your friends are gone, and your friends won't come|outlander

One day, he took his siblings on a small journey. His brothers had asked him to take them on an adventure; and he asked them where they wanted to go. They had said anywhere-- (“Anywhere, Sol!”) The voices still echoed in his mind as he found the voices to never be foreign as he is entangled with the voices, connected by the blood that they both held. He was a dreamer, anywhere could be anywhere- right? But he was forever locked down in his cell he'd been confined into- so where could anywhere be? Home?

The male of seventeen wasn’t sure what he was going to fall upon.

He could go anywhere in this cell, locked in by walls that won't let anyone escape unless if it had come to being their hearts had retired from their work and gone to their resting place, or being the last one to be able to face this swamp. Mucky old swamp. Dirty, muddy old swamp. A place where every step someone would take, a moisture of the wet and mucky ground would place up against their toes if they had nothing covering them. Where they've been destined to kill twenty three (though as the cannons started to fire on by, it seems it had dropped to twenty. He felt as if everything was going to be fine for him-- it must be right? Though from the effects of throwing a shoe he observed it wouldn't be alright.

He wants to go home. Sol missed the night sky as it was, he missed the dancing under the summer Sun that he'd been named after. Is that anywhere? Is going home a place where anywhere could be, even located in the dreams that shouldn’t interfere with his thoughts and hopes of what he aspires to become true? He missed home like anyone else could be doing, though he feels as if the small family they’ve conjured makes it seem replaceable with their childish ways. It made him feel young again-- filling him with joy in happiness of the childhood he felt he needed once more.

He missed taking his siblings on journeys like this one, however they are siblings as bound to the same truth and loyalty. Bound to the same heartbeat that they all want to keep alive (their own). Sol Shim sees a girl and he was not afraid to start at her, no matter the consequences. For the vengeance of a small girl and boy, he wouldn't stop to think about his motives.

(His mother always spoke of doing what felt right, but if this was right he might as well consider himself lost from his mother’s teachings.)

[attacks celia mortuus, spear.]
6Buv_OvNspear
[result]
3118 -- Shallow Cut on Left Calf -- 3.5 damage

He felt as if his hands were being controlled by the shaking of the earth, the violence of the shivers that thrilled through his hands as if practiced and mastered with ease. Always brought to the confined walls that kept him inside, the chains that kept him forever latched to the arena he’s been placed in he would not have time to practice the methods people once told him to be true (though, ‘Ma said to tie his shoelaces for luck and that hadn’t been true).

A thump, thump thump echoed through his veins, coursed through it as the electricity that sparked inside of his mind went wild- his eyes never wanting to settle down on a single prey of theirs to rest upon and find a calm reassurance in that everything would be fine. The male felt as if he were to be close to a doe, however he is not being hunted. The male doubted this thought for like everyone else, they were all just waiting for the exact right moment for them to hop in and claim them as their prey.

He feels as if the event isn’t that foreign to Luna’s falling, the way that those people who had claimed the Cornucopia as their own making themselves grow eager in the horizon of trying to make people fear them-- to show that they were a show of superiority. However, Sol didn’t think of it like that. He saw it as trying to play their own game that they’ve all been confined to, a game of kill or be killed (though a dreamer hoped that he didn’t kill the thoughts he had that were full of peace; he wanted to save his happiness).

He wished he had never killed the servant. He didn’t feel like that was him- Sol wasn’t one to crush someone's dreams but he had, he had crushed the head of another and had ended the very possibility of the brain being able to function as he had crushed that too. He couldn’t register much through the roaring adrenaline that pumped inside of him, the intensity of the entire event growing too large for he.

So, taking his sins and chains and shackles that rested with him or within, Sol would try to run as far as he could, calling upon the crazy that he’s grown to adore as she is childlike in a way. ”Astrid! Come on, he’s just asleep.” (Thatd what Ma told him when Luna died.)

He’s just asleep- off in his own world where he’ll be forever safe and the small boy from two won’t have to worry about fighting for victory for he has won, he is never to step another foot in this arena as a person forced to play the bids that they’ve placed, to play the games they’ve been created.

Anything to break himself from the actions he’s been accustomed to.

[sol shim flees the thread]