My New Charecter

Hi, forevereverdeen and welcome to the site! :) This might seem like a lot, but I promise, it's not as much as it looks like!

First thing -- the title of the application needs to consist of the character's name and district, this is easier to locate applications for future references and it's just easier on the site as a whole.

Bellatrix actually has some great potential, there's just a few things that've got to be fixed before I can accept her. :) First off, none of your "body sections", if you will, meet the site minimum for a character application. We follow a 2-3-3 format, meaning there needs to be a minimum of two paragraphs for appearance, three paragraphs for personality, and three for history. We ask that the paragraphs include at least 5 well written sentences, which isn't too much. Just think of any way that you can expand on a certain trait. Don't be afraid to mix up some sections! (For example, Bellatrix is a female hunter, so you could possibly hint at why Bellatrix is that way without going in depth. It's a great way to add length, plus it keeps a reader's attention! :D) An easy way to lengthen appearance is to describe a little bit about each of the features on her (what color are her eyes and how do they react to certain natural settings, what color is her hair and is it unusual for her hair to be that way?).

Also, after reading her bio, she tends to have traits that are often found in a mary-sue when it comes to the Hunger Games fandom. Bellatrix is made up of quite a few traits that are also part of Katniss' character in the books. For example, she's very strong although she's skinny and she's not afraid to show her love for her family. "She fights her way through but can still be loving" is much like Katniss' character because Katniss did what she did for her family. Although Katniss and none of the characters found in the books are on this site, we still refer to them as references and try to stay away from duplicating their character as much as possible.

Bellatrix's character seems just a bit too good, especially for District 12 standards. It's fine for her to be skinny and still remain strong, just be sure to include a good reasoning behind it. Be sure to include a few negative traits in both the personality and appearance sections, but don't make them all negative! There's at least a little good in every person. :)

It might be best to copy the bio you've written and run it through spell check before it's posted and try to work out any kinks and grammar mistakes that you might've made while writing it. I can pick up on what you're saying, but quite a bit of punctuation is missing so it makes the application a bit harder to read and comprehend. Those are easy fixes, though! :)

Lastly, your codeword is incorrect. It's partially correct, and I know you know where the rules are, or else you wouldn't have those letters again. Just take another look and scan each section carefully, and it should come out to a term that's part of the Hunger Games trilogy. :) I think you'll be able to find it easily.

To make your changes, just click "modify" on your original post, edit what you've written, and then click save. You'll know the codeword is correct if an image replaces the word that says "Code Correct!"

So, all in all, you need to:

• change the title of this thread/application to include your character's name and district
  
• make the appearance section at least two paragraphs (10 sentences) and make both the history and personality a total of three paragraphs each (15 sentences)
  
• add a few flaws to both the appearance and personality sections
  
• finish finding the codeword (if you can't, don't be afraid to ask for help! we won't tell you the answer but we'll point you in the right direction)
  

Whenever you've made those changes, just reply to this thread saying that you've made them and I'll be glad to take another look! <3 :)