flop from the top / open!
Sept 29, 2024 12:56:00 GMT -5
Post by andromache s. ⚔️ [d1b] sucy on Sept 29, 2024 12:56:00 GMT -5
andromache stewart
In the Stewart household, books served no purpose unless they were instructional. From as early on as I can remember, my mother only ever read to me from picture books that doubled as first aid manuals and diagrams of essential arteries. Enrichment and training were one in the same for me. They were supposed to be, anyway.
The main floor of the training centre is driving me nuts. So much clattering -- from the clash of steel on steel to the clanging of lower district's clumsy untrained hands dropping their weapons every two seconds -- I couldn't think in there. That's the issue. The noise. The noise is the issue. The noise and the chaos and the fact that nothing I do seems to be working for me. My hands and eyes may as well be on different sides of Panem with how impossible it seems to coordinate them these days.
I just have to trust that this is a blip. A minor issue. I'm somewhere unfamiliar for the first time in my life. Everybody's nervous, even Eulalie I bet, underneath all the beauty and grandeur. Those things, too, I find crowding my mind. The elevation of aesthetics here isn't dissimilar to how we treat our own celebrities and heroes in One, and when I first arrived, I even found it comforting. I understood instantly what we in One simultaneously were emulating and constructing via the entertainment industry's output. But now, days in, I'm finding it overwhelming on the eyes, on the little stomped out remains of my heart.
I miss my home. I miss my bed. I miss my wallpaper and my sword and all of it, even if all of the equivalents I've been given here outrank them in some form of quality. That doesn't matter. They aren't mine. The only things that are are the tiny disc resting between my collarbones and the chain it's attached to. So small, the same as I am.
Screw it. I'm going to read a book for fun, and it's going to be relaxing.
I stomp my way up one of the library ladders to get something from the top shelf, where I can only assume the most scandalous of what made it through their filtration systems are stored and slide out the first book I find with an interesting title.
Except it slides off the shelf... and straight out of my hands.
Of course it does.