Zombie Apocalypse Plans.

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Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 7, 2010 3:33:20 GMT -5

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Post by Anarchy is BACK!! on Sept 7, 2010 3:33:20 GMT -5

As the title states, this is for any plans for the far fetched zombie apocalypse. You can be serious or plain comedic, but I am laying down one rule:

-Please make it somewhat realistic. This means no going around with just a gun blowing zombies to bits.

Easy, right? I am going to post mine separate from the rule post. So have fun...and obey the rule.

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Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 7, 2010 3:52:11 GMT -5

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Post by Anarchy is BACK!! on Sept 7, 2010 3:52:11 GMT -5

Wanderer67's Zombie Apocalypse Plan. (as if my family got caught outside and died or became zombies)

Okay, here is what I would do. I would key in the code for the gun safe that holds two pistols and take the ammo bag with me. I would then pull out of the garage in the Mustang and drive until I reach the nearest Sports Chalet.

I would take out the zombie workers with the .357 magnum revolver (one of the guns I grabbed at home) and lockdown the store. I would spend the first couple of months here, living off of freeze-dried food and stocking up on supplies such as propane tanks, stoves, and matches. I would also stock up on weaponry (compressed air tanks, aluminum baseball bats, harpoon guns, knives, etc.).

When my food stocks run low, I will take out the growing mass of zombies with a deadlier version of a Molotov cocktail made with a white gas canister. Then get into the Mustang and head to Big 5 and raid the weapon stash, taking anything over .30 calibur and at least 12 gauge shotguns.

Then move my butt over to Costco to meet up with any sane survivor left and stay there except for maybe a trip to a military base that has been deserted to raid the weapons stash and MRE stash.

I hope you enjoyed reading and I hope to find others replying with their own versions.

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Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 7, 2010 4:01:19 GMT -5

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Post by magnet on Sept 7, 2010 4:01:19 GMT -5

OK I am going to follow the zombie survival guide plan (it is a real book look it up but, fake story) I am going to take my dad's boat. Next, I am going to sail out to 12ft. deep water. the only way to kill a zombie is to destroy the brain. Me and my friends will go out and take the weapons the book says to. Pick either a katana sword or any semi auto gun. Never go full auto it wastes bullets in my opinion..

P.S. great plan.

Last Edit: Sept 9, 2010 2:42:03 GMT -5 by magnet

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Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 7, 2010 19:08:33 GMT -5

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Post by ~Kayla~ on Sept 7, 2010 19:08:33 GMT -5

If this was real I can tell you right now I'd probably die within the first week of there being an outbreak. (I'd even put money on it.)

BUT if I didn't die here's what I would do:
Try to locate my older brothers, both of which live in Denver, CO and see if they were zombies yet. Then I would go to the nearest huge gun shop and get all that I could carry. All along my Rhodesian Ridgeback would be at my side, warning me of any funny things going on around me. Then me and whoever I could find would haul ass to the nearest Military base and try to find help. If that didn't work I would so go to coast and steal a giant yacht, sailing to the Galapagos where I will spend my days in isolation, eating those Galapagos Iguanas.

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Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 7, 2010 19:33:01 GMT -5

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Post by phunke on Sept 7, 2010 19:33:01 GMT -5

It's funny, we were just talking about this in Chem class today. [Our chem room has a fire extinguisher, a fire blanket, several showers and an eyewash as well as many, many hazardous chemicals so we were joking during a fire drill about how we could withstand a freakin' zombie apocalypse.]
Anyhow, yeah. I would pretty much chill in my chem room until all the zombies in our school [I'm pretty sure my principal is a closeted zombie already] left to find better prey. Then, I'd find my bff, zombified or not, and climb out of a window just for fun. Then I would go to my house and eat skittles while playing Super Smash Brothers. I'd probably also update my facebook status and go on here to do a couple tutoring threads.
After that, I would undergo the transformation to my superheroic alterego. After ridding the immediate vicinity of violent crime, I would embark on a comic-book-worthy adventure with my BFF to cleanse my town of zombies. I'd probably ride my dragon and she could borrow my unicorn. Then we'd fly around and shoot zombies with cathode rays obtained from the chem room.
Then...
WE'D HAVE A PARTY!
WOO!

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Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 8, 2010 22:54:34 GMT -5

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Post by Jasik on Sept 8, 2010 22:54:34 GMT -5

To begin with, I would run outside. Zombie neighbors would come at me, but I would run past them and pull at the handle of my dad's sick Audi Q5 -- only to realize I left the keys inside. I would then run back inside, grab the keys, then run back outside, starting up the car. I would speed out all awesome-like, running over zombies and cackling madly. I'd probably end up crashing the car into a tree due to my limited driving experience and the fact that that one zombie got caught on the windshield and blocked my view. Damn zombies, always getting in my way.

Shockingly conveniently, I'd have crashed right next to the local Market Street. I'd jump out of the totaled car -- my zombie dad is totally gonna ground me -- and crash through the window of the store dramatically, rolling to my feet guns blazing. Oh wait, I don't have a gun. Dammit. Well, there are zombie shoppers coming at me, but I roundhouse kick the sushi guy in the face and take his knife. It's kind of disappointing, really. I always liked that guy. He knew exactly how to make my sushi. Anyway, I'd stab him in the brain and we'd zone out as if it were Assassin's Creed II, in which he would make a dramatic speech telling me the secrets to the conspiracy against my family. But since he's a zombie, it's more like a garbled "Bluuuurgggh... blargh braaaaaains gagogogk." Then he'd be dead and my new knife would be stuck in his rotting skull. Dammit. Again.

So I'd be trapped behind the sushi counter, zombies pressing into the corner, when I'd suddenly get an idea. I won't go into detail, but chopsticks plus eye sockets equals dramatic pwnage. Anyway, I'd have cleared a path, and I'd take off running down the aisles, grabbing some angel cake on my way. Mmm... angel cake. I wish I had some now. So I'd be weaving between zombie shoppers, angel cake stuffed in my mouth, when I'd suddenly get the bright idea that maybe this isn't a good place to be right now. So once again, I'd dramatically smash through a window and roll to my feet, guns blazing. But once again, I don't have a gun. Which actually kind of sucks.

So, back on the street. Zombies are in their cars, but due to their ~~major stupidity~~ limited intelligence they don't know how to unbuckle their seatbelts and open their car doors, so I'd probably stand there for a minute, laughing at them. Then the other zombies would begin to get closer, so I'd take off down the street. After a while, I'd end up at Costco, which is freaking amazing in a zombie apocalypse. How fortunate that I would have the idea to go there. I'd push past the zombie greeter who'd try to give me a coupon for 20% off all hair care products and run to the back, where they keep the fish. I'd grab a particularly large one and I'd have my weapon.

Zombies are closing in on all sides, so I'd have to think fast. Suddenly, I'd realize that I HAVE A FREAKING WEAPON. So I'd start smacking the crap outta every zombie in my path with my awesome fish, eventually working my way to the center. I'd find myself surrounded by DVDs and Blu-Ray discs, and I'd probably pick up a boxed set of The Office, chuckling as I recall some of the funniest moments. Then I'd realize that there are zombies right next to me, also chuckling at their precious Office memories. But considering their zombie-ness, it'd be more of a gargle.

That's when they'd remember that they're zombies, and I set my fish down to pick up the DVD, so I'd be ZOMBEHFIED!!! The end.[/color]

phunke guest	Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 8, 2010 23:13:57 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Post by phunke on Sept 8, 2010 23:13:57 GMT -5 HO LY CRAP that was AMAZING. I was seriously laughing reading that. omfg. xD

magnet Merchant [M:-70] 109 POSTS last seen Oct 14, 2011 20:21:34 GMT -5 Raphale Grey D5 FTW	Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 8, 2010 23:26:10 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by magnet on Sept 8, 2010 23:26:10 GMT -5 Nice post jack but once you got in the market with no weapons I knew you were dead. Also listen to the zombie survival guide it is a funny book and I know it's fake but it could be very helpful if it does happen.
	Last Edit: Sept 9, 2010 2:42:56 GMT -5 by magnet

Anarchy is BACK!! Career Tribute 538 POSTS last seen Mar 24, 2014 20:30:58 GMT -5 "For the friends that I lost...and those I have gained."	Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 9, 2010 0:37:28 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Anarchy is BACK!! on Sept 9, 2010 0:37:28 GMT -5 That was hilarious Jack! Even though you didn't survive, at least you had fun with a fish. And magnet...I found that book in the humor section of the bookstore I went to.

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Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 9, 2010 0:49:56 GMT -5

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Post by cinder on Sept 9, 2010 0:49:56 GMT -5

You fools, how do you think the zombies got there? You ask me for my "plans" but obviously I am the mastermind behind the zombie apocalypse ~~plus after reading The Dead-Tossed Waves/In The Forest Of Hands And Teeth I convinced myself I'm immune to the zombie strain of... well I can't go there but um,~~ and you will all be safe as long as you yell BRAINS and NOMMUSHNUMMMMOHH. Those are the command signals for my Alpha-wave zombie brained friends. Pretty much means 'F*** off, I'm within yelling distance of a hoard of you undead. I'm a hero/heroine, do you think I have any goddamned brains left? No sirry, I am all luck and canned foods my disturbed neighbor kept in a Panic Room next door!

[/s]

The zombie language is very complex. You may take lessons in a Tutoring thread or buy the sound-making book at Urban Outfitters. I'm for serious.

Nawww, besides this I actually have multiple plans that OWN. Today in art class I found a measuring tool sharp enough to cut heads off and immediately plotted the death of my inhuman classmates. Zombie-Apocalypse is was a legit fear of mine for years. Try watching Night of the Living Dead in a cemetery a few days before Halloween... at night with DEAD PEOPLE ALL OVER THE PLACE! =^.^= So I'll post my real plans later. Note that they are not very different compared to my Your Regular 'Ol Apocalypse plans, except in this version I'm incredibly talented with a gun and seemingly know how to drive ~~my black camaro 2011 with white stripes down the middle. My mother is planning on purchasing one in about six months ^^~~ [/size][/blockquote][/color]

Last Edit: Sept 9, 2010 0:50:44 GMT -5 by cinder

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Jasik District Mayor [M:-3775] 792 POSTS last seen Mar 6, 2020 17:24:40 GMT -5 When in doubt, just flail about	Zombie Apocalypse Plans. Sept 9, 2010 7:05:15 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Jasik on Sept 9, 2010 7:05:15 GMT -5 Nice post Cinder xD And I have the Zombie Survival Guide, but I wasn't exactly basing my survival story off of that book. And I'm 13, how long do you expect me to survive, anyway?