Kyanite?" He asks me, and pulls the file from the door to look it over. So I explain to him what I told the nurse about the cramping and the pain I felt right after falling. With a nod, he looks to Matthew for a moment and then back to me. "Well, Ms. Ruze, I suggest no more ice skating, for one. Two, no more working outside chores when it's snowing like this. That's just asking for trouble, little lady."

"Okay." I say and look to Matthew.

I didn't come to the hospital to get scolded, although that's the only thing that I get. The doctor isn't furious with me, but the way he tells me, in his tone, suggests that I don't need to do it again. I'm just glad that Matthew is here with me cause I don't think I can do this alone anymore. So many other times, I only wanted him to be here with me and finally, as the doctor asks if he is the father, I can see that proud look on his face. He's pleased to be able to stand next to me and tell me that this child is his. He's owning up to it instead of having to hide it for so long.

Matthew's concern over what's going on with Mira and my own body is exactly the words I want to express, but can't. Though, I listen intently to the doctor when he tells Matthew that he's fixing to check it all out. The doctor asks for me to take my shoes off and to pull my sweater up so that he can measure a few things. His icy hands touch my stomach making me wince to the temperature, but he pushes in several places and then grabs the device that I'm used to seeing and after a minute, is strapped around my abdomen. Just like that the sound of our little girl is put on to hear and to fill the room.

"Aww, Matthew!" I state, excited to be hearing the fast heartbeat. The declaration that the heart sounds good is giving him good vibes as he leaves the room for whatever reason. With the door closing, Matthew comes closer to me, never letting go of my hand.

"I think so... it's not as intense. Just kinda... there." I tell him and close my eyes for a moment and just breath. The silence and serenity of the room helps. The warmth also makes this a bit more enjoyable. That frightened look on his face is driving me to ask him. "Are you okay, Matthew? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you... this is all... frightening. I hope she'll be able to stay... I hope we have more time."

I pull on his arm to get him down to me and take him in a hug. My nose nuzzles his neck and I shake my head a little. "You're her father... tell her she's still grounded. She can't come out yet." I grin a little and let go of him. I place my hand on my stomach, outlining the device and revel in the sound of the little one filling the room with the heartbeat so fast and loud. The deep echos penetrating my ear.

A nurse comes in a moment later to get my vitals. I'm already so used to this that I don't even flinch when she pumps the cuff up a bit too much, squeezing my arm. "135/92. A little high, but it's to be expected. How about your temp?" She asks and uses the other device and then puts it back when the beep has sounded. "That's good. Doctor Warren will be back with you in just a few mintes. Let the machine take a few more minutes with you to get an accurate reading."

Once she leaves, it's just us two again. "Do you think she's coming now? Or... is it going to be like last time... when I was hurting?" I refer back to after Jins attack when it was merely too soon to have yet, yet the stress had induced a bit of contractions that was nothing but fake labor pains. I become optimistic though, saying in my head that this is all it is or I pulled something, maybe. "Mira, you are such the little troublemaker!"

Things seem to be taking a turn for the worse for Matthew. Nothing I say is helping and only making it worse enough that he finally declares for me to 'stop it' and only to consult the doctors words instead of my own. My words were only hopes, but he don't want to hear that. He wants facts and knowledge and truth and things that can be explained with 100% positive details. So, I do become quiet and try to relax even though his person is sending me these horrible feels. The joke he tries to express is funny in a certain way, but I barely smile and try to concentrate on what's going on with the doctor as he starts to read the scroll of paper in his hands.

"Looks like you're having contractions. Let's see if they have any effect." I nod because the fear is starting to prickle the back of my neck. What does he mean 'if they have any effect'? Don't that mean what Matthew is trying to say?

"She can't be born now. she's not due for another two months. Are you sure?" He's just as worried as me, but unlike him, I can't be asked to leave to wait out the diagnosis and am forced to watch him go. He tries to be strong and tell me that I'll be fine, but as he walks out the door, I get nervous even more. Once again, left alone to deal with something no one my age should have to go through. My fingers start to shake and I bite on my lower lip.

"Miss Ruze. Just relax, alright. The more stressed you are means more stress for the baby, okay? He's just outside of the room. Just a quick exam and we should be able to tell what this 'troublemaker' of yours is up to, alright?" He tries to calm me down and after a few minutes, he's marking a few things down on a chart and sitting on the chair beside me, once again, with his hand to touch my stomach in two more places. "Seems as though that's all this little one is for you and dear ole dad. Trouble. I don't suspect anything but some braxton hicks contractions and it's in your charts that you've had a few of these episodes. It's not uncommon. Most women will have these episodes almost throughout their entire pregnancy. Have you been getting enough sleep? Eating okay? Keeping yourself hydrated enough?"

"Not really. Hard to sleep when you can't get comfortable and you're back is constantly hurting." I tell him and he nods his head.

"Classic symtoms of being pregnant. Try to do some stretches or make that boy of yours give you some tlc. Might relieve some of that pain. Want me to relieve the father?"

"Yes, please. Can you bring him back in?" He nods and steps outside the door to pull Matthew back in with the wave of his hand.

"Son, can you come back in?" He steps back inside and we wait for Matthew to appear before he starts his revelation to Matthew. "You have nothing to worry about except making sure that she isn't over excerting herself. It's just a false alarm, alright? No baby today, so you can relax now. You're little one still has time to develop before she's ready to greet you two." He teases him, with a smile on his face and patting him on the shoulder. "We'll get her set up and ready to go here shortly and you can take her home, but drive safely out there. The snow's not easing up just yet."

He writes something on the chart and dismisses himself, placing the chart on the door and walking out.

"Feel better since you're hearing it from the pro? You got time, Mira's daddy."

The moment that Matthew walks back in, it seems as though it is all but a clear go ahead to get back home. The way that he reacts to the doctor's orders for me to take it easy is enough to make Matthew start begruding me any fun things to do. It wasn't my choise to slip on the ice or that the weather decided to bring on a heavy snow. I scowl slightly as my boyfriend talks to the doctor, asking if it's normal with what's happening and the false labor coming up.

"You'll know. The contractions themselves will be a lot more painful and will occur more frequent. Make sure you are timing them. If the contractions are anywhere from three to five minutes apart, then I'd make sure to get back here as soon as possible. Also, she'll know, my boy. It's just instincts."

He walks out after that, leaving us two behind and to look at each other with guilty and innocent looks on our faces.

"Thank goodness, I'm not ready yet." I beg to differ. "Don't act so cool now. You were freaked out, too."

"Freaked out that I might have hurt her. Yes. I feel... somewhat ready... maybe..." I try to look at him, even though he gives me one of 'those' looks and I dip my head down. "Fine. I'm not ready either. I'm glad that she's still got time to grow and stuff before we become parents."

The word I just spoke about being parents is something that I'll never get used to; a mom and a dad. Me and him? It just seems so farfetch'd. I don't know how either of us is going to handle the new role when it gets here. A year ago, we were constantly fighting both each other and in the pregames. It has been one heck of a year for us and the fun just keeps coming.

As I get dressed back (with some difficulties since I can't really bend over anymore with Mira to thank) I take Matthew's hand and we take our leave after this close call. No baby...

"At least I don't have to carry you. Almost put out my back."

"You calling me fat now?" I drop my mouth open while grinning at him and slug his arm lightly. "Thanks, Mr. Charm. I'll have you know, this little baby of yours has been throwing my back out for days and weeks now and I still have eight more to go. CAll it sympathy pains... don't feel too good, does it?" I ask him, laughing as we trudge through the snow and to the vehicle through the freezing temperatures.

In the truck, I sit on my side of the passenger seat while he drives and at a much slower pace this time. I fold my arms up in front of me while my eyes kinda just stare in front of us at the falling snow.

"Don't do that again, okay? You scard the crap out of me."

"Almost as much as your crazy driving was?" I tease, but I know what he's talking about. Again, how was I suppose to know that I was going to fall? This extra weight is shifting my balance and the slippery ground didn't help.

"Sorry..." I mumble and don't look at him. Instead my head leans over onto the glass of the truck and I keep myself all tucked in with the jacket around my arms and torso. "Sounds nice though. I think you should take the rest of the day off and just keep me warm is what I think you should do. Unless, there is something that I can do to help. Don't even give me that whole thing about not doign anything. I'm still an abled body and I will take it easy. Just don't make me feel useless these last few weeks, please? You know that I've never been one to just... lay down and take punishment."

I beg him. Plead with him. Even more so when I lean up and look to him, placing my hands under my chin (folded up with fingers enterlaced) and sticking out my bottom lip. "Please? I'm bored! I'll do anything you want. I'll paint something or cut something. Heck, I"ll even knit you a wool sweater."

The snow in front of us starts to lighten up just a little as the truck moves slowly but soon enough, we've made it back to the house and I touch the door knob and get out of the vehicle, shutting it and knocking some of the snow off that's collected on the roof.

"You know... the doctor mentioned something about you giving me a massage. Are you going to follow his orders as well?" I give him a cheeky grin, outstretching my arm and placing a hand on my baby bump.