Taking a Break

For a multitude of reasons that I am about to list, I am gonna take a slight break from the site (probably means one day, but whatever). This break will end the day of the 60th reaping at the latest (yes, i will renew all my crap and enter), and will not include CBD and any other Ratmass activity i deem interesting.

Generally, I feel like everyone (myself included) is taking this site too seriously, like it is more than what it is supposed to be. Don't think I am the be all end all person when it comes to this, but last time I checked, the site was meant to be a place where people have fun. I have fun alright, but when posting, not in chat as much anymore. I don't see why people take things so seriously to be honest, when I came everyone was so much more, relaxed, less obsessed over plots, more chill in general. Everyone was like a family (even though everyone hated me, besides the point). Now, I feel like that has changed, not everyone likes everyone, and this isn't just including me and other people. Overall, this site is less enjoyable than it was 14 months ago for me, and I am sad to say that.

Well, I guess that is really it when it comes to my venting/frustration. The fact that people can't take this for what it is, a fun, enjoyable, not as important as real life, website, kinda ruins the place for me.

Now, knowing myself, this self-imposed leaving will last all of a day or two. But I feel like I have to do it and vent in this. And I know nobody will respond, because let's be honest: Not many of you like me, and I'm fine with that. You're all just people who i met online anyway, you have no effect on my life. I like some of you quite a bit, and I'm sure you know who you are, just based on how i act. I don't mean to insult any of you like this, not at all, but that is all you are to me, most of you at least.

Point being, this sounds a lot more like I am leaving for good, and if you ban me for this post because you don't like me (main reason), and because I sound like a jerk, fine. It'll suck for me, but I don't see the point in being part of a community where people don't let others speak, after all, this is america last time i checked. we are all entitled to our own opinions.

Not sure how I got there, I have ADHD, explains a lot.

Also, the site has become so much more cliquey than before, even when I came and i thought you were all a clique, it was just a clique without me in it. Now there are actual cliques, and I could care less that I am not part of one, hell, I'm not in a clique in real life, I'm more of a kinda friends with most people guy. I wouldn't mind if I was ostracized from one giant clique, but I came to this site and stayed not only because I was a newb, but also because I thought everyone was so nice. That has changed, and I guess I have changed to. I don't want to point fingers, but I've become my cocky, self-absored, asshole self on here because others are so cliquey, it is a mechanism of defense against being hurt, one might say. (wow, I am opening up a lot, not what I planed, w/e). It is my way of coping, and I honestly could care less if you people like it or not. That message about cliques however many months ago was long overdue in my mind, and it absolutely changed nothing at all. I know who I can be myself to, and I know who I can't. That is the definition of a clique. For a site that prides itself on everyone liking everyone, that is starting to sound like a load of BS to me.

I know most people who dislike me wont read this, and they'll be like "yay, spesh is taking a break, that asshole", but I hope for those of you that read it, you understand me ever so slightly better because of it. And for those of you who i actually like and are decent to me, you know who you are, and thanks, i guess.

Point in case: I hope you understand where I'm coming from, and why I have to take my one to however many days break, whether you like what i've said or not.