tripping over some garden wall or some shit [l/a/c]

I'm holding hands with danger — guess I never learn.

Rationally, I'm aware that the girl following behind me could turn on me at any given opportunity. For all of her softness that I can see on the surface, I'm unable to confirm any of it as true. She certainly wouldn't be the first tribute to manipulate their opponents by feigning weakness, but when I glance over my shoulder and meet her large blue eyes, it's like seeing a lullaby in color. I'm playing the hero, but she's the one making me feel safe.

And, really, there are worse ways for my story to end.

I could save her from death, and she could drive her blade through my back. It'd be terrible for a short moment, and then what? Good for her, honestly. People survive in different ways, and I try not to mock them for that. I can only imagine what the audience thinks of me, if the Capitol hasn't already thought of some way to erase me from the narrative completely. For the rest of my life, however long it might last, I'll always be the person who ran.

Even now, despite everything I've learned, I come to a stop when we cross over the bridge. I look up at the sky, staring at the spot directly above my head and lowering my gaze to the horizon. For some reason, I continue to hold the stranger's hand. As nice as the warmth is, what I'm really grateful for is the tether. It doesn't matter if I still feel the pull to run away — there's more than just me on the table now. I still have to find Gavin.

"I'm Cecily," I half whisper to my companion, forcing myself to turn away from distant freedom and focus on the present. Not too far away, I notice a trail branching off from the bridge, and I nod in the direction of it. "You don't have to stay with me, but I'm heading that way if you're down for it." The silence grows tense for a moment, in the way that I have always been painfully awkward. I fight back against it.

"It's better to go together, right?" I fall back through time, remembering how close Beau and I had been to the district's edge. He was so ready to follow me into the unknown, and I refused him. Sometimes, when I'm alone with myself, I like to reflect on that decision. I know I was right to turn myself in, and I remind myself of that often, but it's not awful to consider what could have happened in a kinder world. I can see the trees all around us.

And it feels familiar.

The stranger later names herself Aneesa, and perhaps against our better judgement, we choose to go forward as a unit. At least until I can find Gavin, but even then, I already feel a quiet attachment to this girl. Stubborn as I am, it's hard to believe that I could abandon her after this. We navigate the path I had pointed out, steadily approaching an electric fence that seems to have the island surrounded. I can't help but wonder what it's meant to keep out.

Or in.

The sound of approaching footsteps pulls me away from my thoughts, and I force us to come to a halt as a figure emerges from the distance and charges right at us. We watch in suspended silence as he falters to a stop, fist closing around a pistol and raising it up as if to threaten us. "You okay?" My eyebrow quirks instinctively. "Y'alright?" I drop my gaze to his gun, and it seems to click in place for him that this is hardly welcoming.

"Shit, sorry." He rushes to lower the firearm, walking closer to Aneesa and I as he fumbles to put it away. "Wh-what happened?" he struggles to say, and even I wince when I recall the way the earth had seemed to shake when the cannons started to fire. I counted four of them in succession, and each one struck fear into me. I refuse to linger on the possibility that any of them could have belonged to my district partner.

Hope has always been my double edged sword.

The boy has managed to trip over himself before I can even respond, and though I trust that as of now he means us no harm, I don't hesitate to reach down and grab his misplaced weapon for myself. I keep the barrel pointed at the ground, only intending to remove the threat. "Four people are dead." It's all very matter of fact, but I'm not sure what else to say. "Beyond that, I don't know the specifics. When we fled, no one had died."

Sighing, and damning the consequence, I place the pistol into my back pocket. Crouching down, I offer the stranger a hand. A voice inside of my head tries to remind me that this is ridiculous, that I can't keep showing my enemies gestures of peace. But there's another that sounds just as logical, urging me to realize that no one can control what I do in this arena. It's my choice whether or not I'm cruel. During the bloodbath, all I could bring myself to do was harmlessly shove the boy who broke Aneesa's nose.

Even when my fingers closed around the hilt of my machete, I couldn't use it against him. We were lucky that he got distracted when he did, and that's all there is to it. If Aneesa has any gratitude towards me, I don't know how to tell her that it's unjustified. Smiling weakly, I open my palm to him, and I offer to help him right himself. "Looks like we're going in opposite directions, so don't mind us. I won't chase you if you don't chase me."

Let him try.

Let them all try.