Prim: Behind the Smile (PRIM ONESHOT)

"This is all my fault," Prim said to herself, jabbing a pencil against her palm. Tears stained her pillow where she had gone to cry after her sister had volunteered for her in the Hunger Games. She had spent hours hovering over that one pillow, allowing a large river of tears to make it's way through her eyes and onto the fabric. The fabric was terrible to sleep on but Prim took it as her punishment for what she had done to Katniss. She had pretty much killed her. She had killed her own sister because of a drawing.

"This is all my fault," she repeated, shaking her head solemnly. She gazed down at her hands, red with scars that she had recently applied with a knife her mother used for her healing. The scars stung with every teardrop that passed down them, as if it was a constant torture for what she had done to Katniss. The scars burned a more deep color of red as tears passed over them. Her eyes glittered by the sunlight that filtered through her window, making her look happy, but inside she was really full of sorrow and dread.

"She is going to die because of me," Prim said, stabbing herself once again with the pencil she had taken from her bedside table. Warm liquid came through the wound and stained her olive colored skin with red. What was she going to tell mother? The blood went past some of the scars left by her knife and it stung with a raging fire. She now knew how Katniss would feel but she would feel it 100 times worse than what Prim was inflicting on herself. Katniss was going to be tortured by the Capitol. She was going to die no matter how much Prim hurt herself.

Despite the thought, she picked the knife up from her bedside table and studied it, death in her eyes. She intently gazed at the sharp edge which was stained with her maroon blood. Prim flipped her hand over and gazed at her wrist which was perfectly untouched. She had mainly been going after her palm which she thought would hurt more ... but maybe just a swift cut across her upper wrist would hurt worse. There was only one way to find out. She quickly swiped the knife across her skin, bringing blood to the surface.

Tears pushed against the walls of her eyes, begging her to release them, but she simply blinked her eyes and tried her hardest not to look at the blood spilling over her bare arm. She could feel the blood rushing down her arm and down her hand before dripping on to the floor. She felt the warmth of the liquid, the gooey feeling. She allowed the blood to make a pile on the floor, before whiping it up after the bleeding in her arm ceased. She wanted to smile because the worst of the pain was over but she was not happy. She would not be happy unless Katniss won the Games.

What were the odds, though, that Katniss would win the Games. She had been sent into them with a freaking pastry chef. How was he supposed to help her? Throw pies at the enemies? He wasn't even stronger than Katniss! He was nothing but a slimy, lying, little spoiled wimp. Sure he might have been cute but behind those glowing eyes of his she could see, almost sense something off about him. Maybe the way he looked at the camera, or at Katniss. Maybe even how he walked was giving away his deepest, darkest secrets ... and his desires.

Tears once again pushed at the edges of Prim's eyes, threatening to pour out onto the floor. She remembered all of the good times Katniss and her had had together ... how much fun they used to have .......
Prim ran through the house, screeching at her mother than Katniss was going to get her. Her grin was spread out all over her face and her eyes shimmered with delight. She ran around a chair and hid behind it, looking below it to see Katniss's feet approaching. They were playing Hide-and-Seek. "Hey, mom, have you seen Prim?" Katniss asked smiling. Oh, the fun Prim and her had. Her mother shook her head and went back to reading whatever she had in her hands.

Prim giggled with delight as Katniss walked past her, not giving the chair a second glance. She walked through the hallway, looking left and right, and went into her own room. Prim got up from her hiding place and laughed again, pushing the chair into the table. She approached the hallway and peeked around the corner, grinning wildly. Katniss popped out from her room and yelled, triumphant, "FOUND YOU!" Prim giggled and tried to run away, but Katniss was faster and had reached around her stomach, tickling her ribcage.

"I love you." Prim said, smiling up at Katniss, her eyes clearly showed how much joy the sight of her sister brought her.

Those were the good times. Oh the memories. She would never have those again ... not with Katniss. Realizing this she sobbed into her shirt, releasing the tears she had stored up. She felt their cool touch as they slid down her cheek and dropped to the ground. She ceased her crying only for a moment to say four simple words that were directed to Katniss, wherever she was. "I love you ...... Katniss."