Slipping into the Dark (Cattleya Jenning's death)

The world fades slowly as the darkness threatens to envelope me for good. Not again. I lean over the table and throw up everything in my stomach. I've been staying in the healer's shack for what seems like 2 weeks. My sense of time is not very reliable as of late , so I'm not really sure on the exact time. I'm not deluded ; I know the end is coming. "More medicine!" The healer says ,shoving the mixture of herbs down my throat. I don't know why she bothers. We all know I'm going to die. Even my mom knows , no matter how much she tries to forget about it. District 11 just doesn't have the technology to save me.

I can imagine what will happen once I'm gone. My mom will be very depressed. Everyone else? They probably won't even blink an eye. I finger the bed sheet as I begin to drift in and out of consciousness again. I feel forces pulling me under and pulling back. I decide to give in. Not fully , just enough to stop the turmoil in my soul. Rain begins to drum on the roof , and lulls me into a peaceful sleep . Or death. Right now , I'm not really sure which one it is. I tuck my head to the pillow and disconnect from the world.

When I wake up , my mum is by my bedside. She's singing softly. "Mum" I croak. "Good, you're up. The healer needs to give you some more herbs." She says in a commanding voice , not at all like her usual quiet tone. "Why are you bothering anyways?" I ask her. "I don't want to let you go down with a fight." she says. " I just love you so much." " I love you too , mom" I say. That's all I get to say before the tears start to stream down my mother's face. I'd be crying too , if I had the strength.

I lean back into the mattress and attempt to forget about my imminent death that awaits me. I watch the people in the orchards pluck the apples from the branches. I see animals preparing their homes for the approaching winter. I wish I could be like a bird. They don't have to worry about the hunger games , or being poor. Basically , they have the life that everyone in district 11 dreams of. Although , I guess once I die , I won't need any of that. However, I can't possibly know what comes after death. I guess I didn't do a very good job of keeping myself from thinking about death.