attis murdock / d4 fin

i.

He's fifteen years old and wearing one of his father's old ties.

It's crooked, and it's an ugly shade of brown, but Nicky had stood in front of Attis and tied it around his throat in the dank light of the Justice Building's bathroom, so that's where it stays.

Attis's job, his father had explained very quickly and very quietly, was to help him convince the jury that he was a little boy that came from a stable, loving home. He's not allowed to mention the lights going out for weeks, or the freezer losing power for days and rotting all their stored up meat. He's not allowed to mention his father's disappearances or his benders or the fact that for the past three years, Attis has actually been the one running the house.

Instead, Attis sits up on the bench very bravely and tells the court about Nicky helping Ariadne with her homework, Nicky teaching Gin how to swim, Nicky making Cade's birthday cake and making sure the icing is his favourite colour. He says Nicky was the one that fixed their scraped knees and broke up their fights and took them down to the beach every weekend to look for shells. Nicky is the one that sets curfew, and Nicky is the one that stays up late worrying when someone breaks it.

He doesn't even look guilty, sitting there. Nicky's smiling as he listens. He looks proud.

Attis' shoes are too big and his pants are too short, and he hasn't had a haircut in two years. This is the first time he's seen his father in weeks, but the court seem to believe him.

They're fine, they win. They get to stay together.




ii.

He's seventeen years old and wearing one of his father's old ties.

In less than two years later they're back in front of the judge. Nicky's a repeat offender now, and that makes the situation more dire. The prosecution starts tossing out words like neglect and mismanagement.

Uncle Oleander is trying to take one of them away, and he's decided on Cade because everyone knows that Cade is the only one Nicky actually cares about. It isn't like with Attis, where the love he receives is in direct correlation with his usefulness.

When they stop for break, Nicky pulls Attis into the privacy of the stairwell to ask when Ariadne's birthday is.

Just in case they ask, he says.

Attis leaves him there to have a panic attack behind a bust of Leon Krigel.

They lose the case.




iii.

He's eighteen years old and wearing one of his father's old ties.

He's the one who's called the hearing this time.

He's been trying to get Cade back for months.

There's letters upon letters stacked on the kitchen table back home, all memos stating that the court date is being pushed further and further back.

He's got notes from Nicky too - everything from pleas to demands. It takes every bit of restraint for Attis to just say 'yes, of course, of course I'll help' instead of screaming himself hoarse trying to remind his father that he still has three other children to turn to and help raise. But of course that's not an option, and of course it's Attis gathering the evidence and scouring the law books and trying to find a loophole in a loophole.

Attis is aware that Nicky still blames him for Circe's case - it only took him four fingers in the bottle to admit as much. He'd finally barged back home after the custody papers were signed and Attis had shushed him because Gin had a big midterm in the morning. They'd gone outside to fight instead, Nicky accusing Attis of lying and testifying against him, Attis accusing Nicky of using Circe to replace Cade, just like he had used Cade to replace the rest of them. Then Nicky started crying and Attis didn't know what to do so he just went back inside and left him there.

But he's a sucker, and he still remembers his father being so proud of him after that first case, so Attis eventually does file the summons. He ignores the fact that footsteps start to follow him home at night. He ignores that, for nearly every preliminary meeting, his uncle seems both surprised and annoyed that he's made it on time, or that he's even made it at all.

The only thing they really have is that Attis is legally an adult now, and so legally Cade's guardianship can pass to him. His uncle practically laughs him out of the room when he first presents it. The lawyers all follow.

They lose the initial hearing. It's dismissed easily in the face of Orleander's influence, but Attis expects that.

He gets the note from Nicky, stuck in the screen door because the man's become too much of a coward to even show his face now.

Please.

He'll just try again.