la vie en noir ; beck & talon
May 11, 2022 19:34:13 GMT -5
Post by ᴥ on May 11, 2022 19:34:13 GMT -5
B E C K .
What a terrible way to die. The thought sticks to the back of his throat, turning cigarette smoke sour as it coils in his lungs. Caged in a machine so easily mistaken for salvation until it steals your final breath. Packed in a room with a dozen or so strangers he can't stand, Beck finds a strange sympathy in unorthodox chains.
At least he was alone in the eye of his storm, at least there he felt safe enough to unravel. Everyone is looking at Talon right now, and they've made sure they know that.
Nine days built up to a single, inconsequential second. Talon's dagger sinks into Ellis Gallagher's mech - nothing more than a macabre glint beneath neon lights.
The canon that follows is deafened by the roar of gluttonous pride around him. Beck watches as they tear what is already half dead to pieces, eager to claim scraps of Talon's victory as their own. It happens every year, but watching the vultures descend twice in a row has left him pissed off and a little bit nauseous.
Beck exhales a string of expletives alongside toxins, ducking under a camera lens and shoving its operator back toward the buffet table. Acting out is no longer weakness, all anxious thoughts and desperate attempts at escape. These days Beck has found himself hoping to hurt. There's all this anger in him and he's still searching for a single fucking outlet.
"Where are you going?" Someone, a stranger or a friend he can't tell over the roaring in his ears, calls out to him.
"To make sure Talon is okay."
At first Talon hadn't been their own person to Beck. It's a shame but it's true that every time he looked into those eyes he saw Turner. Talon was nothing more than the ghost of one of his victims, a grotesque reminder of an earlier fuck up. Maybe the fame has made him self-obsessed or it was just easier to make Talon into something he'd already lost.
He thought he'd done well enough this time around, then Talon fought Parker and, of course, he realized he'd come to love them both in spite of it all. That was the worst night he'd had in a while so he tries not to dwell on the details.
This is all new to him, this weight in his chest turned to restless pacing outside of the infirmary door. Annie hadn't been around to help him and Nixie hadn't needed his support.
Talon - he wants to protect Talon. He thinks, at least, that's what this feeling is. He doesn't to watch those wounds scar over, knotted tissue to hide all the exposed nerve and open emotion that makes them the only victor in District Four worth a damn. Talon Grey is genuinely good and Beck doesn't know what to do with that.
"You're cleared for entry, Mr. Hailsham."
He levels the nurse with a glare, always eager to shoot the messenger - "No shit, I'm their mentor."
No less restless than he was outside the room, he quickly realizes it's still a fucking waiting game. With a long suffering sigh, he pulls out the chair beside their bed and winces at the way it shrieks. "Sorry." He apologizes to thin air because it feels like the right thing to do. "For the noise. I mean. I didn't want people apologizing to me after I-"
He chastises himself, picking at the sheets beside Talon's hand because he doesn't know if the new victor would even want that comfort. "What am I doing?" His exhale breaks into a nervous laugh, six years is an exceptionally long time to go on being the same kind of useless. "You can't even hear me I'm just,"
He thinks of the day he woke up and all the parts of him that were still in that jungle. Of the nights she still calls him back to her. "trying to fill the silence." And everything that may hide within. "It doesn't feel real, yet. I don't know what to do now that you're back." He sinks his teeth into his cheek, more honest than he should be because there's no one to hear, "I'm so glad you are, though, Talon. Thank you for coming home."
[elegant]
