Until We Fall (gxk, East)

Stare
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and i will hold you tight / like the moon in the arms of the sky

Until We Fall (gxk, East) Sept 30, 2011 21:50:33 GMT -5

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Post by Stare on Sept 30, 2011 21:50:33 GMT -5

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It's becoming harder and harder to tell my nightmares from reality. My second night in that horrible room is filled once again with darkness and commands. Sobs grow louder and louder as I twist and turn on my cloud-like bed, and for some reason I keep thinking of strings, strings, strings even though it seems that all movements are done without them. Yet, I awaken to the same basic thing. My mother's sobs echoing in my mind, people ordering me left and right, and me following the orders blindly. Dress in this. Eat a large breakfast. Don't speak to anyone. Go back to your room. Come out of your room. Go to the Training Center without your escort today.

The place is already alive and busy by the time I walk through the door, dark crescents underlining my eyes. Every movement is automatic. I don't both walking around others- they either move out of my way or I run into them. When I finally reach the center, I spin around, eyes staring blankly around. One hand comes up to mess around with all too neat hair, and the other spins around at my side as my eyebrows draw together slightly. Nothing makes sense in this place of metal and sweat- I hear the cling cling of blades striking each other again and again, and people having low conversation. I see the flashes of shining silver knives, and I smell the perspiration of those working hard around me. But none of it makes sense- I don't know these people, I don't recognize these things.

I'm hopeless, I realize tiredly. Hopeless and helpless. Finally, sighing, I walk over to the self defense. The instructor nods at me and gestures to several swords. I choose one at random, and the instructor frowns. "A beginner, eh? Well, you should know that the sword you have chosen is far too large." She gestures to another one. "Take that."

The lessons start off rather badly, but I find myself steadily improving as we move on. A few of the people up above watch me with a slight interest, but I ignore them. It's their fault that I've left my family and friends behind for this world of many horrors. Their fault that I will never be able to leap from trees, and their fault that I won't be returning to my wonderful home in District Seven.

Strings, strings, strings...

Frowning in concentration, my sword moves to the side to block another attack successfully. The trainer nods. "Take a break, or your work will become sloppy." Hardly friendly, but I take her advice and drop the sword on the table where I found it, dropping down onto the normal floor and leaning against a cool wall. My breathing heavy, I glance around at the many different people. Finally tapping one on the shoulder, I politely ask, "Do you know where I can get some water?"

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Until We Fall (gxk, East) Oct 1, 2011 19:44:28 GMT -5

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Post by gxk on Oct 1, 2011 19:44:28 GMT -5

~NAIDA GARDEZ~

The Training Center was freezing cold, it was like ice had been put in her blood. Naida was not sure if the change in temperature was the actual room or her nerves. She hugged herself closely. All the other tributes seemed to settle in relatively well. Some quite skilled with weapons already. Flashes of sliver from the sword fighting practice made her flinch. The hanging of a training dummy nearing brought tears to her eyes. She was doomed. She couldn't compete with any of this. What was she? The crazy girl from District Four. Raiden, think of him. Soon she'd be with him again, she just had to keep telling herself that. It wouldn't be long before she was reunited with her brother. He'd been dead for 8 long years now... The thought made her heart ache. It was time she saw him again anyway.

It was years ago, God knows
When you strained to tell me your whole truth
That you were not mine to save
That you could not change

What could she do? First Aid seemed like a good idea, but so did edible/medicinal plants, and then there was fire making... She could learn something from every station, but there wasn't enough time for that. Green eyes fixed on a spear, she knew spears. Growing up in a fishing family she could use a spear, and make fishing rods out of scratch. Maybe not too helpful, but it was something. Picking up the spear, she was surprised at it's weight. Because it was meant to kill humans, not fish... Approaching a training dummy, she could feel sets of eyes on her. What could the crazy girl do? The thought angered her. Why did everyone always assume she was a loon with no ability to take care of herself? With a growl she thrust the spear into the dummy's throat and twisted while pulling out. Once more she stabbed the dummy, this time in the heart. Twist and pull. One more attack was sent into its stomach. Her display of aggression had earned her some confused looks. Even Naida wasn't sure what had come over her. Glaring back at those watching she hurled the spear into the chest area of a hanging dummy. Way to draw attention to myself.

Would it be enough to go by
If we could sail on the wind and the dark
Cut those chains in the middle of the night
That had you pulled apart

Scurrying away from the spears, Naida wished she could paint herself into a corner and disappear. Never in her life had she felt so alone. Here no one was her friend. Her tearful good bye to Raviv, Ilayda, and her parents was fresh in her mind. And then Dillion had shown up to say goodbye, and brought her flowers... Tears stung her eyes. It was a battle not to cry as she recalled the time in the Justice Building. What ate at her the most was the looks on Raviv and Ilayda's young faces. They had seen to much for kids their age. And now she was going to die to. But they would be okay without her, they had to be....

So I turned back to breathing
I learned a few good reasons to cry
And I finally called home
Praying you weren't out of range

A tap on the shoulder startled Naida, and earned a yelp. One of the other tributes... What would they want with her? Heart pounding Naida began to sob hysterically. Every so often she would mutter things no one could understanding, keeping her face hidden behind her shaking hands. "Do you know where I can get some water?" Taking a moment to gather herself, she looked at the girl who stood before her. She was pretty, that Naida's first thought. And she didn't look like she wanted to hurt Naida, she looked pretty scared herself. Water. "Water. There's lots of water at home. So much beautiful water... The ocean, I miss it."

Would it be enough to go by
If there's moonlight pulling the tide
Would it be enough to live on
If my love could keep you alive

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Until We Fall (gxk, East) Oct 2, 2011 13:59:24 GMT -5

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Post by Eastern Orange on Oct 2, 2011 13:59:24 GMT -5

I look up from the ground, breathing heavily, sweat pouring from my face, and plastering my long hair to my forehead. I growl when I get the salty concoction in my eyes, and left an arm to rub away the sting. In my brief moment of blindness, my sparring instructor lets out a snarl of disgust and brings what I presume to be his leg down on my shoulder, forcing me to my knees. I groan as my knee caps hit the hard floor, sending jagged spikes of pain snaking up my legs. "Are you insane? If you had been in the arena, you'd be dead. Never take your eyes off your opponent." My teacher scolds, towering over me and cracking his knuckles. "You are done for today. I can't believe you have shown such stupidity."

I slink away, my pride burning fiercely, and feeling immensely ashamed of myself. I furiously rub the sweat from my face with the bottom of my shirt, muttering obscenities to myself. I was doing it while walking, so I couldn't see where I was going. Remembering what my instructor just told me about keeping my eyes open, I stop and pull my shirt back down. It's a good thing I stopped where I did, because if I hadn't I would have crashed into two girls, but unfortunately, I was still standing really close to them, and had walked up to them like I had something to say. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. I turn beet red.

Since coming to the Capital, I have not talked to any of the other tributes, even the girl that came with me. I had grown up separated from everyone, and had learned to relay on myself, so I hadn't gone out of my way to make friends. Especially friends that were girls. I had barely talked to other boys my age in my life time, and I had talked to the opposite sex even less. Needless to say, I have no clue how to handle them. Do you talk to them special? Do you treat them special? Hell, I don't know how to handle people in general. "Uh...Hello." I say, fumbling from some of my normal self-assurance. I realize I'm standing way to close, and back up a few steps. "I'm Berkley from Eight." I recognize one of the girls from the sword fighting station. I had watched her for a few brief minutes, while I was stretching. I grab hold of that, relieved that I could make small talk. "Hey, you were the one learning to sword fight. You could use some work." I realize that what a said was rude, right as it leaves my mouth. I wince, and mentally smack myself. "I mean...you were getting good." I smile, hoping she won't take offense to my blunder.

What am I even doing? I don't talk to people. I'm a loner and I can only trust myself. I shouldn't be making friends. I should be training. I left my hand up and stoke the dog collar I was wearing around my neck, seeking comfort from the worn leather. It was the collar of my beloved dog, Rook. I had to get back to her, she was alone without me. In order to do that, I'd have to suck it up and make some friends.

Stare
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and i will hold you tight / like the moon in the arms of the sky

Until We Fall (gxk, East) Oct 3, 2011 21:06:26 GMT -5

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Post by Stare on Oct 3, 2011 21:06:26 GMT -5

Made by the wonderful and amazing Shrimp<3

Every moment seems to reveal new complications- what seemed so easy on T.V. is in reality ten times more difficult. The first monster appeared that night when the Capitol called me, twisting my name around and around so that is suffocated me (it wasn't their name to take, or their sunset to steal). And the numbness creeped out if it's shadowy hiding spot just behind my heart where it had been so patiently waiting (waiting...), and slowly spread. A clever thief, it stole everything- my reaction, my emotion, my thoughts, so that I couldn't feel anymore. There was just me and the world and nothing in between but that was okay because it stole my ability to panic along with everything else. Only my mother's tears saved me from completely falling into my own emptiness- the first monster had almost consumed me, for I was unable to save myself.

Fear and hope came next, less consuming but in some ways more dangerous- they filled my heart and emptied it at the same time, so that I was confused. Fear was something I did not recognize at first, because it had been such a long time since I felt it. Hope... well, hope was the more terrifying of the two. Hope could fill me, make me feel so happy and ready, pouring confidence into my soul... and then it would vanish in an instant, taking everything it had given me and leaving me an empty shell. The battle with these two was well fought, and eventually, I banished them back to the dark part of my mind where they came from.

But now, seeing the glittering tears almost instantaneously spilling out of bright green eyes, a new monster rises. Guilt. Guilt, just at scaring her to the point of crying (really, I don't see why she is acting this way- I only tapped her on the shoulder). But guilt is yet another enormous obstacle, for if I feel guilty about making her cry, how will I feel once I enter the Arena and actually start attacking people? This sudden new emotion startles me and I stumble back for a moment, gripping the warm, slippery bar that surrounds the practice area for Self Defense. After a moment of recovering myself and breathing in the stench of sweat that is now thick and heavy on the air, I reach a pale hand forward to comfort her. She looks up before I do so, though, once again revealing beautiful eyes that are the same brilliant hue as the emerald leaves that adorn long tree limps of the great forests back at home. She's quite beautiful (well, I'm sure that she would be if her eyes weren't puffy and pink and her face streaked with tears), and to my surprise and horror, I remember a name. Naida.

"Water. There's lots of water at home. So much beautiful water... The ocean, I miss it."

More memories flood in with these words... Naida, from District Four. Yes, memories come clearly now, each making me more and more horrified. How will I feel if I see this girl's face up in the sky in the Arena? I can't afford to become attached to anyone- not anymore. I don't know exactly what to say to her, but am saved by the sudden appearance of another tribute who looks just about ready to say something. Startled, I eye him curiously.

"Uh... hello. I'm Berkley from Eight," he says. Not exactly a smooth introduction, but I allow him to continue. "Hey, you were the one learning to sword fight. You could use some work." My eyebrows shoot up and my mouth opens ever so slightly at the insult. "I mean...you were getting good."

I give a small snort. "Nice save," I say sarcastically, glancing at Naida for a moment to see who she agrees with. I see no change in her expression, however, so I continue. "Well, from what I saw, you weren't doing too hot either."

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gxk
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Until We Fall (gxk, East) Oct 4, 2011 14:31:09 GMT -5

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Post by gxk on Oct 4, 2011 14:31:09 GMT -5

~NAIDA GARDEZ~

Naida had never been good at meeting new people, even before her sanity dwindled to what is was now. She always counted on Raiden to look after her and introduce her. Now he wasn't here. No one was here for her. Closing green eyes Naida pictured her brother as he died. That smile never left his beautiful face. Even as his skin grew pale from blood lose, and green-blue eyes shut for the last time, he was smiling. If her brother could lose his life with such grace at only fifteen years old, then at seventeen she could make it through these Games without breaking down and waiting for death to find her. She would die soon enough, the rest of her short life should be spent with some meaning. Raviv and Ilayda deserved that much from her. The poor kids... They had already lost Raiden. Naida's only comfort is that no one lives forever, they would meet again. Raviv's bright eyes full of concern, Ilayda's tear streaked face. The mental picture drew a shuttering breath from Naida.

The voice of a new comer snapped her attention. A boy had joined her and the pretty blonde that had scared her. Speaking of which, Naida regretted acting up when she was tapped on the shoulder, the blue-eyed girl looked as if she felt sorry for her. Everyone always felt sorry for her. Whether or not this girl knew her brother's fate or not, Naida herself was sad enough a sight. The boy, Berkley, from District Eight was seven or so inches taller than Naida. She had to look upwards to meet his eyes. He and the blonde made a light banter, one Naida couldn't help but smile at. It reminded her faintly of her and her siblings when they were all together. Only this was much much different. The Training Center in the Capitol was a far painful cry from the sandy beaches and calming ocean of home.

Feeling the need to join in Naida found her voice, "Actually I think you both have room to improve. I could take you both at the same time with my fishing spear." She laughed. At home she'd been quite the talented fisher, and that severed her well here. The feeling of the spear in her hand was familiar. "Guess that's to be expected though, seeing as all I did at home was fish. Naida, District Four." Her voice cracked with nervousness, but for the most part she was surprised at how well she was managing to hold it together.

Grabbing a length of rope off a hook on the wall her hands began weaving knots all on their own. Each movement she'd done thousands of time back home. A net, as long as she could make a sturdy net she'd be able to catch something. Or someone. The two before her were pretty easy for her to get along with. They didn't frighten her as badly as many of the other tributes. The most frightening she'd seen so far was the group of four boys. They'd be a tough alliance, and they were making her uncomfortable as they checked out all the female tributes. Pigs. The rope in her hands was starting to take the shape of a strong net with a tight weave, not much would be able to slip through it. Anything worth catching would be trapped. Everyone always assumed you could cut a net of rope off, and you could, but by the time you got an arm loose to use the knife it could be all over. Naida didn't look up to see if the other two were watching her, she'd busied herself with her task. After a few more moments, a decent sized net was complete. A smile tugged at the corner of her lips.

"My brother taught me everything I know about fishing and surviving in general... It served him well in his Games." Her voice took on a far away tone. Whenever Raiden entered a conversation it was like she expected him to appear. Eyes shinning and a smile on his face, it seemed like he should be here...

Last Edit: Oct 4, 2011 16:42:13 GMT -5 by gxk

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Until We Fall (gxk, East) Oct 4, 2011 15:57:14 GMT -5

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Post by Eastern Orange on Oct 4, 2011 15:57:14 GMT -5

My heart sinks when the girl replies back with something sarcastic. So I had been offensive. I really need to watch myself, I may just unwittingly make some enemies. I decide to smile in response to her retort, instead coming back with something snide; I don't want to ruffle any more feathers. I'm relieved when the other girl makes a joke, defusing any argument that could have arisen. "I'm sure you could." I say, completely serious. I have no experience what-so-ever when it comes to fighting, not even a little tussle when I was a kid. I've lived a very sheltered life. I feel a rush of envy toward the girl; I'd give anything to have come in here with an advantage like that.

I watch with interest as the girl, Nadia, plucks a length of rope from the wall and starts to expertly knot it into a net. My eyes widen in amazement, impressed at her speed and skill. I decide right then and there that she's someone I want on my side, and if I couldn't win her over, well, I know who I'm going for first. "Wow, you are quite talented. I wish I had something to show some District Eight pride, but we don't do much there. I mean, I can shoe a horse, but I don't know how helpful that's going to be in the arena." I shrug, laughing.

Well, there is one thing I can think of that might give me an advantage. From an early age, I have thrown around burlap sacks filled with grains, moved bales of hay, worked for hours in the hot sun shaving and herding sheep. I've had to traverse the wide expansive of my property multiple times a day. What does that translate to? I'm in excellent physical condition. I know how to spend hours upon hours working, with few or no brakes. I'm not some fat city boy. Nadia is talented, yes, but I also have some things going for me too.

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Until We Fall (gxk, East) Oct 4, 2011 21:27:53 GMT -5

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Post by Stare on Oct 4, 2011 21:27:53 GMT -5

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She yelled at me again today.

She yelled at me about how I was lazy and how I wasn't doing well in impressing the Capitol. She yelled at me about how I was appearing weak to the Capitol. She yelled at me about my behavior, and about how hopeless and helpless I've been acting. She yelled at me and yelled at me and yelled at me, and all the while I sat there, taking every verbal blow with a flinch. Not once did I respond, because everything she said was true. It's time for me to step up and act strong, even if I'm falling apart on the inside.

Yet, it feels so wrong for her to tell me to be someone other than who I am. Not a strong tribute, or amazingly mysterious, or good looking, or funny, or romantic. The only thing I am is fearless, but I find myself beginning to doubt even that. It seems that the Games are even more terrifying than jumping out of trees. So, in all honesty, who they see is who I am- a scared little girl lost in a big city. And now they are changing me, one emotion at a time- shaping me and hardening me to be the Victor they so desperately want. But the thing is, I'm not a Victor. I don't think I'm going to win- I'm not confident. I doubt I'll even make it past Day 1.

Naida manages to break the tension quickly. My eyebrows draw together slightly, even as I'm laughing (not a real laugh. Never a real laugh. They stole my laugh along with my name). Something's off about Naida... something I can't quite place, though I feel that if I stare into her emerald eyes long enough, I'll figure it out. But I can't, and so my digits instead travel downward, to watch her hands work quick to create a fishing net. Only District Four citizens can do something like that- she might have a rather large advantage in the Arena.

I smile at Berkley's comment, agreeing with him completely. I blush slightly as I think of all my greatest skills- pretending, cutting down trees, and falling. None of which will come in much handy in the Arena. "Well, that's better than what I can do," I say quietly, staring down at my feet. "Not to say that I'm not skilled in anything, but in comparison to everyone else... well, the things I'm good at won't really give me any advantages in the Arena."

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Until We Fall (gxk, East) Oct 7, 2011 20:24:16 GMT -5

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Post by gxk on Oct 7, 2011 20:24:16 GMT -5

~NAIDA GARDEZ~

Turning rope into a net was something that had provided Naida with comfort. It was something she would do on the ships at home, while the wind wiped sea spray on her face. Here there was no ocean. How Naida longed for the calming sea, and strong waves. There was nothing like the beauty of her home here in the Capitol. But beauty didn't matter now, all that mattered was trying to stay alive. Raiden had been a survivor and fought until the very end. She was willing to die. That was the whole point of being here. Dying, and seeing Raiden, Alba, and Takeba again. A sense of longing gripped her. What she wouldn't give to be in her big brother's arms. It was the safest place in the whole world. Even more so than her parents. Raiden always understood her. Guilty was the next emotion Naida felt. What if Raviv and Ilayda were suffering the way she had for years now? Too late to worry about that now. There was no escape, time to face whatever was to come.

Both of the others seemed impressed by her skill with the rope, painting a blush on Naida's cheeks. Really it was nothing special. If they had ever had a chance to go to Four, they would realize how common a practice it was. "It's nothing special. Back home everyone can make nets from rope. My brother, he was exceptional at it though. Just like everything else he did. It- It was so hard when he was murdered.... Lost, never coming back, I need to see him again... She hadn't even noticed when her words drifted to the crazed whispers of her past, and memories of her beloved brother. Even after death he was the most important part of her life. If she could have one wish, it would be to have been able to be by her brother's side when he died in the arena. To have been able to hold his hand and stroke his hair while he passed. Letting him know how loved he was, is.

Looking up from her thoughts, Naida managed a smile. "I guess I should warn you, I'm not always all the way there... Umm mentally I mean. Sometimes I can't tell what's real and what I'm imagining. So much changed..." Looking at her feet she waited for the scorn and rejection. It was only fair she let them know the truth, or at least part of it, before they decided if they still wanted anything to do with her. It seemed to Naida they were the group of misfits. They didn't really fit in anywhere else. Once again she felt the eyes of the group of boys on her, maybe it was just paranoia, she could never be sure. She shot a questioning glance in their direction. Maybe she was pretty to look at. Her brother's were both very handsome, and it was easy to see Ilayda would grow into a gorgeous young women, but they didn't know her... Trying to avoid the uncomfortable feeling she turned her whole focus onto her new acquaintances. "My older brother died in the Games nine years ago... My family seems to have some rotten luck."